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We have to listen to it at work, because it's the single type of music with the broadest demographic appeal in our area. Good marketing, I'm sure, but it doesn't change the fact that it sucks. At least, I know it sucks. However, two of my coworkers, a Mexican and a Peruvian, think country music is wonderful and cannot understand why I mime projectile vomiting every time they play that damned "God is great, beer is good" song. The Mexican is a wiseass who just sings along louder to irritate me, so I've given up on him, but the Peruvian fellow is a nice guy who insists that country is Good American Music. How do I get through to him?
My Spanish isn't bad, but too limited for explaining complex lines of thought, and his English is about the same. I have tried "Eso chupa los huevos de burro," but that's not very specific. "Es la musica para personas que joden caballos," accompanied by cupped hands around my crotch and suggestive hip-thrusting, is a little better, but he just laughed.
Really, there are many different reasons why country music is an abomination. My principal reason is that country music glorifies a degenerate, filthy, ungodly backwoods ****-kicker lifestyle. Witness "'Cause I gave up smoking, women and drinking last night...it was the worst fifteen minutes of my life." Also some hee-haw singing about how, when we were boys and girls, we didn't have no bottled water, we drank from a garden hose. Speak for yourself, you dirt-caked cousin-diddler; I grew up in civilized parts. I shouldn't be exposed to this cornball rubbish in the workplace. But the best I could do to communicate this was a garbled parallel: "You're Peruvian, right? How would you like listening to music that suggests all Peruvians are unwashed morons who squat in the mountains eating llamas all day or something?" That would have worked better if I knew enough about Peru to know what hurtful stereotypes there are about its people.
Plus, as pure music, it's just tepid and uninspired.
My Spanish isn't bad, but too limited for explaining complex lines of thought, and his English is about the same. I have tried "Eso chupa los huevos de burro," but that's not very specific. "Es la musica para personas que joden caballos," accompanied by cupped hands around my crotch and suggestive hip-thrusting, is a little better, but he just laughed.
Really, there are many different reasons why country music is an abomination. My principal reason is that country music glorifies a degenerate, filthy, ungodly backwoods ****-kicker lifestyle. Witness "'Cause I gave up smoking, women and drinking last night...it was the worst fifteen minutes of my life." Also some hee-haw singing about how, when we were boys and girls, we didn't have no bottled water, we drank from a garden hose. Speak for yourself, you dirt-caked cousin-diddler; I grew up in civilized parts. I shouldn't be exposed to this cornball rubbish in the workplace. But the best I could do to communicate this was a garbled parallel: "You're Peruvian, right? How would you like listening to music that suggests all Peruvians are unwashed morons who squat in the mountains eating llamas all day or something?" That would have worked better if I knew enough about Peru to know what hurtful stereotypes there are about its people.
Plus, as pure music, it's just tepid and uninspired.
Words of wisdom.
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