Why is it...

[Blake]

Why is it that when I need to buy more TP, I always forget it so I have to come back to just buy TP. And I can't just buy TP. Thjat's like "Ohh you're going home to take a big dump, aren't ya?". So I have to get other stuff too then, just to be kind of less obvious. But that makes me look even more stupid because everyone knows I'm buying that other stuff, like the key chain and plastic bag and a snickers bar just to... well OK.

Well that's just paranoia. Really, you aren't that interesting to the checkout chick or the other shoppers, their heads are already full of stupid thoughts about other things.

I'll give you some practical advice.

Go into the supermarket, and buy nothing except a carrot (a nice fat carrot) and a tub of Vaseline. Seriously.

And see what happens at the checkout.

There could be nothing more incriminating than a carrot and jar of Vaseline, so you will then understand the worst which can happen.

And if you've started enjoying this game, immediately go to returns and say "Wait, I've decided I don't need this Vaseline after all. I do still want the carrot though".
And see what happens.

And then write up a half page report on apolyton!

[Pekka]

No, first of all, the checkout girls ARE AWLAYS interested in me.

Now, the carrot and vaselin thing sounds awesome. I might seriously try it or something similar. I like those kinds of "pranks" so I might just as well do it

Now here's a little known FACT. There's a videotape of me and this is true, more than one copy, of me first negotiating with people outside a store to get money if I go in naked and buy a chocolate bar. This is true. So this one guy was like cool and laughed, and so I took my clothes off, everything, absolutely 100% naked and I walked in. You know what happened? There was a damn line and I had to wait in it!!!! True story . Everyone acted as if I wasn't there, few people were like "look! That dude is naked!" and the clerk actually laughed. It was a small place with no guards, but I definitely was in the line like few minutes, just casually hanging out with my penis out. Then I got back out, put on my clothes and went on with the day.

True story, but it happened like... maybe 6 years ago?

[Cort Haus]

Re: Why is it...

Originally posted by Pekka

Why is it, that when ever I watch a movie late at night, it's difficult to adjust the audio? You see, the talking scenes, MORE VOLUME! But then few seconds later a door slams in it or a car starts *WROOOOM!* VOLUME DOWN!! I hate this volume game. Listen, fix the audio ****ers.

It's dodgy engineering imo. Compression is the process that evens out the sound, damping down the peaks and boosting the troughs. When it's done properly you can hear the dialogue without waking the neighbourhood and loosening the plaster on the walls during the car chases and shootouts, but I suspect that films are often engineered for cinema audio systems, not domestic ones.

[Pekka]

It's weird, I've never thought about this, but I think at least 300... maybe up to 400 people have seen my penis.

[Tiamat]

Originally posted by Pekka
SHUT YOUR PIEHOLE, WOMAN!

See, only two lines here.

And if you had opened your eyehole ignorant little worm that you are, you would have seen that it was thread not post. That you were incapable of making a thread of substance in three sentences or under.

[Tiamat]

Originally posted by Pekka
It's weird, I've never thought about this, but I think at least 300... maybe up to 400 people have seen my penis.

Nobody needs to know this, I can assure you!! NOBODY!!

[Pekka]

I see. You are this eager to go into the basement? Well let me tell you something right now, you are not to make any sounds there, you are not to put the lights on. You will clean the basement in dark and quietly.

[VetLegion]

Originally posted by Pekka
Now here's a little known FACT. There's a videotape of me and this is true, more than one copy, of me first negotiating with people outside a store to get money if I go in naked and buy a chocolate bar. This is true. So this one guy was like cool and laughed, and so I took my clothes off, everything, absolutely 100% naked and I walked in.

Was it a bet for the sake of betting or did you win something?

And the tape might prove problematic later on when you go into politics, but then again, 50% of the voters are ladies and perhaps wouldn't mind seeing that video.

[Pekka]

No bet, didn't win anything.
I hate politics, I'm gorgeous anyway, and yes there's one master tape and at least 2 copies made that I know of.

[Pekka]

Oh and TIamat, I'll be going to bed in 20 minutes. THis is the time you have to stop acting like a beast and apologize to me like a civilized woman and not some basement mongrel. Show us where your place is.