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Individual Right to Arm Bears

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  • #16
    No! Bears are assh*les.

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    • #17
      Originally posted by Tattila the Hun
      Not sure about arms, they could punch you and stuff. With fists, of course.

      Now, armored bears are cool.
      No, they're not. Pullman sucks.

      WRT arming bears, it depends on the kind of armament. Giving them normal guns is obviously not fair, as they lack opposable thumbs. At the very least they would require highly modified weapons, perhaps shoulder-mounted shotguns like the plasma-caster used by the Predator. I am not sure how such a weapon could be triggered or reloaded, though. The bear would need a continuous human escort to keep it loaded, and very few bears have the kind of money needed to hire a manservant. A right nobody can afford to exercise is hardly a right at all.

      OTOH, recent advances in technology make more unconventional weaponry a possibility in the coming decades. I am thinking here of knee-mounted kinetic generators, compact lithium-ion batteries and any number of energy weapons. Lasers are a possibility, as are microwave pain-rays and DEMP cannons for destroying the many electronic-warfare devices employed by backwoods critters today. As technology progresses even farther, full-fledged "bearborgs" are just around the corner.

      Aside from the initial cost of installation, these systems would be self-maintaining. Said initial costs could be government-subsidized at first, and paid off in a short term of service by the bears receiving modification. INS in particular could really use patrol bears. Those damned Mexicans might sneak right past a minuteman, but one look at a good American battle-bear would send them running back to their taquerias. Makes me feel wildly patriotic just thinking about it.
      1011 1100
      Pyrebound--a free online serial fantasy novel

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      • #18
        Originally posted by Elok


        No, they're not. Pullman sucks.
        Yes they are, and no idea. Never read any of his books.
        I've allways wanted to play "Russ Meyer's Civilization"

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        • #19
          Yes, without question.
          Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.
          "Hating America is something best left to Mobius. He is an expert Yank hater.
          He also hates Texans and Australians, he does diversify." ~ Braindead

          Comment


          • #20
            Originally posted by Elok

            Aside from the initial cost of installation, these systems would be self-maintaining. Said initial costs could be government-subsidized at first, and paid off in a short term of service by the bears receiving modification. INS in particular could really use patrol bears. Those damned Mexicans might sneak right past a minuteman, but one look at a good American battle-bear would send them running back to their taquerias. Makes me feel wildly patriotic just thinking about it.
            They could also be used for drug enforcement. DEA Bears!
            I'm consitently stupid- Japher
            I think that opinion in the United States is decidedly different from the rest of the world because we have a free press -- by free, I mean a virgorously presented right wing point of view on the air and available to all.- Ned

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            • #21
              Or you could just put frickin' laser beams on their foreheads.
              I'm consitently stupid- Japher
              I think that opinion in the United States is decidedly different from the rest of the world because we have a free press -- by free, I mean a virgorously presented right wing point of view on the air and available to all.- Ned

              Comment


              • #22
                Anyone that thinks Americans will disarm needs to lay off the peyote buttons.
                Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.
                "Hating America is something best left to Mobius. He is an expert Yank hater.
                He also hates Texans and Australians, he does diversify." ~ Braindead

                Comment


                • #23
                  Wrong thread Sloww, this is about bears and their constitutional right to own firearms... or is it about the rights for a person to own a bear's arms?

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                  • #24
                    First they came for the bears.....
                    Blah

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                    • #25
                      You clowns are just a bunch of communist anti-bearites.
                      "The French caused the war [Persian Gulf war, 1991]" - Ned
                      "you people who bash Bush have no appreciation for one of the great presidents in our history." - Ned
                      "I wish I had gay sex in the boy scouts" - Dissident

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                      • #26
                        9 people voted for the right to arm bears?

                        That's still shocking, even considering that this is ACS.
                        I drank beer. I like beer. I still like beer. ... Do you like beer Senator?
                        - Justice Brett Kavanaugh

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                        • #27
                          Ten now, commie. If God didn't want bears to have arms, he wouldn't have transposed the words in His Constitution.
                          "The French caused the war [Persian Gulf war, 1991]" - Ned
                          "you people who bash Bush have no appreciation for one of the great presidents in our history." - Ned
                          "I wish I had gay sex in the boy scouts" - Dissident

                          Comment


                          • #28
                            Arm bears? Whoa, Nellie. I did screw th epooch on this one. Hell, no. Don't arm bears.
                            Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.
                            "Hating America is something best left to Mobius. He is an expert Yank hater.
                            He also hates Texans and Australians, he does diversify." ~ Braindead

                            Comment


                            • #29
                              Originally posted by Kidicious
                              9 people voted for the right to arm bears?

                              That's still shocking, even considering that this is ACS.
                              It's more shocking that some people voted for Monday.

                              Comment


                              • #30
                                I'm consitently stupid- Japher
                                I think that opinion in the United States is decidedly different from the rest of the world because we have a free press -- by free, I mean a virgorously presented right wing point of view on the air and available to all.- Ned

                                Comment

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