Part 2: What do gays PRIMARILY look for in their partners?

[Lorizael]

Originally posted by Spec
So why is it stereotypical to say that guys get in fights far more than women do for example?

See, scientific studies have been conducted showing that, whether by nature of nurture, men are generally more aggressive than women. In that case, the stereotype holds true.

Can you cite reputable, scientific sources for your other generalizations?

[Spec]

Originally posted by Lorizael


See, scientific studies have been conducted showing that, whether by nature of nurture, men are generally more aggressive than women. In that case, the stereotype holds true.

Can you cite reputable, scientific sources for your other generalizations?

I am not going to google shlt all day to come up with scientific studies that prove that security isn't a requirement for men when looking for a relationship, but it is for women. I know its a fact, may it be socially implanted in their brains or not, its a fact IN GENERAL.

Now, knowing this, what do gays look for in a partner since there is no extended social acceptance for gays? You are not raised as a gay child, you just are. What do they base their judgement on then? Is it easier for them to make up their mind on what they want since they were not put into a boy/girl category permanently? Or is it harder since they are mixed up when feeling they desire boys when they are boys?

Does anyone understand anything I am saying?

Spec.

[Arrian]

Cort Haus

Is it stereotypical to call a lion a lazy ass that waits for the lionesse to bring in lunch? You better not say no. So why is it stereotypical to say that guys get in fights far more than women do for example?

Human society =! lions in nature (and I, for one, am thankful). We haven't existed in a "state of nature" for quite some time now. Our genes are still pretty much what they were back before civilization, and it shows through often, sure. And yes, gender roles come from somewhere (thousands of years of human history + prehistory before that).

What is your point? Or perhaps I'll leave you to do your "screw you guys, I'm goin' home" thing by refusing to answer. Whatever.

EDIT: ah, your last post makes it clear what you're after. Finally. And of course, that one I will have to leave to our gay posters, because I haven't the foggiest idea.

-Arrian

[Spec]

Originally posted by Arrian
What is your point? Or perhaps I'll leave you to do your "screw you guys, I'm goin' home" thing by refusing to answer. Whatever.

-Arrian

Dont underestimate me, I never ever do that. I am very hard headed.

EDIT: read post 92. Thank you.

Spec.

[Arrian]

Spec, I was referring to a specific post you made on the last page, wherin you said you weren't going to give your opinion because we wouldn't get it anyway or somesuch. It was in the middle of a rant/whine about how we wouldn't just agree with you...

Anyway, I edited my post based on your last one. I crossposted with you.

-Arrian

[Spec]

Originally posted by Arrian
EDIT: ah, your last post makes it clear what you're after. Finally. And of course, that one I will have to leave to our gay posters, because I haven't the foggiest idea.

-Arrian

Finally! I knew you weren't a dipshlt. Yay!

Hence why I said that the posters that could help me understand this are the ones that are giving me the most stupid answers, aka Asher and such.

Spec.

[Arrian]

Well gosh, thanks Spec!

You still haven't coughed up your opinion on the answer yet, though, so I think the jury is still out on you...

-Arrian

[Lorizael]

Originally posted by Spec
I am not going to google shlt all day to come up with scientific studies that prove that security isn't a requirement for men when looking for a relationship, but it is for women. I know its a fact, may it be socially implanted in their brains or not, its a fact IN GENERAL.

Now, knowing this, what do gays look for in a partner since there is no extended social acceptance for gays? You are not raised as a gay child, you just are. What do they base their judgement on then? Is it easier for them to make up their mind on what they want since they were not put into a boy/girl category permanently? Or is it harder since they are mixed up when feeling they desire boys when they are boys?

Does anyone understand anything I am saying?

Spec.

The thing is, we can speculate on an interesting point without making wild generalizations.

We can say, "What straight men and women look for in a long term romantic partner is dependent upon traditional values reinforced by genetics, family, society, etc. Because homosexual relationships differ from traditional societal expectations, what would influence the traits that homosexuals look for in a partner, and how would these differing influences shape homosexual relations?"

See? No assumptions required. No generalizations. No stating things as FACT that can actually be disputed. Just a point of discussion.

[Spec]

Originally posted by Arrian
Well gosh, thanks Spec!

You still haven't coughed up your opinion on the answer yet, though, so I think the jury is still out on you...

-Arrian

Well, I would like to have an answer to a question I asked, and I cant find an answer, an average, or a survey on that anywhere on the net.
IN GENERAL, ON AVERAGE, do gay couples last longer than hetero couples when they finaly decide to settle down? Mean 25 years and older approx.

Spec.

[Spec]

Originally posted by Lorizael


The thing is, we can speculate on an interesting point without making wild generalizations.

We can say, "What straight men and women look for in a long term romantic partner is dependent upon traditional values reinforced by genetics, family, society, etc. Because homosexual relationships differ from traditional societal expectations, what would influence the traits that homosexuals look for in a partner, and how would these differing influences shape homosexual relations?"

See? No assumptions required. No generalizations. No stating things as FACT that can actually be disputed. Just a point of discussion.

I am not politically correct...I dont have your wordiness skillz, Lori, and I never will. Thats why you're, imo, one of the top posters.

Spec.

[Lorizael]

There's a problem here in figuring out how to define a couple that has settled down. If we're talking married couples, gays have a much smaller sample size. If we're comparing marriages versus gay civil unions or just gay couples that live together, we're not comparing the same thing. If we're comparing couples who are together but not married, that's a much harder population segment to identify.

[Arrian]

I believe the statistics that do exist (and they are few & far between) indicate that gay relationships do not last very long on average.

The question, obviously, is why? The answer I find most persuasive is actually multiple answers:

1) Being gay carries with it a social stigma. This has lessened of late in the more progressive countries, but generally speaking it's tough to be openly gay on this here planet Earth. That can mess up people's heads, skew data, etc.

2) Given #1, most societies at least frown upon gay couples, so long-term stable gay relationships are difficult, or at the very least carefully hidden. This may change going forward in places such as, say, Canada.

3) There are various political agendas at work, and statistics can be used & abused for political reasons.

-Arrian

[Spec]

Originally posted by Lorizael
There's a problem here in figuring out how to define a couple that has settled down. If we're talking married couples, gays have a much smaller sample size. If we're comparing marriages versus gay civil unions or just gay couples that live together, we're not comparing the same thing. If we're comparing couples who are together but not married, that's a much harder population segment to identify.

I am talking about long terme relationships. Married, not married, I dont care. In my mind, marriage means nothing, its a piece of paper.

Spec.

[Lorizael]

Originally posted by Spec
I am not politically correct...I dont have your wordiness skillz, Lori, and I never will. Thats why you're, imo, one of the top posters.

Spec.

At long last, my one true desire has been realized!

[Lorizael]

Originally posted by Spec
I am talking about long terme relationships. Married, not married, I dont care. In my mind, marriage means nothing, its a piece of paper.

Spec.

In your mind, sure, but not in others. It's an ancient social institution that carries great psychological weight. Well, generally speaking anyways.