Dangerous birds

[Tim_Augustus]

At least it wasn't one of THESE...

[Pekka]

People give too much respect for these birds. There's some real bastards in the bird community. Even other birds don't like some of them. So I'm supposed to go like, "yes yes birdie, I like you because you are left out of the bird community." Why? You know, there's usually a good reason why they're being disrespected. And since I don't know what kind of a crime the bird is guilty of, I'm just going to take them with the face value of guilty bastard bird.

[Pekka]

It's like seeing a bear in the woods. You're like woaah, they're so cute, furry and friendly looking. They're like pets!

No they aren't. They will kill you. They will put you into horrible horror movie death! You don't have much chances. Survivors tells us all about the nature of these bastard bears, too. Have you ever heard of a story where the human just hugs the bear or tries to reason with it when the bear is coming for the human? NO. Because it doesn't happen!

The ones that manage to survive, they usually end up missing some body parts. Do you go and tell them that they were being brutes for beating the bear up with guns? These bears don't have any rights to kill us. I accept them as long as they stay in the woods and don't kill our women.

As long as they show negative attitude towards us, we can and should kill them until their timely deaths of natural lives. Bears and birds, it's the same thing. Both begin with a B and are hostile and some of them are cool but just like humans, some of them are bastards and they deserve everything they get.

[Pekka]

And before you PETA members get your panties in a twist, we are more worthy. Why? Well.... first of all, these animals don't have rights to kill us. That's only fair. Humans don't have a right to kill other humans, I don't see why animals should have more privilidges, like the authority to kill berry pickers.

Now, you can say they have a different system. They follow the laws of nature. OK, so do we! And look at those laws, we come on top! So yeah, wanna declare war? We can kill ALL the animals. Let's follow your stupid law of nature and we will be unchallenged. They don't even know what hit them.

It'll be so easy too, we are more sophisticated. Just to illustrate the superiority, we can go and push buttons and kill them, get it over with and come back to our houses and watch Simpsons on DVD we bought from another part of the world. These animals don't even know about the world, let alone have any cool navigation systems. OR SYSTEMS, period.

That's right, we don't even have to break a sweat to slaughter the rest of the bastard animals.

[Kataphraktoi]

You can most easily capture birds by throwing towels over them, it looks like the bird will get hurt easy but they are stronger than they look. I have also caught them in sheds with my bare hand-to avoid injuring the bird, you need to be swift and sudden when its flutting against the glass, quickly stride up and grab it. if you clap your hands together so that the edges touch but its hollow inside, there is plenty of room, and the bird quickly quiets down.

;=glass wall
'''=wall
|=door
....=floor

my shed:

;;;;;;|...'
;......|...'
;..........'
;..........'
;.....|....'
;'''''''| '''''''

Birds keep getting trapped in the left pocket and they cant figure out, you need to back up a bit in order to go forward. Im getting quite used to grabbing birds by now

[Patroklos]

reminds me of the bird that got trapped in our hanger bay as we went out to sea on my carrier. That thing was flying around for hours. And we had big ass doors it could fly out (sometimes they are shut during bad weather). It eventually found it's way out the hanger bay doors. I have no idea if it was a land bird or sea bird. But unlikely it could have survived 20 or so miles out to sea. May have been further out than that, can't remember how long it was in there. Maybe days.

When we were in the Red Sea we had whole swarms of small birds that I can only guess were blown out to see and saw us as a life boat. We would have 30 at a time flying all over the place, spend many a watch feeding them on the bridge wings.

There were so many that eventually we had a few hawks and owls start living in the Mast to eat the little birds. You would be sitting there minding your own business and Whoosh! The hawk would streak mast you and be sitting there under the 5" barrel, tearing some little bird apart.

Unfortunately, being were we were, we had the SPY arrays on full power, I'd watch them fly in front of them and thinking that must not feel too good. They all died, even the hawks, after a few days of flying in the radar energy.

[onodera]

Originally posted by Pekka
And before you PETA members get your panties in a twist, we are more worthy. Why? Well.... first of all, these animals don't have rights to kill us. That's only fair. Humans don't have a right to kill other humans, I don't see why animals should have more privilidges, like the authority to kill berry pickers.

Now, you can say they have a different system. They follow the laws of nature. OK, so do we! And look at those laws, we come on top! So yeah, wanna declare war? We can kill ALL the animals. Let's follow your stupid law of nature and we will be unchallenged. They don't even know what hit them.

It'll be so easy too, we are more sophisticated. Just to illustrate the superiority, we can go and push buttons and kill them, get it over with and come back to our houses and watch Simpsons on DVD we bought from another part of the world. These animals don't even know about the world, let alone have any cool navigation systems. OR SYSTEMS, period.

That's right, we don't even have to break a sweat to slaughter the rest of the bastard animals.

The part in bold makes me snicker. Migratory birds, Pekka, eh? But PETA is still

[Pekka]

Animals on a killing rampage aren't funny. And humans ARE superior if we follow the law of nature. So even with their terms, we rule, they suck.

[Proteus_MST]

Put an average human into a forest, alone and naked with no equipment, nothing but his superiority, put an average bear there as well. Watch and determine who survives longer

[Patroklos]

How much lead time do I get?

[Pekka]

Proteus, yeah, except all those tools etc are the ones that makes us superior.

That's like saying well, chop off the legs and arms of a bear and leave it on its back and let's see what happens. Of course I'll win.

[Proteus_MST]

Originally posted by Patroklos
How much lead time do I get?

None of course, your human superiority must suffice.

But you are far enough from the bear so he won´t catch and kill you only moments after the start of the experiment.
Another question would be if you could be considered to be an average human. Posting on Apolyton might be a sign of being above average

[Proteus_MST]

Originally posted by Pekka
Proteus, yeah, except all those tools etc are the ones that makes us superior.

That's like saying well, chop off the legs and arms of a bear and leave it on its back and let's see what happens. Of course I'll win.

You are born without tools on your body (except for your hands that can be used for making them and your brain to develop concepts for making them).
I´d say as long as you aren´t able to produce the tools to survive with your own hands in a natural environment you cannot be called superior (as tools can easily be taken away, in contrast to arms and legs.
Tools can even be turned by other animals against humans themselves. There was for example one case where a hunting dog accidentally shot his master with a shotgun that was carelessly placed on the ground.
So is this special dog superior to the hunter? After all he used a tool to kill him.

[Aeson]

Originally posted by Proteus_MST
Put an average human into a forest, alone and naked with no equipment, nothing but his superiority, put an average bear there as well. Watch and determine who survives longer

Your hypothetical (or at least it's spirit) already played out thousands of years ago.

Now it's not a valid environment to judge superiority, mainly because humans have changed their environments to suit them.

[Proteus_MST]

I wouldn´t question the superiority of human culture in contrast to that of other animals, and that´s what is responsible for the many inventions mankind now has in its hands.

It was the ingenuity of a Hrrugh (who was one of those who found ways to preserve fire) or a Kzita (famous cave painter) which were first steps into making the world into the world we know, and especially the discovery of ways to make these discoveries into a tradition (by means of language, painting and, in later times, writing) , so that the fire wouldn´t have to be literally reinvented with every new generation as the original discoverer died without having the chance to give his knowledge away to others.

But the average human (that doesn´t himself contribute to human culture but only makes use of the tools that human culture gives him)
well, take away the tools that are provided due to human culture (and were not invented by him but by other above average humans) and leave him alone in the wilderness and every predator can show him who´s superior and, as well, many if not most of the other animals have better chances of survival than himself.