When to take the hint

[Lorizael]

Originally posted by Oerdin
The rule of thumb is best window for ****ing a chick is with in a week or two of meeting her so if you've waited years and have been put on the friends ladder then you're already at a major disadvantage. You either need to make a major explicit move immediately or give it up and find other game.

I haven't really been waiting years and years to do this. When I say that we've known each other for four years, what I mean is that we went to the same high school and have some mutual friends. Recently, we've gotten closer.

[Lorizael]

Originally posted by Arrian
Something to bear in mind when taking advice about women from me:

1) I've had 2 serious girlfriends, and there was a third who would've been, but I was too ****ed up in the head for that to happen at the time. Which probably saved me, but that's another matter.
2) #2 is my wife.
3) My wife hunted me down.
4) #1 was the one I chased, and though I did at one point "stand tall" (successfully, leading directly to her becoming my gf), I now believe that me chasing her left me at a disadvantage in the relationship that I never quite dug myself out of.

So on the one hand I'm happily married. I have, in fact, attracted women. However, my experience is quite limited, and my feeble attempts pre-college were often much as you describe (minus the internet stalking stuff).

-Arrian

I'd be curious to find out how many really serious girlfriends most men actually have before finally settling down and getting married.

[KrazyHorse]

One plus my wife

"Serious" meaning anything 6 months or greater.

[Arrian]

Clearly that's the way to go!

-Arrian

[Lorizael]

Damn, I've already had two. Maybe I can get one of the previous ones to marry me.

[Arrian]

Live not in the past! In the future your happiness is! Hrmrmmm!



-Arrian

[Japher]

grammar bad your sentence uses

KH: that's is what we call "whipped", your wife has obviously conned you...

My wife was my first serious gf

[dannubis]

1 (7.5 years) + 1 now (2 years)

The 3 years in between I ran after one who also was sending uot mixed messages. In the end you tire from it and look for greener pastures

[Dinner]

Re: When to take the hint

Originally posted by Lorizael

Jane is a flake. Jane also goes to college in Rhode Island (but is home (in Maryland) for summer break now). Jane is bad at modern forms of communication. Lorizael is bad at initiating communication with females. Lorizael becomes discouraged easily and assumes the worst intentions of those he tries to talk to.

Then the short answer is Jane isn't that in to you. Either do something major to change that dynamic or accept it and move on.

[Dinner]

Originally posted by Grandpa Troll
Umm, take a break from all internet save Apolyton

Go out, go to grocery stores, department stores, electronic stores, video stores, ect.

Strike up a casual conversation sans any 1 on 1 intentions.

Ask anything from in the food store, whats the easiest way to bake fish
or bake chicken

in other stores same, insert item there.

Just build up experiencing interaction.

Now go out and when you find yourself attracted to (not necessarily in a sexual way) someone, strike up a conversation, perhaps suggest bowling or a movie or maybe pool.

Just some free advice.

Grandpa "Used 2 B ah Playah" Troll

The old man has good advice. I'd add that you should also find ways to improve your life. Get into better shape (we can always improve), make a list of things you want to do in your life and do one of them (maybe learn to paint or play guitar, etc...), do something you'd never ever do like go swing dancing, and just get outside of your normal routine so that you're trying new experiences and meeting new people.

[Lorizael]

Originally posted by Oerdin
The old man has good advice. I'd add that you should also find ways to improve your life. Get into better shape (we can always improve), make a list of things you want to do in your life and do one of them (maybe learn to paint or play guitar, etc...), do something you'd never ever do like go swing dancing, and just get outside of your normal routine so that you're trying new experiences and meeting new people.

This is definitely good advice. One of the reasons I'm pursuing Jane rather strongly right now is that she's just about the only available female in my life given what I do with it.

Females in my life include: one ex-girlfriend/good friend, one bestfriend I'm in love with, one girlfriend/life partner of a good friend, a few married coworkers, etc.

If I went out to parties or clubs, if I made better use of online resources, if I tried talking to some of the attractive and unmarried females who work in different places in my giant cube of an office building, I'd have more options.

Easier said than done, of course.

[LordShiva]

You should go out to parties and clubs, especially if you still live in DC.

[Lorizael]

Re: Re: When to take the hint

Originally posted by Oerdin
...do something major to change that dynamic...

Also, what does this even mean?

[Jon Miller]

Yeah, I have the problem of no women in my life (like I don't know any, period).

I Really think that I should move back to Maryland, I didn't have much success there, but at least I knew women. It is hard to have any success if you don't meet anyone, and I haven't met anyone for a long time.

Pretty much since I moved down here.

JM

[LordShiva]

Saturday Night Dupont Circle PolyMeet

LS wingmanning Lori and JM