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Ahem!
I have late breaking information that refutes this bogus claim by those weenies who call themselves scientists @ CNN. My full report is below:
*****
I write this missive with the light heart of one who bears great, astonishing news, and I am pleased to have been at ground zero when a SECOND of life's deep mysteries was solved. I think I'm starting a trend here!
As you recall, the first great mystery to be solved was the definition of exactly how many items constituted a "$hitload."
I am truly surprised that my stellar research in this area didn't net me the Nobel Prize, but....I've got an e-mail off to the committee, so we'll see if they don't remedy that gross oversight!
And in the meantime....I have definitive proof that provides the answer to ANOTHER profound mystery!
Let me explain:
You see, today at lunch, my boss Scott and I wandered to the Sacred Temple of IHOP (named in honor of an all but forgotten Egyptian God, IHOTEP).
While there, Scott ordered the breakfast sampler....two eggs (scrambled), sausages, ham, pancakes....quite yummy, by all reports, and I....I got the Southwestern Chicken Fajita Salad (in the handy-dandy edible tortilla bowl).
Now....the significance of these events is as follows:
After our respective orders had been placed, it occurred to me that we were once more on the threshold of vast, forbidden knowledge. Knowledge so profound that it could shake the very foundations of civilization as we know it.
Which came first, the chicken, or the egg?
We sat in silent anticipation of the event, watching Esther, our wise and all-knowing Chinese waitress, with baited breath, knowing that she was the instrument of wisdom, and that patience would soon yield the answer to the question we had not realized we had been seeking until said orders had been placed.
We waited.
And by and by, Esther the Magnificent made her appearance, bearing food.
She set them on the table with little ceremony, and the answer was given.
My salad hit the table some two seconds before the Breakfast Sampler.
The chicken came first.
Mystery SOLVED!
-=Vel=-
I have late breaking information that refutes this bogus claim by those weenies who call themselves scientists @ CNN. My full report is below:
*****
I write this missive with the light heart of one who bears great, astonishing news, and I am pleased to have been at ground zero when a SECOND of life's deep mysteries was solved. I think I'm starting a trend here!
As you recall, the first great mystery to be solved was the definition of exactly how many items constituted a "$hitload."
I am truly surprised that my stellar research in this area didn't net me the Nobel Prize, but....I've got an e-mail off to the committee, so we'll see if they don't remedy that gross oversight!
And in the meantime....I have definitive proof that provides the answer to ANOTHER profound mystery!
Let me explain:
You see, today at lunch, my boss Scott and I wandered to the Sacred Temple of IHOP (named in honor of an all but forgotten Egyptian God, IHOTEP).
While there, Scott ordered the breakfast sampler....two eggs (scrambled), sausages, ham, pancakes....quite yummy, by all reports, and I....I got the Southwestern Chicken Fajita Salad (in the handy-dandy edible tortilla bowl).
Now....the significance of these events is as follows:
After our respective orders had been placed, it occurred to me that we were once more on the threshold of vast, forbidden knowledge. Knowledge so profound that it could shake the very foundations of civilization as we know it.
Which came first, the chicken, or the egg?
We sat in silent anticipation of the event, watching Esther, our wise and all-knowing Chinese waitress, with baited breath, knowing that she was the instrument of wisdom, and that patience would soon yield the answer to the question we had not realized we had been seeking until said orders had been placed.
We waited.
And by and by, Esther the Magnificent made her appearance, bearing food.
She set them on the table with little ceremony, and the answer was given.
My salad hit the table some two seconds before the Breakfast Sampler.
The chicken came first.
Mystery SOLVED!
-=Vel=-
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