Rugby - Hands Off Black!

[finbar]

Yes, I noticed. They seem to be playing well. Pity I can't find any of their match reports to see how much (or otherwise) he is contributing.

[Havak]

Can't find much mention of Plank but you can find a match report here:

Ulster v Sarries

[finbar]

Oh well, he obviously - at least - didn't disgrace himself. Enough to earn a mention anyway.

And I've found a team to support!

[Havak]

Tigers?

[finbar]

I had the chance to listen to them on the weekend and deliberately chose not to!



EDIT. I just noticed the pic of G. Rowntree on the BBC site. He didn't take any pretty pills in his two months off.

[Havak]

You chose not to? Whyever not?

Graham's nick name is 'Wiggy'. Derived from 'EAR Wig'. And now I think you know why.

[ravagon]

Hullo all,

Rushed of my feet and can't stop but for a minute.
Got this in my inbox yesterday. It came from one of those clever Australian people.

An Aussie, Kiwi and an Indian...

A Kiwi was sitting with an Australian and an Indian in Saudi Arabia, sharing a smuggled barrel of beer, when all of a sudden, Saudi police entered and arrested them. They were initially sentenced to death but they contested this and were finally imprisoned for life.

But, as it was a national holiday, the Sheikh decided they should be released after receiving 20 lashes of the whip. As they were preparing for their punishment, the Sheikh suddenly said: "It's my first wife's birthday today, and she asked me to allow each of you one wish before your whipping."
So the Indian guy thought for a while and then said:" Please be tieing a pillow to my back." This was done but the pillow only lasted10 lashes before the whip went through.

The Kiwi, watching the scene, said: "Please fix two pillows on my back". But even two
pillows could only take 10 lashes before the whip went through again.

Before the Australian could say something, the Sheikh turned to him and said: "As you are from a popular country, and your rugby team are terrific, and your women beautiful you can have two wishes!".

"Thank you, Most Royal and Merciful Highness", The Australian replies. "My first wish is: I would like to have 40 lashes."

"If you so desire", the Sheik replies with a questioning look on his face, "and your second wish?"


"Tie the Kiwi to my back", the Aussie answers.

[Havak]

I forgot to mention that after Henson was tackled by Corry and stayed down for about 90 seconds (to do his hair presumably) the Tigers crowd treated him to a chorus of "Mr tangerine man".

And here is something to make Finbar's year - breaking news on the BBC web site says Austin Healey is to retire (from full time playing) at the end of the season.

Tigers rumour mill suggests he will play some coaching role for us next season.

[finbar]

Makes for an interesting Tigers' coaching staff line up next year:

Forwards coach
Backs coach
Lineout coach

and

Gibberish coach

[Havak]

Gavin Henson just cannot keep his stupid young mouth shut can he? CoT must be so proud to have such an intelligent ambassador for Welsh rugby?

The comeback was due to their cheating in and around the ruck. They got out of difficult areas and scored tries from it. They got away with it, but we're aware of it now. We feel hurt and cheated and will let them know about it on Sunday

Let us know anything you like Gavin – but change your forwards if you want to compete better. It’s really quite amusing as Gavin of course never cheats.

Tigers got away with a couple of clearing infringements at rucks – but the way Neath-Swansea played in the second half deserved nothing from the game – and that’s exactly what they got.

His coach Lyn Jones then jumped on the bandwagon:

Leicester came out with different tactics and a different mind set in the second half. Perhaps the launderette people can shrink our jerseys back to size because they got pulled out of all shape and size in those 40 minutes. It was very disappointing. We've all done it as players and had it done to us, and in the good old days you would have taken the law into your own hands. Now, if it repeatedly happens - as it did at Welford Road - you expect the referee to take action and show cards

Ah Diddums – did the nasty Englishmen embaress you?

Take the law into you own hands? At Welford Road? You would have gone back to Neath in a meat wagon. Tigers are no light weights in the old style of players sorting things out themselves.

Hopefully this is all the motivation Tigers need to stuff the taffs on Sunday.

I said a long time ago that one welsh coach is the most unsporting and ungracious I have ever seen – that being the sour faced Garin Jenkins of Llanelli Scarletts.

He has been on the whining juice too:

Maybe Wasps' expectation was too big. We had looked at the game tactically and applied pressure to their weaknesses. It's not just Wasps, maybe it's an English thing but it never ceases to amaze me. There's always an expectation when an English side come down to play in Wales that they have a divine right to win irrespective of how they play. That's not the case, you have to be a good team to win down here.

What a racist prat. No Englishman with an ounce of common sense thinks playing down in Wales is easy. Any English club that goes there knows they will face a huge and very physical challenge. Being English pretty much guarantees that.

What Garin is not acknowledging is the Shaun Edwards factor with Wasps. I pointed it out at the end of last season. Wasps never give opponents credit for beating them – Wasps always ‘lose’ games themselves. They trot out the same stuff that got Jenkins so riled every time they lose to Tigers (so quite a lot then).

That said I would be amazed if Llanelli beat them again this weekend – I think Wasps are a better side than Scarletts and will bounce back impressively.

Jenkins also talks of his dies great track record in the cup which is interesting. This is the first year they have drawn a difficult pool that I can recall – and every time they met a big French, Irish or English club in the knockout stages they fell at that hurdle. They won’t get out the pool this year (a certain French side will see to that)

But then Scarletts are the Welsh Wasps – in that they have a grossly inflated self image. I wonder if CoT remembers the classic Chief Execs quote when the Llanelli name was under threat as the provinces formed? “Llanelli is a brand name the equal of any club in the rugby world and we must preserve it” WTF???? A few SANZAR fans MAY have heard of Tigers or Wasps or Quins etc – I doubt ANY have ever heard of Llanelli or Neath or Gwent!!!!

[finbar]

The pork pie for morning tea gave you serious indigestion, hm?

[finbar]

*puts fingers in ears in anticipation of Havak's diatribe against Nancy Henson*

[ravagon]

Originally posted by Havak

But then Scarletts are the Welsh Wasps – in that they have a grossly inflated self image. I wonder if CoT remembers the classic Chief Execs quote when the Llanelli name was under threat as the provinces formed? “Llanelli is a brand name the equal of any club in the rugby world and we must preserve it” WTF???? A few SANZAR fans MAY have heard of Tigers or Wasps or Quins etc – I doubt ANY have ever heard of Llanelli or Neath or Gwent!!!!

I've heard of Llanelli (although I was under the impression it was Lianelli).
No idea about the others though.

Strangely enough my main impressions of this corner of the world can pretty much be summed up by the following:-

Tigers good.
Sharks bad.
Wasps utter rubbish.



Now I really have no idea from whence these impressions spring so I'm inclined to agree with finbar for once and just say that I am indeed spouting a load of complete ****.

[finbar]

Originally posted by ravagon

Now I really have no idea from whence these impressions spring so I'm inclined to agree with finbar for once and just say that I am indeed spouting a load of complete ****.

The first step on the road to self-awareness is the hardest, Grasshopper.

About 40 men in ill-fitting Father Christmas costumes ran around Auckland vandalising or stealing property, and throwing bottles, police say.

I'm in awe of you. I don't have 39 friends.

In other news, Plank has been cited for punching against Saracens. Better late than never.

In other other news, Nancy Henson has been cited for everything short of genocide.

[Havak]

Actually you were not that far off.

Strange games at the weekend. Tigers beating Ospreys with the very last play of the game (oh how I laughed!) and Wasps absolutely stuffing Llanelli (sweet revenge for the arrogant Jenkins nonsense from last week?).

The Tigers game of course was mired in controversy. Ospreys had a ‘punch to victory’ game plan and two pieces of exceptionally dirty play have been cited by the independent official. One of the welsh locks deliberately kicked Harry Ellis in the back of the knee and may well have blown Harry’s ACL doing so – bad news for England.

Tangerine gob s**** elbowed our Italian (blatant attempt to get Finbar on side) prop in the face (two week ban) and then went to kick him in the head on the floor (three month ban) but being so brilliant he missed a static target with the kick!!! He shattered the guys nose and blood was everywhere. Henson must be banned for a good long time – he needs teaching a lesson.

And the welsh coach said?

Last week Gavin had his head stamped on and there was no citing so I don't foresee repercussions.

Oh – that’s okay then. Something that didn’t happen and wasn’t cited should let Gavin get off with violent play from the return leg? What a pratt!

Henson got rucked out when laying all over the ball last weekend – but it was nowhere near his head! As witnessed by the fact it was not cited. Where do they get this endless string of moronic welsh coaches shooting their mouth? The Sir Clive diplomatic Academy?

Hope that didn’t disappoint Finbar?