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Oi women are teh confusing. 'Poly women mind translating for me?
Why can't you be a non-conformist just like everybody else?
It's no good (from an evolutionary point of view) to have the physique of Tarzan if you have the sex drive of a philosopher. -- Michael Ruse
The Nedaverse I can accept, but not the Berzaverse. There can only be so many alternate realities. -- Elok
you still believe it even though as a woman with lots of
life experiences...... im telling you with all honesty that its not true.
that most women would and do want to
be friends first before sex. that most women respect
a man who is able to do that. that most women don't want to be loved only for sexual favors.
that most women want and need companionship above sex.
and yes i think its fine and acceptable to cuddle in a bed
without any sexual intent... and yes i would do that with someone i was just friends with at the time...and yes i would like that even above sex. and no i never exclude friends from possible future relationships.
i don't have two ladders and i don't know any woman who does.
with any current friend there is always the
possiblity of it growing into something more. if you don't like someone why would you continue to be friends. and if you do like someone then there is always the possiblity of growing closer.
life situations change and people change and people grow and its one of the wonderful things about life is that nothing is out of the range of possiblity.
i was friends with a man for several years before i
even went out with him... and for all that time i never
thought of him as anything but a friend.
and then one night we kissed and everything changed
and i ended up married to him.. a few years after that.
and AZ nothing in life is "rock solid"
"If you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun." -Katherine Hepburn
and yes i think its fine and acceptable to cuddle in a bed without any sexual intent
Making men into cuddle *****es.
“I give you a new commandment, that you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”
- John 13:34-35 (NRSV)
Originally posted by Ben Kenobi
Ask her what she means by a friend. Tell her where you come from friends don't sleep in each other's beds.
Is it just me that sees this as pretty normal? I mean, I have lots of female friends I'm close to like that, that doesn't seem much like a romantic thing.
Smile For though he was master of the world, he was not quite sure what to do next
But he would think of something "Hm. I suppose I should get my waffle a santa hat." - Kuciwalker
Is it just me that sees this as pretty normal? I mean, I have lots of female friends I'm close to like that, that doesn't seem much like a romantic thing.
yes its perfectly normal
"If you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun." -Katherine Hepburn
any you wanna be more than just friends with? that's the true line, from where I see it:
a) hanging around as a friend with a girl you want ( and I don't mean "I'd hit it", I mean "want", You people understand what I am talking about ), that sends terribly mixed messages around - cuddle b*tch.
b) hanging around as a friend, with a girl/women that you are intersted in as a friend only ( AND I MEAN IT, NO SECRET URGES, NO NOTHING.) - you can still consider her hittable, btw - a true friend.
Re: Oi women are teh confusing. 'Poly women mind translating for me?
Originally posted by Space05us
She insists we're just friends. Why does she call out of nowhere to talk about nothing? Why does she cuddle with me in my bed after work? She even waited almost 2 hours after she got off just to give me a ride home last night, and stayed out an hour longer than usual. She usually gets home by 1 at the latest, last night she stayed until almost 2:30.
Not that I mind, Im just confused. This is not normal friend stuff, is it?
IANAW, but...all of my close friends since the beginning of high school have been women (close being defined as actually going out and doing things rather than just being friendly if we happen to be in the same place at the same time.) I've had a few who were like this, which sometimes led to awkward situations, but we generally just laughed them off.
My advice is to just accept what she says at face value. People tend to like it when you do that. If you want to be her friend, be her friend...if you can't handle it, then don't. It's really not that complex a situation. While it could change in the future, there's no point in either trying to manipulate the situation or sitting around hoping and waiting to no end. A good number of the friendships I've had with women have gone back and forth between full relationships and 'just' friendship (a couple of them multiple times) but it was always in the context that we were friends who liked each other enough to be more for a while, and then we weren't. One of the relationships never got to the "weren't" phase, and we're getting married. I never saw the point of trying to go out and force things (or of not accepting 'just friends' either, but, to each his own.)
"In the beginning was the Word. Then came the ******* word processor." -Dan Simmons, Hyperion
and yes i think its fine and acceptable to cuddle in a bed
without any sexual intent... and yes i would do that with someone i was just friends with at the time...
Freak.
with any current friend there is always the
possiblity of it growing into something more. if you don't like someone why would you continue to be friends. and if you do like someone then there is always the possiblity of growing closer.
Contrary to ladder theory, I do have separate ladders. There are women I appreciate as friends, but with whom I'd never want to have a physical relationship with. I don't see what's odd about that. Maybe you're right that no woman think that way, but that's just further proof that women are messed up, then.
one of the wonderful things about life is that nothing is out of the range of possiblity.
People who believe that scare me.
Why can't you be a non-conformist just like everybody else?
It's no good (from an evolutionary point of view) to have the physique of Tarzan if you have the sex drive of a philosopher. -- Michael Ruse
The Nedaverse I can accept, but not the Berzaverse. There can only be so many alternate realities. -- Elok
did you ever think that maybe there is a part of life
your missing out on... being close to someone spiritually and emotionally .. not just sexually.
Cuddling is neither spiritual nor emotional - it's physical.
Why can't you be a non-conformist just like everybody else?
It's no good (from an evolutionary point of view) to have the physique of Tarzan if you have the sex drive of a philosopher. -- Michael Ruse
The Nedaverse I can accept, but not the Berzaverse. There can only be so many alternate realities. -- Elok
Originally posted by boann
did you ever think that maybe there is a part of life
your missing out on... being close to someone spiritually and emotionally .. not just sexually.
As LC pointed out, cuddling is a physical act. And if you really don't have interest in the guy sexually, then it is CRUEL! Because you are leading the guy on! When you are cuddling, the guy thinks there is a chance of something. That is why they are called 'cuddle *****'. Because they cuddle and cuddle, thinking something more is bound to happen, but they get caught.
If you don't think leading people on is cruel then there is no hope for you .
“I give you a new commandment, that you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”
- John 13:34-35 (NRSV)
Re: Re: Oi women are teh confusing. 'Poly women mind translating for me?
Originally posted by dv8ed
IANAW, but...all of my close friends since the beginning of high school have been women (close being defined as actually going out and doing things rather than just being friendly if we happen to be in the same place at the same time.) I've had a few who were like this, which sometimes led to awkward situations, but we generally just laughed them off.
My advice is to just accept what she says at face value. People tend to like it when you do that. If you want to be her friend, be her friend...if you can't handle it, then don't. It's really not that complex a situation. While it could change in the future, there's no point in either trying to manipulate the situation or sitting around hoping and waiting to no end. A good number of the friendships I've had with women have gone back and forth between full relationships and 'just' friendship (a couple of them multiple times) but it was always in the context that we were friends who liked each other enough to be more for a while, and then we weren't. One of the relationships never got to the "weren't" phase, and we're getting married. I never saw the point of trying to go out and force things (or of not accepting 'just friends' either, but, to each his own.)
exactly
"If you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun." -Katherine Hepburn
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