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Hey there, Orange -- has the cloning technology finally reached Apolyton?? 
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A lot of Republicans are not racist, but a lot of racists are Republican. -
Here's another good one. . .
Drunk on a bus
A drunk gets on a transit bus. The driver, impatient while the drunk fumbles in his pocket for change, drives off. As the bus starts rolling, the drunk reacts to the sudden movement by stumbling all the way to the back of the bus. The bus stops at the next stop. He reacts by stumbling to the front of the bus. Still the man is fumbling in his pockets for change. The bus jerks forward once again, and the drunk stumbles uncontrollably to the back of the bus. Next stop, the same thing happens. Every time the bus stops, the man would stagger to the front. Every time the bus starts, he staggers uncontrollably to the back. A few stops later the drunk exits the the bus from the front.
"Hey", shouts the bus driver... "You didn't pay your fare yet!"
The drunk, reeling, shouts back "And I'm not going to!..... I walked all the way!"
And I'll laugh at my own jokes if very well want to.
HAVE A DAY.
<--- Quote by Former U.S. President Theodore "Teddy" Roosevelt
"And there will be strange events in the skies--signs in the sun, moon, and stars. And down here on earth the nations will be in turmoil, perplexed by the roaring seas and strange tides. The courage of many people will falter because of the fearful fate they see coming upon the earth, because the stability of the very heavens will be broken up. Then everyone will see the Son of Man arrive on the clouds with power and great glory. So when all these things begin to happen, stand straight and look up, for your salvation is near!" --Luke 21:25-28
For the Lord himself will come down from heaven with a commanding shout, with the call of the archangel, and with the trumpet call of God. First, all the Christians who have died will rise from their graves. Then, together with them, we who are still alive and remain on the earth will be caught up in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air and remain with him forever. --1 Thessalonians 4:16-17Comment
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And yet another. . .
Beer Test
Yesterday scientists revealed that beer contains small traces of female hormones. To prove their theory, the scientists fed 100 men 12 pints of beer and observed that 100% of them gained weight, talked excessively without making sense, became emotional, and couldn't drive. -- No further testing is planned.
PWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Anyone willing to submit their own jokes?
HAVE A DAY.
<--- Quote by Former U.S. President Theodore "Teddy" Roosevelt
"And there will be strange events in the skies--signs in the sun, moon, and stars. And down here on earth the nations will be in turmoil, perplexed by the roaring seas and strange tides. The courage of many people will falter because of the fearful fate they see coming upon the earth, because the stability of the very heavens will be broken up. Then everyone will see the Son of Man arrive on the clouds with power and great glory. So when all these things begin to happen, stand straight and look up, for your salvation is near!" --Luke 21:25-28
For the Lord himself will come down from heaven with a commanding shout, with the call of the archangel, and with the trumpet call of God. First, all the Christians who have died will rise from their graves. Then, together with them, we who are still alive and remain on the earth will be caught up in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air and remain with him forever. --1 Thessalonians 4:16-17Comment
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Zwei peanuts vere valking down der strasse. One of them, vas a-salted!
"My dog has no nose"
"How does it smell?"
"Awful"A proud citizen of the only convicted terrorist harboring nation!
.13 posts per day, and proud of it!Comment
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Two words: King Clovis...
"mono has crazy flow and can rhyme words that shouldn't, like Eminem"
Drake Tungsten
"get contacts, get a haircut, get better clothes, and lose some weight"
Albert SpeerComment
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Drunk Crawler
A gentleman was at a bar very late and was extremely drunk. He decided that since he lived close to the bar he would go ahead and walk home.
He tried to get up and fell flat on his face.
He dragged himself across the bar to the door and tried to haul himself up again.
He fell again. he crawled down the street to his front door and tried to stand again. Again he fell.
He managed to drag himself upstairs to his bed. He passed out right there in the floor.
The next morning his wife looked at him and said, "Out drinking again I see!"
He replied, "How'd you know?"
She said, "The bar just called. You left your wheelchair there again."HAVE A DAY.
<--- Quote by Former U.S. President Theodore "Teddy" Roosevelt
"And there will be strange events in the skies--signs in the sun, moon, and stars. And down here on earth the nations will be in turmoil, perplexed by the roaring seas and strange tides. The courage of many people will falter because of the fearful fate they see coming upon the earth, because the stability of the very heavens will be broken up. Then everyone will see the Son of Man arrive on the clouds with power and great glory. So when all these things begin to happen, stand straight and look up, for your salvation is near!" --Luke 21:25-28
For the Lord himself will come down from heaven with a commanding shout, with the call of the archangel, and with the trumpet call of God. First, all the Christians who have died will rise from their graves. Then, together with them, we who are still alive and remain on the earth will be caught up in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air and remain with him forever. --1 Thessalonians 4:16-17Comment
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A man walked into a bar. Ouch!A proud citizen of the only convicted terrorist harboring nation!
.13 posts per day, and proud of it!Comment
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Nope, I've simply gone madOriginally posted by MrFun
Hey there, Orange -- has the cloning technology finally reached Apolyton??
"Chegitz, still angry about the fall of the Soviet Union in 1991?
You provide no source. You PROVIDE NOTHING! And yet you want to destroy capitalism.. you criminal..." - Fez
"I was hoping for a Communist utopia that would last forever." - Imran SiddiquiComment
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Hey, what is it with all these crossed out circle avatars? I was there first
Speaking of Erith:
"It's not twinned with anywhere, but it does have a suicide pact with Dagenham" - Linda SmithComment
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Must be because everyone likes you so much, PH.Click here if you're having trouble sleeping.
"We confess our little faults to persuade people that we have no large ones." - François de La RochefoucauldComment
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Well that goes without saying. I suppose imitation is a form of flattery
Speaking of Erith:
"It's not twinned with anywhere, but it does have a suicide pact with Dagenham" - Linda SmithComment
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I'd suggest not doing anything particurly bad for awhile, PH, just in case.
These are all such bad jokes, you all know that right? Still I can't stop laughing...Click here if you're having trouble sleeping.
"We confess our little faults to persuade people that we have no large ones." - François de La RochefoucauldComment
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If you don't think there funny, then post your own!Originally posted by Lorizael
These are all such bad jokes, you all know that
right? Still I can't stop laughing...HAVE A DAY.
<--- Quote by Former U.S. President Theodore "Teddy" Roosevelt
"And there will be strange events in the skies--signs in the sun, moon, and stars. And down here on earth the nations will be in turmoil, perplexed by the roaring seas and strange tides. The courage of many people will falter because of the fearful fate they see coming upon the earth, because the stability of the very heavens will be broken up. Then everyone will see the Son of Man arrive on the clouds with power and great glory. So when all these things begin to happen, stand straight and look up, for your salvation is near!" --Luke 21:25-28
For the Lord himself will come down from heaven with a commanding shout, with the call of the archangel, and with the trumpet call of God. First, all the Christians who have died will rise from their graves. Then, together with them, we who are still alive and remain on the earth will be caught up in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air and remain with him forever. --1 Thessalonians 4:16-17Comment
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Why do you tell me things that I have already figured out for myself?Originally posted by orange
Nope, I've simply gone mad
A lot of Republicans are not racist, but a lot of racists are Republican.Comment
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This is for my friend......Mr. Fun
The United Airline's passenger cabin was being served by an obviously gay flight attendant who seemed to put everyone into a good mood as he served them food and drinks. As the plane prepared to descend, he came down the aisle and announced to the passengers,
"Captain Marvey has asked me to announce that he'll be landing the big scary plane shortly, lovely people, so if you could just put up your trays that would be super." On his trip back up the aisle, he noticed that a well dressed, rather exotic looking woman hadn't moved a muscle.
"Perhaps you didn't hear me over those big brute engines. I asked you to raise your trazy-poo so the main man can pitty-pat us on the ground." She calmly turned her head and said,
"In my country, I am called a Princess. I take orders from no one." To which the flight attendant replied, without missing a beat,
"Well, sweet-cheeks, in my country, I'm called a Queen, so I outrank you. Put the tray up, Bitc*."
Welcome to earth, my name is Tia and I'll be your tour guide for this trip.
Succulent and Bejeweled Mother Goddess, who is always moisturised yet never greasy, always patient yet never suffers fools~Starchild
Dragons? Yup- big flying lizards with an attitude. ~ Laz
You are forgiven because you are FABULOUS ~ ImranComment
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