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Apolyton Bad Joke Theatre

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  • Apolyton Bad Joke Theatre

    One day, Dr. Frankenstein says to Igor, "I need two fresh bodies for my next experiment. Go down the mountain to the cemetary and dig up two fresh bodies!"

    So Igor grabs a shovel and a sack and starts shambling down the mountainside. Eventually, he reaches the cemetary at the bottom, and as he's scouting around for fresh graves, he hears a tremendous CRASH!

    He turns around and sees a fiery car wreck; apparently, some poor soul had crashed his car right into the mountain. As he walks to the wreck, he sees the silhouette of two people inside. "What a stroke of luck," he says to himself.

    He sees the body of a man in the driver's seat; he searches his pockets, and takes out his wallet, which identifies the man as John Hill. He pockets Mr. Hill's money and throws him in his sack. A woman is in the passenger seat; her identification reads "Marcy Hill." Igor pockets her money and throws her in the sack. He starts dragging the bodies back up the mountain.

    When he reaches the lab, Igor says, "I have two fresh bodies, Dr. Frankenstein!"

    "Excellent! Put them on the slab!" So Igor throws them on the slab. "Now throw the lever!" So Igor throws the lever, and lightning crackles around the room. "Now put on the music!" So Igor puts on the music, and the bodies start to move.

    Igor exclaims, "Dr. Frankenstein! The Hills are alive with the sound of music!"
    "My nation is the world, and my religion is to do good." --Thomas Paine
    "The subject of onanism is inexhaustable." --Sigmund Freud

  • #2
    *Guynemer is pelted with a barrage of fruits and vegetables*
    "I'm moving to the Left" - Lancer

    "I imagine the neighbors on your right are estatic." - Slowwhand

    Comment


    • #3
      Just what I was shooting for.
      "My nation is the world, and my religion is to do good." --Thomas Paine
      "The subject of onanism is inexhaustable." --Sigmund Freud

      Comment


      • #4
        ugh.

        *Theben throws rotten tomatos @ Guynemer*
        I'm consitently stupid- Japher
        I think that opinion in the United States is decidedly different from the rest of the world because we have a free press -- by free, I mean a virgorously presented right wing point of view on the air and available to all.- Ned

        Comment


        • #5
          long way to go...
          Haven't been here for ages....

          Comment


          • #6
            "Knock, knock"

            "Who's there?"

            "Interrupting cow"

            "Interrupt....."

            "MOO! MOO! MOO! MOO!"
            The genesis of the "evil Finn" concept- Evil, evil Finland

            Comment


            • #7
              That's your best literary piece to date, Laz.
              I'm consitently stupid- Japher
              I think that opinion in the United States is decidedly different from the rest of the world because we have a free press -- by free, I mean a virgorously presented right wing point of view on the air and available to all.- Ned

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by Shogun Gunner
                long way to go...
                Bah. That's nothing.


                C'mon, folks, Laz has got the spirit. This is Apolyton Bad Joke Theatre. Everyone is supposed to participate.
                "My nation is the world, and my religion is to do good." --Thomas Paine
                "The subject of onanism is inexhaustable." --Sigmund Freud

                Comment


                • #9
                  Japanese women's favorite holiday?











                  Erection Day
                  Haven't been here for ages....

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Jesus walks into a hotel, slaps four big spikes down on the counter, and says "Can you put me up for the night?"

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Lazarus and the Gimp
                      "Knock, knock"

                      "Who's there?"

                      "Interrupting cow"

                      "Interrupt....."

                      "MOO! MOO! MOO! MOO!"
                      Mo...aww ****, I'm too late...
                      "I predict your ignore will rival Ben's" - Ecofarm
                      ^ The Poly equivalent of:
                      "I hope you can see this 'cause I'm [flipping you off] as hard as I can" - Ignignokt the Mooninite

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        There's a Finn, a Russian, and a Lithuanian in a car. Who's driving?
















                        The police.
                        The enemy cannot push a button if you disable his hand.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          What did 50 Cent say to his homeboy who gave him a sweater for Christmas?










                          "Gee, you knit?"
                          "I predict your ignore will rival Ben's" - Ecofarm
                          ^ The Poly equivalent of:
                          "I hope you can see this 'cause I'm [flipping you off] as hard as I can" - Ignignokt the Mooninite

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            What do you call a Scouser in a suit?

                            The accused.
                            "Paul Hanson, you should give Gibraltar back to the Spanish" - Paiktis, dramatically over-estimating my influence in diplomatic circles.

                            Eyewerks - you know you want to visit. No really, you do. Go on, click me.

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                            • #15
                              How can you tell when a Geordie lass has an orgasm?

                              She drops her chips.
                              Only feebs vote.

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