Christian-Creation Science Fair-Warning, I just hypoventalated from laughter

[Vesayen]

WARNING: May cause injury from excessive laughter

I CANNOT BELIEVE THIS IS REAL!!!!!!

http://objective.jesussave.us/creationsciencefair.html

[Vesayen]

1st Place: "Life Doesn't Come From Non-Life"
Patricia Lewis (grade 8) did an experiment to see if life can evolve from non-life. Patricia placed all the non-living ingredients of life - carbon (a charcoal briquet), purified water, and assorted minerals (a multi-vitamin) - into a sealed glass jar. The jar was left undisturbed, being exposed only to sunlight, for three weeks. (Patricia also prayed to God not to do anything miraculous during the course of the experiment, so as not to disqualify the findings.) No life evolved. This shows that life cannot come from non-life through natural processes.

2nd Place: "Women Were Designed For Homemaking"
Jonathan Goode (grade 7) applied findings from many fields of science to support his conclusion that God designed women for homemaking: physics shows that women have a lower center of gravity than men, making them more suited to carrying groceries and laundry baskets; biology shows that women were designed to carry un-born babies in their wombs and to feed born babies milk, making them the natural choice for child rearing; social sciences show that the wages for women workers are lower than for normal workers, meaning that they are unable to work as well and thus earn equal pay; and exegetics shows that God created Eve as a companion for Adam, not as a co-worker.

Honorable Mention:
"Mousetrap Reduced To Pile Of Functionless Parts" - Kevin Parker (grade 7)
"Dinosaur & Man Walked Together" - Donny Findlay (grade 6)
"Rocks Can't Evolve, Where Did They Come From Mr. Darwin?" - Anna Reed (grade 6)

[SlowwHand]

Uh, yeah.
I'm glad you're the one that's going to burn in Hell.
Don't worry. It will only feel like eternity.

[Az]

ROTFL>..........

Our children are the future face of Science and we must teach them to recognize the truth of the Word of the Lord so as to break the cycle of Evolutionism dogma that is paralyzing scientific development and making higher education a dumping ground for the excesses of materialistic philosophies.

1st Place: "My Uncle Is A Man Named Steve (Not A Monkey)"
Cassidy Turnbull (grade 5) presented her uncle, Steve. She also showed photographs of monkeys and invited fairgoers to note the differences between her uncle and the monkeys. She tried to feed her uncle bananas, but he declined to eat them. Cassidy has conclusively shown that her uncle is no monkey.

*chokes*

[DAVOUT]

I am not sure it is funny... unless they are only a very small number.

[Vesayen]

I warned you! *keeps over laughing*

[Az]

oh, wait, wait, THIS is rich...

Honorable Mention:
"God Made Kitty" - Sally Reister (grade 3)
"The Bible Says Creation" - Aaron Kent (grade 5)
"Pokemon Prove Evolutionism Is False" - Paul Sanborn (grade 4)

[Vesayen]

I cant believe the moron incharge has the balls to call himself a "scientist"....

"Patricia Lewis displays her jar of non-living material, still non-living after three weeks. "

LOL GREAT JOB PATRICIA YOU WATCHED A ROCK REMAIN A ROCK

[mrmitchell]

[Kirnwaffen]

'Alright kids, time to go out there and parade your ignorance of evolutionary theory. Make me proud.'

[Sava]

oh my god....
(no pun intended)

[reds4ever]

Funniest thing I've read in a long time

"Rocks Can't Evolve, Where Did They Come From Mr. Darwin?" - Anna Reed (grade 6)

Evolutionary theory smashed in a sentence!

[Sava]

The parents of these children should be arrested for child abuse... keeping children this ignorant is cruel.

[Dinner]

I blame the parents who are to stupid to understand even the most basic levels of science. How can children learn when their parents fill their minds with garbage like this? Why does religion seem to suck all of the intelligence out of so many people?

[Sava]

Why does religion seem to suck all of the intelligence out of so many people?

Do not eat from the tree of knowledge.