What's A Man To Do?

[SlowwHand]

If you put a woman on a pedestal and try to protect her from the rat race...you're a male chauvinist.

If you stay home and do the housework...you're a pansy.

If you work too hard...there's never any time for her.

If you don't work enough...you're a good-for-nothing bum.

If she has a boring repetitive job with low pay...this is exploitation.

If you have a boring repetitive job with low pay.....you should get off
your lazy behind and find something better.

If you get a promotion ahead of her.....that is favoritism.

If she gets a job ahead of you......it's equal opportunity.

If you mention how nice she looks......it's sexual harassment.

If you keep quiet..........it's male indifference.

If you cry............you're a wimp.

If you don't....................you're an insensitive bastard.

If you make a decision without consulting her.........you're a chauvinist.

If she makes a decision without consulting you......she's a liberated
woman.

If you ask her to do something she doesn't enjoy....... that's domination.

If SHE asks you.........it's a favor.

If you appreciate the female form and frilly underwear......you're a pervert.

If you don't..............you're gay.

If you like a woman to shave her legs and keep in shape..............you're sexist.

If you don't.................you're unromantic.

If you try to keep yourself in shape................you're vain.

If you don't................you're a slob.

If you buy her flowers.............you're after something.

If you don't....................you're not thoughtful.

If you're proud of your achievements........you're full of yourself.

If you don't....................you're not ambitious.

If she has a headache............she's tired.

If you have a headache.............you don't love her anymore.

If you want it too often.........you're oversexed.

If you don't................there must be someone else.


Men die first because they want to!!!

[Alexander's Horse]

Yes but how is your prostate?

[MichaeltheGreat]

Anything going on we should know about, Tex?

[red_jon]

It depends if you want to appeal to the hairy legged feminists or the beer swilling chauvanists.

[SlowwHand]

Actually, this is from Boann.
Any guys out there, that want an honest woman, I have just the one for you.

[st_swithin]

Did ya buy her on eBay?

;D

[Japher]

If you buy her flowers.............you're after something.

If you don't....................you're not thoughtful.

So true... I get that about once every two-three months.

[red_jon]

If you're that worried about being branded gay then you're not really that sure of your masculinity.

[Japher]

What's a man to do? Take full advantage of these:


If she sleeps around..............she's a slut

If he sleeps around................he's a stud

If she dresses up....................she's just going out

If he dresses up......................somebody died

If she gets way too drunk in public..........she's easy

If he gets way too drunk in public..............he's a partier

If she watches sports..............................she's a tom boy

If he watches sports................................he's straight

If she wears a lot of jewelry................she has sugar daddy

If he wears a lot of jewelry...................he's a sugar daddy

If she is a little cranky...........................it's around that time

If he is a little cranky............................the Bear's lost, again

If she gets strip-searched at the airport........it's embaressing

If he gets strip-searched at the airport........it's a moment of self discovery

If she is a boss.....................................she's bossy

If he is a boss.......................................everyon e buys him mugs saying "Boss"

If she watches NASCAR........................she is a hillbilly

If he watches NASCAR..........................he is a redneck


It ain't about dying first, it's about getting their comfortably

[LTEC!]

[Sava]

If she watches NASCAR........................she is a hillbilly

If he watches NASCAR..........................he is a redneck

This is true though...

[SlowwHand]

What's the deal about NASCAR? A preference for CART?

[Immortal Wombat]

If you can't get it right..... you need more practise.

[Sava]

Originally posted by SlowwHand
What's the deal about NASCAR? A preference for CART?

Nah, I don't like racing that much. My stereotypes are based upon other people's stereotypes, and my own observations of crackers driving around with NASCAR stickers on their pickup trucks.

To be honest, I find auto-racing quite intriguing. I'm a fan of technology, cars, machines, etc... As for NASCAR, it's kind of lame because it's just one big circle. Maybe if they raced across country or something, I'd give a crap.

[Japher]

The road tracks are fun... Yet, I agree, I am not much into left-turn-contests, but the mechanics of it all is stunning