Warrant

[Ninot]

Hernan, i dont give two squids (shudder) what your mind posseses, if anything at all. That you think I am a child doesnt disturb me at all.

You have offered me peace. But only after offering Davout testimony that i was leaving town. You offer me peace now, but down the line, you will offer a knife to my back again. That I cannot allow.

You have insulted me.

But Spain does not mourn me. I work for Spain, and it reaps the benefits. However, Spain does cringe when you wake up every morning.

[History Guy]

Young man, I do not think you understood me. You are unworthy of any dignified response.

Henceforth, whatever you say I will ignore. It matters not the scattered opinions you put forward, and I will not treat your words as worthy of any response, for surely they are not. To my mind, for now, you do not exist. Do not expect me to respond to your babbling ever again, young man, for children are better seen and not heard.

Hernan de History Guy Calamari the Younger

[Ninot]

Hah, you are an old fat fool. A cowardly old fat fool whos face resembles that of the ugly squid which he sells.

You will plug your ears and listen to your own breezy headed thoughts, before you will do an honorable thing.

I am glad you chose to ignore me. Now if only I could so expertisely choose to plug my ears, and sing:

"lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala"

if only i could do that to the skill of which you do, maybe then, I could no longer be a child.

[pikesfan]

SPLUUUHSH! The rather disgusting contents of a chamber pot [high-quality squid was had for lunch ] pour out oh-so-near the two duelists, but just far enough away not to touch them or their clothes.

A window opens. Maria Pikesfan looks out:

--DO YOU MIND! I’m trying to teach some etiquette here and can’t hear myself think! Would you two little boys, no I mean big boys go somewhere else? I expect better from my 12-year-old nephew Lluís! And next time I won’t miss.

[pikesfan]

And just making the whole thing even more ridiculous, a frighteningly large pair of buttocks (not belonging, by the way, to anyone in the Pikesfan clan, but to some rather low-class neighbours who, even if they could afford etiquette classes would not even understand why such are necessary, and hence are a constant annoyance to the Pikesfans) appear out the upper story window of the residence across the street, and make the traditional noise, and not quietly either.

Squawks a woman’s voice: “I heard that! Go outside next time! And don’t eat your squid so fast and you won’t have to go outside!”
Grunts a man’s: “What do you mean, you heard that, woman! You can’t have heard that, there was nothing to hear! Anyway, there was so much noise outside with those two arguing you couldn’t have heard nowt!”
The woman’s: “They stopped.”
The man’s: “Oh. I hope it was two of those foofarahs who keep visiting that dangfool school across the street taught by those dangfool people who think they’re so high and mighty.”
The buttocks disappear and the window closes.

[Arnelos]

Señors Ninot and Calamari,

You're supposed to duel with weapons, not just continue sparring with words

[ooc]

This isn't the Monkey Island game series... you don't win the fight by making the better insults

[/ooc]

Since Señor Calamari was the challenger and Señor Ninot is the one accepting the duel, Señor Ninot has the choice of weapons.

Make your choice.

[History Guy]

Senor Clemente, I refuse to make duel with this man, now. I have no more business to do with him. I've satisfied myself that he is too childish to be taken seriously, and I will not murder so pitiful an individual.

Secondly, I also refuse because of the inane atmosphere with which this whole situation is dealt with. This is no gala affair. This is, or was, a private matter. A duel is an honorable thing. Duelists are not gladiators, they are not entertainers. It is a private affair.

I am, as I said, satisfied that Senor Ninot is too simple and childlike to understand the nature of what he was saying. I will forgive him this, like an elderly man forgives a toddler who steps on his foot and bangs at his knees without understanding that he is simply being obnoxious.

Hernan de History Guy Calamari the Younger

[mrmitchell]

[ooc]

Hamilton and Burr!
Hamilton and Burr!
Hamilton and Burr!

(great PR event to entertain the other teams )

[/ooc]

[Ninot]

Arnelos, see, we must all be fools

Hernan challenged me to a duel, thinking I would not accept.

Now that I have, it is not in his interests.

He never intended to get off his squid-bought stool. He rather just keep his closed-mind and his plush job.

[History Guy]

Ah, young man, you have learned grammar, have you not? Splendid thing...Writing brought it too us. Rather sweet chaps, those wise men, to thing of how we should phrase things so that they are understandable.

Why then, do you suggest that I formally challenged you to a duel when I never did?

Take a look. "If you were any part of a man [sorry for that...blood was up], I'd challenge you to a duel." However, I did not officially do so.

However, if you want a chance to butcher an old man, if that reeeeally pleases you, feel free to sneak up on a dark and stormy night, or just challenge me upright.

Yet, I don't see the need for a duel, nor, I think, do you. So let us drop it and be peaceable men. I shall not trouble you, if you do not trouble me. So I have spoken.

Hernan de History Guy Calamari the Younger

[Ninot]

Originally posted by History Guy
So let us drop it and be peaceable men. I shall not trouble you, if you do not trouble me.

This has not proved true in the past . I never knocked on your door to beg you to report me to DaAVOUT, when I did nothing wrong.

Why should I believe you will be less cowardly in the future?

[mrmitchell]

Although these disputes are part of the fabric of Spain, the Calamari family seems to be the cause of many of them.

Just to point it out.

---
Heh, no new news in the Case...

[pikesfan]

I think the “air” let out by that monstrous pair of buttocks must have had something to do with this sudden desire for peace

You can tell we have problems with those neighbours :yuck: [we need a yuck smiley]

[Ninot]

Originally posted by pikesfan
I think the “air” let out by that monstrous pair of buttocks must have had something to do with this sudden desire for peace

You can tell we have problems with those neighbours :yuck: [we need a yuck smiley]

[mrmitchell]

In the thread, GeneralTacticus commented about the need for this to go quickly.

When we release it as a PR event we can talk about how long and delayed it was through all of the witnesses who were (if Ninot wins) helping a good friend or some crap like that or (if Ninot loses) involved in such a vast conspiracy to overthrow Grand Despot Togas.