I want to be civilized

**Pekka** · July 10, 2005, 10:56

YEAh.. so that I can carry myself in future events like a pro. OK first let's start with what we need.. I mean what I need. What do you guys think? I list few things... let's first list things and then start detailing after that.

Wines. I need to learn about wines. I know nothing about wines except there's red and white. I had this excellent red wine few weeks ago and it changed my world into 'hey.. I really do like wine after all'. So I need to be pro at this. Not TOO pro, you knwo the type that spits it afterwards, but I need to knwo my wines like a pro so that I can enjoy it more and that I can impress with my mad skillz.

**General Ludd** · July 10, 2005, 11:03

When ever you order a wine, send atleast one bottle back after tasting it. If there is stuff floating around at the bottom of the bottle, make an issue of it. Then you'll look like a pro.

**Pekka** · July 10, 2005, 11:08

No I said I want to be pro, not *******

..

You see, I filled up my profile to the internet.. like dating thing, and I searched the ones that matched me best, and it was weird. It was 85% weirdos and TRUE FREAKS. I mean the girls that might cut your bits off when you sleep. Really scary types.. mostly goths, satan worshippers, psychos and nutties. And then 15% were absolute super beauties, like classic beauties, with super degrees and super income and super sexy smart types. Really weird, I got like zero normal girls.

So I want to skip the freaks and get to the super. So I found out that they were all civilized and **** so I need to be too if I ever go out to date them.

**SlowwHand** · July 10, 2005, 11:14

Who gives a damn about wine? Real tough. Red with beef and white with white meats and be done with it.
Concentrate on things like not drooling on yourself.

**Pekka** · July 10, 2005, 11:15

haha that might be too much to ask though.. the drooling part

.

Yeah but I thought the same until few weeks ago I had wine that.. well I just think I should look more into it. Not to mention it'll go well with the high class babes I'm about to save from the cruel world of stupid men.

**Zkribbler** · July 10, 2005, 13:36

Wines are a good start. They give you class:

Originally posted by SlowwHand
Who gives a damn about wine? Real tough. Red with beef and white with white meats and be done with it.

And with in between stuff, like spaghetti, choose a rose.

Always look down your nose at chablis and vin rose.

Some stuff your mom tried to teach you but couldn't:
(1) Don't swear. (That's a lot harder than it sounds.) Profanity and class do not mix.

(2) Good posture. Look at Governor Schwartenegger. No matter how many bad things you can say about him, you can't fault his posture.

Attitude:
Thoreau said, "Every man is my superior in some way. And from that, I learn." Thoreau is one of America's most famed philophers. If he looks to everyone as a source of learning, so can you.

Finally, belt your pants up around your waist, not over your hips. Civilized guys wear their pants high...no, I don't know why.

**Spiffor** · July 10, 2005, 18:46

If you date somebody who is used to "civilized" habits, you should avoid faking your own "civilized"-ness. An adept will always, always spot the newbie who tries too hard, no matter the topic*

*this applies to absolutely any kind of practice. An adept computer nerd will spot it if you try too hard to fake computer-nerdness. An adept construction worker will spot it if you want to impress him and try to look as a 1337 construction worker. Anybody who has some genuine knowledge of wine, fine arts, or anything, will immediately spot that it's not natural for you, and that you're trying to impress.

**Immortal Wombat** · July 10, 2005, 19:07

Originally posted by Spiffor
An adept will always, always spot the newbie who tries too hard, no matter the topic*

QFT.

Casually mentioning something you know a little about when the conversation is going the other way makes it seem like you know a lot more without having to go into detail. Appearing reluctant to boast about hidden depths of knowledge is often far cooler than having them.

**Lawrence of Arabia** · July 10, 2005, 19:08

this is the guy who couldnt pick up a phone and call a girl? and he wants to learn how to distinguish wines so he can impress. but who is he gonna impress?

**Provost Harrison** · July 10, 2005, 19:13

Perhaps you could learn from Jilly Goulden

**reds4ever** · July 10, 2005, 19:18

Originally posted by Zkribbler

Thoreau is one of America's most famed philophers.

The expression 'damning with faint praise' springs to mind

**JohnT** · July 10, 2005, 21:38

Do you have manners? Knowing about wine isn't going to convince anyone that you're civilized when you hush the crowd with a "Goddamn, this is one tall drink of ********er!"

**Zkribbler** · July 10, 2005, 21:45

Egad, there's never a string of asterisks around when you need them.

**DerSchwarzfalke** · July 10, 2005, 23:57

I hope this newfound interest in wine isn't because you just watched Sideways.

**Pekka** · July 11, 2005, 00:39

NO NO and NO. I said I first got the interest after actually liking red wine I had. I only rambled about the internet dating thing later on. I want to be able to possibly enjoy more of the wine world. That's it.

Who do you take me for anyway, I have manners, I don't swear in front of strangers or when I have to be respectable anyway. It's not like it's difficult for me not to swear. I normally do not swear, not a single word.

And now you all go 'ohh but why do you want to act someone else just to impress some girl and she'll find out you're a fake'.. guys, it sounds like you're projecting your own fears or experiences or something. I don't know what you are even talking about. It's only a plus benefit that some classy girls might also like wine, there's nothing wrong knowing about wines adn then impressing someone with the knowledge. What's fake about that, it's not a trick I want to learn so I can hit the sack with some chick. I want to learn it even if there was no chicks, period.

But I guess the girls weren't so impressed with the nunchuck skills, guys? ****.. come on give me a break.

And no, I didn't get my only interest because I saw Sideways, which I did see by the way. I liked the movie.

**Kidicious** · July 11, 2005, 02:31

**** wine. It sucks.

**Spiffor** · July 11, 2005, 07:43

Originally posted by Pekka
And now you all go 'ohh but why do you want to act someone else just to impress some girl and she'll find out you're a fake'.. guys, it sounds like you're projecting your own fears or experiences or something. I don't know what you are even talking about. It's only a plus benefit that some classy girls might also like wine, there's nothing wrong knowing about wines adn then impressing someone with the knowledge. What's fake about that, it's not a trick I want to learn so I can hit the sack with some chick. I want to learn it even if there was no chicks, period.

Oh, that's different then. I thought your willingness to become civilized was goal-oriented (specifically, I thought you only aimed at impressing girls).

I strongly suggest you to continue sampling wines, tasting a variety of them, and if your memory is as spotty as mine, write down the names of the wines you enjoy the most.

A formal knowledge of wine is not necessary at all to appreciate it. It can add to the enjoyment only for some people, not for most. If you get to drink often and to drink varied wines, you'll have no problem.

**SlowwHand** · July 11, 2005, 09:58

No one will know if you have proper wine if you'll just leave it in paper bag and drink from it.

**DeathByTheSword** · July 11, 2005, 10:11

drink a lot of different ones...and if you want to impress go and try wines NOT from france...but from Oz and south-africa not only does it makes you look different but they are getting pretty good the last couple of years...although the best wines are still coming from france...

oh and quickly:

red wine = for guys and girls

sweet white wine = for girls

dry white wine = for guys and also girls but only for guys if the food is ok with it (certain fishes and whie meat)

rose = only ok for guys on warm days and BQQ

**General Ludd** · July 11, 2005, 10:25

I don't want to know what you do with the wine that makes it gender-specific.

**DeathByTheSword** · July 11, 2005, 10:31

wines are alive as thus have there own preference to whom shall drink them...

nah...it is of course just an opinion but after drinking quite some wine the last year i think this is for me and almost everybody i know a good division

**DAVOUT** · July 11, 2005, 10:50

Becoming civilized requires a long effort; I have tried for 66 years and I hope only that my grandchildren will display a veneer of civilization. Cheer up, man!

**Spiffor** · July 11, 2005, 10:51

Pekka:

In order to get started, here are a few ruloes of thumbs:

You can have wine during a meal, or you can drink wine without a meal. These are different experiences. During a meal, the taste of the dish interferes with the taste of the wine, sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worse. In order for you to discover new wines, it may be better that you drink them without a meal.

Taste is the most important thing that makes a wine enjoyable, but it's not the only one. Smell, texture and colour can be pleasant as well.
Personally, I'm smell-sensitive when it comes to wines, and there are plenty of wines whose smell I preferred over their taste.
It may seem stupid to think about how the wine looks, but it's not entirely unimmportant. Just like a nice-looking dish makes the meal more enjoyable, a good-looking wine can be eye candy.
Texture is quite important. Not as important as taste, naturally, but intertwined with it nonetheless. A delicate texture that runs through your mouth like fresh torrent water will probably feel more pleasant than an oily texture

This may sounds snob, but it is only snobbish if you want it to be. Fundamentally, anybody enjoys eye candy. Anybody enjoys a nice smell. Anybody enjoys a good texture. Wine has the ability to please your senses, all of them (save hearing), and not just taste. The snobs aren't the only ones who have 5 senses

**DeathByTheSword** · July 11, 2005, 11:01

texture...never really noticed that...or do you mean e.i. the difference between sweet and dry white wine?

**Pekka** · July 11, 2005, 11:23

DAVOUT, no really? Are you 66 years old? I thought you were like.. 20 to 30.. now I have to watch my mouth more carefully

.. this is your fault!

Good stuff guys!

**DAVOUT** · July 11, 2005, 12:12

Originally posted by Pekka
DAVOUT, no really? Are you 66 years old? I thought you were like.. 20 to 30.. now I have to watch my mouth more carefully

.. this is your fault!

Good stuff guys!

Please speak freely as usual

I am coming on Apolyton only for listening to young terrians discussing the problems of the planet.

**Pekka** · July 11, 2005, 12:22

yeah but I've been stupid and it's kind of embarrasing to find out the person you were being stupid to was someone you should have shown more respect than that. Well just for the record, I usually never mean the bad things I say, at least not about other posters

**Zoid** · July 11, 2005, 12:23

Originally posted by Spiffor
Pekka:

In order to get started, here are a few ruloes of thumbs:

You can have wine during a meal, or you can drink wine without a meal. These are different experiences. During a meal, the taste of the dish interferes with the taste of the wine, sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worse. In order for you to discover new wines, it may be better that you drink them without a meal.

Taste is the most important thing that makes a wine enjoyable, but it's not the only one. Smell, texture and colour can be pleasant as well.
Personally, I'm smell-sensitive when it comes to wines, and there are plenty of wines whose smell I preferred over their taste.
It may seem stupid to think about how the wine looks, but it's not entirely unimmportant. Just like a nice-looking dish makes the meal more enjoyable, a good-looking wine can be eye candy.
Texture is quite important. Not as important as taste, naturally, but intertwined with it nonetheless. A delicate texture that runs through your mouth like fresh torrent water will probably feel more pleasant than an oily texture

This may sounds snob, but it is only snobbish if you want it to be. Fundamentally, anybody enjoys eye candy. Anybody enjoys a nice smell. Anybody enjoys a good texture. Wine has the ability to please your senses, all of them (save hearing), and not just taste. The snobs aren't the only ones who have 5 senses

Word! I just discovered the wonderful world of wine myself a few months ago. And I´m on my way to become a real connoisseur

**Pekka** · July 11, 2005, 12:31

Zoidberg, yes but you're only a hack trying to impress girls with tricks plus you prolly just saw Sideways so.. you're definitely a bad person. ...

**SlowwHand** · July 11, 2005, 12:32

Why don't you pass that train of thought around, Pekka?
Maybe the "know-it-all" 19 year olds will take a cue.

Thread: I want to be civilized

Thread Tools

I want to be civilized

Similar Threads

Why is Canada more civilized than the USA?

Iowa becomes a tad more civilized.

Barbarians become civilized?

Get Civilized

Barbarians become civilized?

Visitors found this page by searching for:

Bookmarks

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions