In-House Preview Online: Part 3

[kalbear]

I was happy about this preview if only because of the audio clip, which makes me want this game and want to see the harvesters more and more. That really sets up the game, in my mind - it seems more and more likely that the main 'plot' is all about the Ithkul.

And that's damn cool.

Also, I like that the story elements are in the (for lack of a better term) civilopedia. That was the first time I had seen the encyclopedia at all, and it looks pretty nice.

Finally, I liked the hinting of 'oops, I screwed up' - though I think that it would have been better suited to say how you screwed up now, and save the other details for later.

Oh yeah, for those of you who are playing at home - the strat guide has covered most of this stuff. From what I've seen so far, there's absolutely nothing changed from this preview and the strat guide info. Therefore, it seems as if the strat guide is likely still very accurate when it comes to details.

[niteshade6]

I didn't mind the content so much as the writing. The content was kind of dry, but at least there was some new stuff there. The writing unfortunately makes the last preview look like shakespeare. But as I said, Dan probably is still learning English.

If you haven't already, I do strongly recomend following alex frog's link. The discussion on the other forum is much more honest, and also quite amusing. There are also some good suggestions on how to condence the writing style to make it much more clear, although I get the sense the author isn't particularly open to criticism.

[Jack Frost]

"I've never seen a preview attacked like this one though. Usualy there is some debate, and some people defending it."

Thats because it is the worst computer game preview ever written. I mean that in all seriousness. It is the worst ever written. It should be shown as a model of 'what not to do' to anyone planning on writing reviews/previews or anything aimed at the general public.

[kalbear]

You've obviously never read some of Seanbaby's reviews of Nintendo Power reviewers. Those were far, FAR worse than this, especially since you paid for it. Or someone did.

Anyway, so long as there are more screenies and more things like sound clips - say something like, oh, I dunno, a ship combat movie next time - I'll be perfectly happy.

[Kc7mxo]

I think that if you consider this to be just part 3 of a six part preview, then it's a pretty good preview.

The real problem is that the moo public is in general rather bored with previews. We're thouroughly saturated with them.

What I think we would all like, is an AAR of Dan's first game. That'd probably go over pretty well.

[Calacorm]

The Most for the Least

My comment to Dan is for him to write more substance into the previews. You could have covered far more information on High Level Menus then you did in 6 pages.

My suggestion: since you seem to have a space restriction on the size of the preview try to stick to the facts and stay away from embellishment, tangents, and other ideas not relevant to the topic. This gives us Moo3 fans more Meat, if you will, to digest with our eyes, and it gives the new Moo3 fans a better and less confusing idea of the game. Assuming the grammar doesn't offend anyone .
A Quick Example: The first few sentences in the second paragraph are a good example of what should be left out of the preview and replaced with Solid Game Information!
Keep in mind that I do not suggest changing style of writing but rather just keep that style and fact balance in check.

Your previews seem to be the only new news on Moo3 these days, and all fans will appreciate you making those previews the best they can be. (At least it should be new news; with in NDA limits of course )

One final point to make is that MOO fans are on the red line with anticipation for this game and you’re the only preview in town that is coming to visit on a regular, yet long, 1-week basis. I think that fact alone is setting you up for Flak from the readers. You'll handle it though.

The Most for the Least - More Facts Less Cheese

[etoon]

Hoard your treasury hostage from would-be financiers by selecting the 'Savings' option, or burn a whole in your imperial pocket by choosing to go the 'Spending' way.

You can either hoard your treasury by selecting the 'Savings' option, or you can hold your treasury hostage from would-be financiers by selecting the 'Savings' option. Picking either one is fine. I would suggest the first because it is shorter. The other problem with the sentence is that you used whole instead of hole. I just thought I'd point this out in case you make corrections.

[niteshade6]

"I think that if you consider this to be just part 3 of a six part preview, then it's a pretty good preview. "

I'm not quite sure how the fact that it's part 3 of 6 has any bearing on the writing quality.

[MarkG]

May I make the suggestion that Dan write up the rest of the reveiws and post them in the next few days.

would you sit down to read a 30-page preview, from start to finish?

If -everyone- bashes him on this forum then maybe we will see reform.

how about a mob?

The real problem is that the moo public is in general rather bored with previews.

not everyone has been on the moo forums for the last three years. if someone is bored of previews he should not read any (wow!)

[mactbone]

Isn't Dan Canadian - implying English is his first language?

Anyways, the writing is the kind reserved for academics. It's the way I would write a dispassionate paper to a Prof. I don't think it's horrible and I think it's more the way a professional publication would like it. Most fans however are more interested in Dan telling them all the little details and how to play the game - which are both more informal and not part of previews.

Also, I took a review writing course and the big thing was to "SHOW" everything. Your audience isn't right next to you watching you point out all the cool things - it can't even see what you're seeing, so by describing those things he is following established guidelines.

Lastly, I want to remind everyone that Dan isn't getting monetary compensation AFAIK and so I wouldn't exactly be expecting the best preview ever.

[Zero_Washu]

Lets be frank here.

First, the biggest problem with the "preview" is that the author hasn't played previous MOO games so he doesn't know what is important to the fans of the series.

Combined with his incessant need to over-word every single possible item, it is enough to drive you batty. Want a perfect example of his failure to SHUT UP ALREADY?

Page six, "BRIEFLY BACK TO THE 'MAIN SCREEN`: A SUGGESTION "

What part of BRIEFLY doesn't he understand?


That basically sums it up, he isn't to the point. He drones on and on about something that the screenshots describe quicker.

Its almost as if he is trying to make some artificial word count, or worse yet, ad count.


As for the tone expressed here compared to IGMOO, that was easy to figure out.

[Kc7mxo]

not everyone has been on the moo forums for the last three years. if someone is bored of previews he should not read any (wow!)

Ahh, but they are also desperate for content. . .

In the same way, I'm sure many people have started playing moo2 again. I'm simply putting forward an opinion as to why people have become so critical of any and all previews lately.

[niteshade6]

"Isn't Dan Canadian - implying English is his first language?"

Not necesarily. Some parts of Canada speak French as their primary language. I simply refuse to believe that anybody with English as their primary language could write as badly as that. Also remember that just because you live in Canada doesn't mean you were born here. Certainly there are quite a few people living in America who don't speak English as their primary language.

"Anyways, the writing is the kind reserved for academics. "

Well.....academics usualy write extremely well, even if their writing tends to be dry. So I have a hard time comparing it to academic writing.

"Lastly, I want to remind everyone that Dan isn't getting monetary compensation AFAIK and so I wouldn't exactly be expecting the best preview ever."

Well he did get an early copy of MoO3 in exhange for writing the review. I'm sure there are thousands of people who would have loved to be in his shoes. So it's not like he wasn't compensated for it.

[Darkrenown]

Originally posted by Iron Giant
The game looks to be about as interesting as doing your taxes in a glorified spreadsheet.

Where is the combat? Where are the grand battles that allow me to force my will on other races?

I don't get any feel for the scope of this game.

Am I an accountant trying to balance my company books or the Leader of a Galactic Empire?

I can see why you would think that from reading these previews but Moo3 has plenty of fleet battles, ground combat and big honking explosions.

@ Dan Q: Thanks for the screenshots and sound clip but that was a horribly written preview

[Jack Frost]

Ok.

I re-read the third installment of the preview after I've had my coffee and really woken up. This is my take on it:

Its actually better then the second. Although it is painfully dry, and poorly written, it IS more informative. I thought the regional zoning thing was -really- interesting, it sort of seems to be basicly a "min-maxer" slider. Either play balanced, or play to an extreme. It sounds cool...

"If your race is completely dependent on others for support in some societal aspect, or otherwise could not make-up the loss domestically"

so you can import/export food or minerals from other races?


The bottom line problems with this preview are two.

A) I was mistaken in thinking a 'lack of content' was the problem, as the real problem is the perspective of the reviewer. Instead of focusing on the game itself, and the UI as something one uses to manipulate the game, he believes that the UI is the game. So by describing each menu in isolation he believes that he is telling the player everything that they can do in the game.

Its the same as the races and modifiers in the first couple previews, it believes that by saying what stat changes each thing gives and offering charts and **** you are communicating to the reader the extent by which you can create a custom race.

This is not true.

B) the style is bad.

The answer and solution to problem A is difficult, and I believe that it comes down to this:

Dan didn't have the time, or choose to devote the time required to really answer the questions we would want answered. In other words, I want to know how every decision would affect game play, how every slider effects the AI, and a mass of details about the range of control you as a player have on your empire in realistic terms. But answering that question would probably require a good number of games, and therefore a great deal of time. It doesn't sound like he has the time to spend really playing, really finding the boundries, and really giving us insight into the game. So what we end up getting is a guided tour through the screen shots.

This can't be helped unless Dan gives the preview to someone else, which at this point won't happen.

FORTIONATLY the answer to problem B is more easily solved:

Have dan hand off a copy of his preview to someone else a couple days before it needs to go up. This person could review and edit it, or simply offer suggestions.

That person would check for glaring errors, and also help with the removal of unnessecary phrases (i wont bother pasting one, we all know they are all over).

This would result in a better more readable preview.

So please, try to get someone to do editing for you. Explain to them the complaints of the community, and have them remove the excess, and simplify the wording.