NFL - Are You Ready For Some Football?! - Off Season

[Al B. Sure!]

Only my beloved Lions could have a net positive scoring differential and have one of the absolute worst records in the league.

The Chargers, too.

It won't get much better either, Guy... Wait til Stafford starts sucking it up when he comes back.

[MRT144]

The Chargers, too.

It won't get much better either, Guy... Wait til Stafford starts sucking it up when he comes back.

Doubt it. The Lions are a decent team that have had terrible luck.

[Al B. Sure!]

Well, the Lions still have the Jets, Patroits, and Dolphins on the slate as well as their divisional rivals... prospects aren't looking so good...

It'll be cool in a couple weeks to see Sanchez way outplay Stafford and with Tampa still on Detroit's schedule, I'm sure the other QB taken in the 1st round last year, Josh Freeman, will also look a lot better than that bum Stafford.

[-Jrabbit]

The guy's been injured since when, Week 1, and you still can't think of anything better to post than ragging on Stafford?
What is this obsession of yours?

[Al B. Sure!]

The guy's been injured since when, Week 1, and you still can't think of anything better to post than ragging on Stafford?
What is this obsession of yours?

Well to be honest, it's partially because Sloww is so high on him

But seriously, though. Stafford will be a bum. Sanchez and Freeman will have better careers. I'd be surprised if Stafford turns out to be good. He's also injury-prone. Crap, Stafford's played 11 games, Sanchez has played 24 games, and Freeman's played 16. I mean really, the guy can't even stay on the field and he's expected to be good? When was the last time a star QB missed so much time* his first 2 years in the league? But that's par the course for all the bums like Grossman, Couch, and others.


*time due to injury. Sitting on the bench and learning is great but Qb's who did that were healthy and could get all their practice reps in. Stafford couldn't even practice.

[-Jrabbit]

So you try to annoy Sloww by posting smack about Stafford when responding to posts from Guynemer and MRT that did not even mention Stafford?

Uh, OK.

[MRT144]

Here's the thing about the lions. Yes, they have 3 games which are going to be tough but their divisional games are a tossup, and they play buffalo and dallas. They're coming off their bye week and they have a great vertical game. Really, they have been unfortunate in losing close games.

[Al B. Sure!]

Buffalo is no sure-win for Detroit Not after what happened on Sunday.

[Imran Siddiqui]

So you try to annoy Sloww by posting smack about Stafford when responding to posts from Guynemer and MRT that did not even mention Stafford?

Uh, OK.

Uh, yeah! Annoy Slow as much as possible .

[-Jrabbit]

I really don't think it takes that much effort.

[MRT144]

Buffalo is no sure-win for Detroit Not after what happened on Sunday.

I think they're more than a toss up and nothing I said would indicate they are a sure-win.

[-Jrabbit]

Absolutely awesome article from a disgruntled Viking fan on Deadspin...

Brett Favre Is A B1tch

I'm a Vikings fan, so I apologize in advance for any and all homerism contained within this rant. But my team lost last night because our QB is a ****ing b1tch.

I know that Brett Favre has started four zillion straight games. We only hear about it going in and out of every f*cking commercial break. I couldn't start that many games in a row (or even one) and remain intact, and I'm well aware of that fact. BUT HOLY F*CKING **** DOES GIMPY MCDEERSTAND MILK EVERY GODDAMN DRIP OUT OF THAT F*CKING RECORD.

No one has ever gotten more mileage out of his nagging injuries than this *******. It all started last night when Favre got dragged down on a play and ran over to the sidelines hobbling on "the ankle." Al Michaels spoke repeatedly of "the ankle," because you, the viewer, should be on a f*cking first-name basis with all of the Land Baron's injuries by now.

Then they cut to Favre on the sidelines staring at game stills and waving off the trainer, and then Al threw it down to Andrea Fakelashes and she was like, "Brett wouldn't talk to the trainers! HE'S SUCH A F*CKING TURBOSTUD DURRRRRR CREAMED PANTIES!" Then Favre went right back out onto the field and threw a goddamn pick, one of three last night, with surely more to come on his Charity Dick Six Farewell Tour. ****ing ****.

And what does Favre do after that pick? He hobbles off the field, of course. He hobbles openly, so that it can be noted by Al and Cris so that you, the viewer at home, understand that it was totally the ankle's fault. (Or Randy Moss's or Percy Harvin's. Normally, I really like Cris Collinsworth. But he bent over backward and kissed his own ******* last night to tell you that Moss and Harvin were out of position on two of those picks that were clearly bad decisions. Meanwhile, Collinsworth is CRUSHING Aaron Rodgers for missing out routes on the other side of the ball. Favre is like ****ing announcer kryptonite. He'll reduce even the best analyst to a slobbering idiot.) Favre has been pulling this sh1t for two decades now. He makes a sh1thead play, then grabs an assorted body part to let you know that yes, he threw that pick. BUT YOU'RE LUCKY HE'S EVEN OUT THERE, GUTTING ONE OUT FOR YOU.

And the announcers fall for this sh1t EVERY time. Every time. It's ridiculous. Especially when he looks fine five minutes later. Last night, I heard Al Michaels comment at least two times that "the elbow" looked great (again, first-name basis). They loooove telling you that Favre looks great throwing the ball despite an injury. NOTHING WRONG WITH THE ELBOW ON THAT PLAY! Favre wants to use the injury as an excuse when he ****s up, and then he wants the injury played up as icing to whatever futile catch-up TD he throws five minutes later. LOOK EVERYONE! IT'S A MIRACLE! HE'S STILL GOT SOME BULLETS LEFT IN THE GUN! HE'S BRAVER THAN ANNE FRANK! Look at the gumption he displayed hobbling out of his own press conference after his coach nailed him to the wall!

Remember: Favre is the guy who passed along photos of his bruised ankle (from the NFC title game) to the SNF crew before the season opener against New Orleans. He clearly wanted those photos shown on national TV just so you knew how courageous he had been for standing in harm's way. And so that, when he comes up gimpy after a fumble, you know precisely where to the lay the blame.

I'm sick of him trying to have it both ways. Are you hurt, you f*ck? Then come out of the goddamn game and let Tarvaris Jackson make a few surprising plays before inevitably reverting back to being Tarvaris Jackson. If you wanna stay in, quit relaying excuses to the suckers in the booth. Clearly, you're using the size of your f*cking cortisone shots to compensate for other things. I kept expecting Favre to grab his dick after a pick last night so Al could say, "Oop! Look at that! The Sterger controversy is clearly getting to him, Cris."

Any coach with half a nutsack would have benched that f*cker in the first half against the Jets. It's now at the point where I really hope Goodell suspends Favre, just so I don't have to watch him "gut out" another pick-laden choke job. Because I'm sick of seeing my team led by the toughest ***** around.

Awesome stuff.

http://m.deadspin.com/5672552/brett-favre-is-a-b*tch
(You'll have to type in the last word to link)

[Al B. Sure!]

That fan sounds like a ****ing douche. You really look like a Bears homer if you thought that curse-filled, ranting drivel is awesome.

But realistically, with a stress fracture, Favre really should sit out the game. The Vikings need to win this week to remain competitive and Favre does offer them the best chance, but not if he's hobbled. I think Tarvaris Jackson can handle that offense well enough to be competitive and really, Jackson is a better QB for Childress' Andy Reid-like system than Favre.

[Imran Siddiqui]

Al, that article WAS awesome!

[Al B. Sure!]

How so? It's a guy being an ******* whining about Brett Favre being an attention whore. Not only is that cliche and has been done for years now but it's nothing but whining. Favre is still the man.