Hello friends,
Classic question. Been going on lots of dates, and it seems to me there's always something "missing". I am trying to see if my expectations are too high. Then again, I'd rather be single than with someone just for the sake of being with someone.
So, I've not continued dating someone for reasons because
- They totally did not look like their pictures did. Not at all, or even close. It's not the disappointment in their looks, or lack of possible attraction (I find it to be more complex; like good sense of humour, attitude, brain and a smile will go a LONG way, if not all the way). It's the lie. It is like did you really think the would go unnoticed?
- smokers. I don't care if they just made new year's resolution but just had a relapse. It's still January.
- Swearing. I swear, I swear a lot but not when getting to know someone. There's a silent rule that you feel out their level of darkness. When you find the bottom and if it matches yours, good. if they just outright show it to you, they're trying to impress you with the wrong things. Plus it's not classy at all. Not assuming I'm OK with all the f bombs in the first five minutes. I'll go for those after several dates.
- hand shakes. It's not a business meeting. As I don't smell bad, look disgusting, or anything of that nature, it's OK to give a short hug. If you stab someone with a hand, it's a sign of no interest (which is OK), or some sort of severe issue, of sexual nature. I've found this to be true and have lost of empirical evidence.
- not comfortable with silence. Again, some sort of sexual problem, with the need for constant filling of the void. Needing the attention, or poor self esteem
- Poor self esteem. Often a sign of sexual problems or neglected as a child. If in therapy about it, it's good, a sign of self development.
- funky odors. Poor hygiene, often a result of poor lifestyle or mental health issues. Sometimes, though rarely, sexual problems.
- Checks out the phone more than once for no particular reason. No class.
- Makes no initiatives as to where to eat, have coffee, what movies to see, etc. Poor self esteem, is a pleaser far too much. Definitely neglect as a child or sexual trauma. Avoid but be compassionate.q
- Is in between jobs with no education, added with hundreds of instagram photos with Buddhist quotes. Most likely depressed.
I'd say this "negative" signs goes for men, too. So it's not women this or that. And all of this being said, most dates and women have been interesting,
To look for:
- nice genuine smile. Eyes also smile. Some people have such great smiles it just fills you with warmth.
- Just a nice person. Whereas "nice" can be mixed with avoid or boring, I prefer nice women. Nice, kind-hearted lady with a wide great smile, if it's real, that's 99 % for yours truly.
- Smart and dark sense of humour. Just to click with, we won't have chemistry without it but if we do, then all is good.
- If this all shows out, I will find them attractive and sexy. No amounts of physical attributes will ever replace personality and just someone who is nice.
What about you, what do you look in a partner and have you found yours?
Classic question. Been going on lots of dates, and it seems to me there's always something "missing". I am trying to see if my expectations are too high. Then again, I'd rather be single than with someone just for the sake of being with someone.
So, I've not continued dating someone for reasons because
- They totally did not look like their pictures did. Not at all, or even close. It's not the disappointment in their looks, or lack of possible attraction (I find it to be more complex; like good sense of humour, attitude, brain and a smile will go a LONG way, if not all the way). It's the lie. It is like did you really think the would go unnoticed?
- smokers. I don't care if they just made new year's resolution but just had a relapse. It's still January.
- Swearing. I swear, I swear a lot but not when getting to know someone. There's a silent rule that you feel out their level of darkness. When you find the bottom and if it matches yours, good. if they just outright show it to you, they're trying to impress you with the wrong things. Plus it's not classy at all. Not assuming I'm OK with all the f bombs in the first five minutes. I'll go for those after several dates.
- hand shakes. It's not a business meeting. As I don't smell bad, look disgusting, or anything of that nature, it's OK to give a short hug. If you stab someone with a hand, it's a sign of no interest (which is OK), or some sort of severe issue, of sexual nature. I've found this to be true and have lost of empirical evidence.
- not comfortable with silence. Again, some sort of sexual problem, with the need for constant filling of the void. Needing the attention, or poor self esteem
- Poor self esteem. Often a sign of sexual problems or neglected as a child. If in therapy about it, it's good, a sign of self development.
- funky odors. Poor hygiene, often a result of poor lifestyle or mental health issues. Sometimes, though rarely, sexual problems.
- Checks out the phone more than once for no particular reason. No class.
- Makes no initiatives as to where to eat, have coffee, what movies to see, etc. Poor self esteem, is a pleaser far too much. Definitely neglect as a child or sexual trauma. Avoid but be compassionate.q
- Is in between jobs with no education, added with hundreds of instagram photos with Buddhist quotes. Most likely depressed.
I'd say this "negative" signs goes for men, too. So it's not women this or that. And all of this being said, most dates and women have been interesting,
To look for:
- nice genuine smile. Eyes also smile. Some people have such great smiles it just fills you with warmth.
- Just a nice person. Whereas "nice" can be mixed with avoid or boring, I prefer nice women. Nice, kind-hearted lady with a wide great smile, if it's real, that's 99 % for yours truly.
- Smart and dark sense of humour. Just to click with, we won't have chemistry without it but if we do, then all is good.
- If this all shows out, I will find them attractive and sexy. No amounts of physical attributes will ever replace personality and just someone who is nice.
What about you, what do you look in a partner and have you found yours?
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