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My best friend Reggie related to me over dinner tonight about an incident he encountered on foursquare. For those who don't know, foursquare is an app/website where you check in at a location. People who are "friends" with you on foursquare can see where you check in and comment on it.
Reggie makes it a habit to check in to track places he goes to and enjoys. He and his wife eat out a lot. The "friends" he's made on foursquare are not anyone he's actually met--frequently complete strangers (anyone at the location where you check in can see when you do so) will add you as a friend, no actual interaction required. There was one guy here in the Portland area he had interacted with on the app, named "Phil W" They had exchanged comments on each other's check ins, always just asking how the place was and so forth. Absolutely nothing really personal was involved.
The other day, Reggie "checked in" at his own house when he got home from work. He often does this because his wife uses the app and he does that rather than sending her a text that he's home if she's somewhere else. A few minutes later, Reggie saw that Phil W had left a comment on his check in.
The comment was one word:
"******s"
Reggie was naturally stunned by this. One of the things about the app is that you know a lot of details about your "friends" on it. He knew that Phil W worked for Intel, and Reggie happens to have a ton of contacts there that he works with on a regular basis.
He thought a bit, and responded, "Dude, anyone on foursquare you know can see what you just wrote. I know you work on Intel. Is this really something you want people to see?"
After a few minutes, Phil W responded:
"Yup."
At this point Reggie had a dilemma. He was ****ing furious, shaking with anger over this. He was confident that he could show this to his Intel contacts and end this ****er's career. He knows enough people in the industry to make sure he doesn't get a job anywhere near it.
Yet, he simply unfriended Phil W on foursquare and left it at that. He's related this story to 5 people now, 3 men and 2 women. All three of the men (including me) said they would have sent this to Intel and taught the ******* a lesson. Both women said to drop it, it wasn't worth the potential escalation problems.
In the end, Reggie probably made the right call. We thought about the possibility that it was some douchebag acquaintance of Phil W's who got a hold of his phone and decided to play a joke, but that seems pretty unlikely to me. If that were the case and I was Phil W, once I saw what my friend had done, he would a) cease to be my friend, and b) I would make every effort to contact Reggie by any means I could to apologize and explain the situation. No such attempt had been made.
So, is it turn the other cheek? Or do you think there should be consequences for such ****ed up behavior?
Reggie makes it a habit to check in to track places he goes to and enjoys. He and his wife eat out a lot. The "friends" he's made on foursquare are not anyone he's actually met--frequently complete strangers (anyone at the location where you check in can see when you do so) will add you as a friend, no actual interaction required. There was one guy here in the Portland area he had interacted with on the app, named "Phil W" They had exchanged comments on each other's check ins, always just asking how the place was and so forth. Absolutely nothing really personal was involved.
The other day, Reggie "checked in" at his own house when he got home from work. He often does this because his wife uses the app and he does that rather than sending her a text that he's home if she's somewhere else. A few minutes later, Reggie saw that Phil W had left a comment on his check in.
The comment was one word:
"******s"
Reggie was naturally stunned by this. One of the things about the app is that you know a lot of details about your "friends" on it. He knew that Phil W worked for Intel, and Reggie happens to have a ton of contacts there that he works with on a regular basis.
He thought a bit, and responded, "Dude, anyone on foursquare you know can see what you just wrote. I know you work on Intel. Is this really something you want people to see?"
After a few minutes, Phil W responded:
"Yup."
At this point Reggie had a dilemma. He was ****ing furious, shaking with anger over this. He was confident that he could show this to his Intel contacts and end this ****er's career. He knows enough people in the industry to make sure he doesn't get a job anywhere near it.
Yet, he simply unfriended Phil W on foursquare and left it at that. He's related this story to 5 people now, 3 men and 2 women. All three of the men (including me) said they would have sent this to Intel and taught the ******* a lesson. Both women said to drop it, it wasn't worth the potential escalation problems.
In the end, Reggie probably made the right call. We thought about the possibility that it was some douchebag acquaintance of Phil W's who got a hold of his phone and decided to play a joke, but that seems pretty unlikely to me. If that were the case and I was Phil W, once I saw what my friend had done, he would a) cease to be my friend, and b) I would make every effort to contact Reggie by any means I could to apologize and explain the situation. No such attempt had been made.
So, is it turn the other cheek? Or do you think there should be consequences for such ****ed up behavior?
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(I have, and no, I don't expect you to be sympathetic. I wouldn't be. That would be stupid.)
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