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The 2012 Off Topic Celebrity Dead Pool

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  • Last day for late submissions.
    "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." - Clarence Darrow
    "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain

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    • I'm all set, right?
      Captain of Team Apolyton - ISDG 2012

      When I was younger I thought curfews were silly, but now as the daughter of a young woman, I appreciate them. - Rah

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      • Check the team lists - you're pending.

        No word from the embalmer. Either his power is out again or he's not interested.
        "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." - Clarence Darrow
        "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain

        Comment


        • I have submitted my list - hope you got it
          If at first you don't succeed, take the bloody hint and give up.

          Comment


          • Now all we need is someone to die.
            Try http://wordforge.net/index.php for discussion and debate.

            Comment


            • Originally posted by embalmer42 View Post
              I have submitted my list - hope you got it
              I did. You can't change the order but Tim Curry will be added in the the #20 spot.

              Originally posted by embalmer42 View Post
              Twenty little celebrities flying together in the skies
              All of them having fun, sure that none of them would die
              W. Axel Rose slapped someone for not treating him like a star
              The Grim Reaper slapped him back instead, now he's just ashes in a jar

              Nineteen little celebrities enjoying lying in the sun
              After working so hard all they wanted was to have a little fun
              Sonny Barger went to a concession stand where occurred a frightful scene
              Sonny stepped in a rat trap, and then they were just eighteen

              Eighteen Little celebrities went in a music store
              Most quickly got bored and left, but one needed to see much more
              Seeing all those guitars reminded him of the Canadian star he'd been
              When a guitar string snapped and decapitated him - now they numbered seventeen

              Seventeen little celebrities all gathered for a speech
              One of them stood up, they all knew how he liked to preach
              Fidel Castro opened his mouth, his skin the colour of green
              A bolt of lightning laid him flat, suddenly they were sixteen

              Sixteen little celebrities deciding to take a nap
              Two of them wanted the same bed and soon got into a scrap
              Fists were thrown, curses were uttered, though one was not so keen
              When all was over, Queen Elizabeth II was still, and so they were fifteen

              Fifteen little celebrities went strolling in a cave
              They'd packed a picnic lunch because all of them were so very brave
              One went missing and so the others looked because he'd never been very mean
              But no sign of Gordon Lightfoot could be found, which brought them to fourteen

              Fourteen little celebrities going out upon the town
              Spending lots of money and spreading it around
              One entered a bar and did not leave, though the others did not miss him so
              No tears were shed, it was said, when George H. W. Bush was next to go

              Thirteen little celebrities getting dressed up for a dance
              Only the biggest stars were invited, it was no time to take a chance
              Making sure that everything was perfect caused one of them too much stress
              Nancy Reagan failed to make the party, and so they were one less

              Twelve little celebrities all jumping from a plane
              Parachutes were on the back of each, they weren't quite that insane
              All worked fine except for one - much to their dismay
              Destiny had picked Warren Buffet for this, his Judgement Day

              Eleven little celebrities taking party in a reality show
              Three locked themselves in a room as they got ready to do some blow
              One got much too greedy as he looked upon the white stuff
              Jake "The Snake" Roberts did not stop, until his body said "Enough!"

              Ten little celebrities trying to figure out where to eat
              They wanted to fill themselves with good food at prices that couldn't be beat
              Their orders had just arrived and they had just begin to dine
              But the food on Neil Simon's plate was off, and they were reduced to nine

              Nine little celebrities going out to hunt some ducks
              They're sure they will get a bunch, if they have a little luck
              One turns to the other, asking about karma and fate
              So distracted, Jean Chretin shoots himself, bringing their number to eight

              Eight little celebrities walking through a haunted house
              One becomes separated from the rest, because of a fearsome mouse
              She thinks she has found the way out, when she sees a door marked "Heaven"
              It's the last step for Anne Rice, and now their number is seven

              Seven little celebrities getting ready to celebrate the New Year
              Most hope the coming days will not be filled with fear
              But one of them has an evil mind, she knows all the dirty tricks
              Sue Grafton chokes on a tampered noise-maker, and then there were just six

              Six little celebrities seeing a movie about outer space
              And all the rocks that floated there - it was a busy place
              When they were walking home a meteor was seen - but not all of them saw it dive
              Neil Armstrong was looking the other way when it took off his head - which is how they became the five

              Five little celebrities playing a game of truth or dare
              Things were going fine until it was time for one of them to share
              Tom Wolfe refused to speak the truth saying he would not play no more
              When a chandelier fell on top of him, making a group of four

              Four little celebrities taking a skiing holiday
              The weather was fine and beautiful, causing one of them to say
              "Nothing bad can happen here, as long as you miss those trees."
              Courtney Love failed that simple test, shrinking them to three

              Three little celebrities walking slowly through the woods
              They were taking part in a scavenger hunt, because their agents said they should
              Pele did not want to be there, so he kicked a pile of leaves with his shoe
              Springing the bear trap hidden underneath, making them just two

              Two little celebrities staying home, where it was safe and sound
              One got bored and turned on the tube, and then on the table started to pound
              They were saying he was washed up, that his career was no longer in the sun
              Jerry Lewis got so mad he had a heart attack, and then there was just one

              One little celebrity decided to go on a fishing trip
              Everything was going smoothly until they took an awful slip
              A sweet transvestite had fallen overboard, with no one to save him it was no fun
              And so Tim Curry slipped beneath the waves, sadly leaving us with none.
              "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." - Clarence Darrow
              "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain

              Comment


              • Lord love a duck. embalmer has to put more work into this than anyone else puts into anything else.
                Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.
                "Hating America is something best left to Mobius. He is an expert Yank hater.
                He also hates Texans and Australians, he does diversify." ~ Braindead

                Comment


                • If there were bonus points for style embalmer would be all over them.

                  Tommy Hunter is #18 for those who were wondering.
                  "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." - Clarence Darrow
                  "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain

                  Comment


                  • Originally posted by Dinner View Post
                    Now all we need is someone to die.
                    Just back from a funeral. No one famous.
                    Apolyton's Grim Reaper 2008, 2010 & 2011
                    RIP lest we forget... SG (2) and LaFayette -- Civ2 Succession Games Brothers-in-Arms

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                    • I don't like saying nice things about people because I'm afraid it will make the chicks think I'm not tough, but very good work embalmer.

                      As for Wezil, I blame you that no celebrities are dying yet.
                      “As a lifelong member of the Columbia Business School community, I adhere to the principles of truth, integrity, and respect. I will not lie, cheat, steal, or tolerate those who do.”
                      "Capitalism ho!"

                      Comment


                      • Originally posted by DaShi View Post
                        As for Wezil, I blame you that no celebrities are dying yet.
                        I thought you would appreciate the courtesy of our celebrity contestants in waiting until late submissions were in before playing their role.
                        "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." - Clarence Darrow
                        "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain

                        Comment


                        • I'm just gonna go ahead and suggest that you go ahead and award embalmer some style points anyway. An even 20, one for each verse.
                          "My nation is the world, and my religion is to do good." --Thomas Paine
                          "The subject of onanism is inexhaustable." --Sigmund Freud

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                          • anyone pick heather locklear yet?
                            To us, it is the BEAST.

                            Comment


                            • Originally posted by Sava View Post
                              anyone pick heather locklear yet?
                              No, but she would probably be a good one.
                              "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." - Clarence Darrow
                              "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain

                              Comment


                              • Thanks for the kind words - I don't go all out on everything, but when I do, I try to give it my all. I was a bit disappointed that I missed the original deadline as I had changed some of my picks to better suit the verses (Zsa Zsa Gabor was #20, but luckily Axel Rose does just as well I think) but as it was I think I only redid three verses to fit my old picks so it wasn't that bad (I'm not quite sure how I failed to identify Tommy Hunter though ).

                                And thanks to everyone for extending the deadline so I could play this year
                                If at first you don't succeed, take the bloody hint and give up.

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