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Did you know that Poly has a lifestyle named after it?

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  • Did you know that Poly has a lifestyle named after it?

    Or really it's just a coincidence. Anyway, when I tell people I hang out at a "Poly" website, they look at me funny.

    Do you support a Poly lifestyle? I couldn't do it myself, I'm far too lazy and unattractive. But I am okay with others living however they want to live (with the caveats Dan Savage mentions in the column with regards to their kids.)

    I'm a 26-year-old guy in a polyamorous relationship. As this is my first kick at the poly can, I wasn't dying to tell my family, "Hey, I'm dating a married woman!" However, through the magic of Facebook, my brother found out that the girl I'm seeing has a husband. Once I was "busted," I discussed the situation with my sister-in-law. The issue is that my GF and her husband have a 10-year-old son. My brother has compared the poly community to drug addicts and stated that CPS should remove my girlfriend's child from her home, etc. My brother and his wife are now threatening to cut me out of their lives—as well as their children's lives, whom I care for a great deal—if I don't dump the girlfriend. Thoughts?

    Forced To Pick

    Right off the top of my head: Your brother is a ****-smeared *******, your sister-in-law is an ***-smeared ****hole, and they'd be doing you a huge favor if they cut you out of their lives.

    Pick the GF, FTP. That might mean you won't see your nieces/nephews for a while, which would be sad for you and bad for those kids (children with crazy, controlling parents need to spend quality time with saner family members). But if you dump your girlfriend at their insistence—if you fail to stand up to them—you will have established a dangerous precedent: Your love life isn't yours to manage, it's theirs, and all your future partners will be subject to their bat****tery/scrutiny and, if they disapprove of any future girlfriends (concurrent or subsequent), they will attempt to exercise the veto power you ceded to them during this conflict.

    Your brother and sister-in-law are bullies, FTP, and you've got to defend yourself. So long as your GF and her husband aren't doing anything inappropriate in front of their son and they're not placing unfair burdens on their son (they don't expect him to keep secrets, if they're not out about being poly; they don't expect him to be out about his parents being poly, if they are out and he's not comfortable sharing that info with his friends), you need to come to their defense, too. And you might want to consult a lawyer now, just in case your brother and sister-in-law call CPS.
    The Stranger, Seattle's Only Newspaper: Covering Seattle news, politics, music, film, and arts; plus movie times, club calendars, restaurant listings, forums, blogs, and Savage Love.


    EDIT: Censored some profanity
    Last edited by Mojotronica; November 23, 2011, 19:53.

  • #2
    This is why we need to protect the sanctity of marriage from the gays...
    Last edited by Aeson; November 23, 2011, 19:49. Reason: MrFun isn't here to apologize for gays ruining marriage, so I will apologize on his behalf

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    • #3
      Please stop posting. Both of you.
      12-17-10 Mohamed Bouazizi NEVER FORGET
      Stadtluft Macht Frei
      Killing it is the new killing it
      Ultima Ratio Regum

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      • #4
        It's blatantly obvious to everyone that I won't stop posting at your behest, even you must know this... so you must be trying reverse psychology on me to get me to post more. I'm flattered, thanks... but I post (or not) for no man

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        • #5
          I was under the impression that physical attractiveness was not totally essential for this lifestyle. No, wait, I'm thinking of "swinging." Probably true for this too, though.
          1011 1100
          Pyrebound--a free online serial fantasy novel

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          • #6
            Are you talking about poly or posting on poly? (I guess it works for either...)

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            • #7
              I'm more interested in staying in my relationship then trying to **** everything up by swinging. Besides, in all likelihood multiple women wouldn't want to swing with me and if they did I wouldn't want to touch them.
              Try http://wordforge.net/index.php for discussion and debate.

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              • #8
                By the by, what kind of colossal numbnuts puts this kind of thing on Facebook?
                1011 1100
                Pyrebound--a free online serial fantasy novel

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                • #9
                  I'm facebooking it now!
                  Try http://wordforge.net/index.php for discussion and debate.

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Elok View Post
                    By the by, what kind of colossal numbnuts puts this kind of thing on Facebook?
                    Sit-on-my-Facebook?
                    There's nothing wrong with the dream, my friend, the problem lies with the dreamer.

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