Why do people have pets?

[MikeH]

1. Everyone has access to google.
2. Of course, how else do we keep our posts smug and elitist?

[rah]

Dogs are the product of 15,000 years of domestication and breeding designed to make them look to humans as not only pack members, but eternal alphas that must be pleased and obeyed.

They are the ultimate slave race.

We now own cats so we're the new ultimate slave race.

[Elok]

Sure thing, Samwise

No way in hell is he cool enough to be Sam.

[Dinner]

Pets either I or my family had while growing up:

- 4 different dogs (all lived to be at least 15 years of age with one living to 18).
- 7 different cats (sadly, our house was on the edge of a canyon so most of them didn't last long since the coyotes got them; a few were smart enough to come inside at night and they lasted a long time though).
- 2 birds (one died of having indigestible stuff blocking it's stomach while the other flew the coup and got outside never to be seen again).
- 1 turtle (I caught it outside in a pond)
- innumerable fish, tadpoles, frogs, crayfish, and even one "pet" freshwater clam which lived in our aquarium for several months before croaking.
- 2 pet rats, white rats which were very smart but for some reason kept peeing on their own food dish
- 1 pet hamster. Got loose and was never seen again.

In my early teens my friend and I found some baby raccoons which had apparently been abandoned so I tried to keep one but my parents wouldn't let me keep it. It was smart and young enough that I think it could have been well socialized. This is not really a pet but a wild duck was very tamed by the previous renters at an apartment I stayed at in college so the duck would walk up to the back sliding glass door and peck at the window until someone would go out and give her some bread. The duck would even walk inside the living room if the door was open but the bastard kept ****ting on our carpet. There was a lot of wild life around that area so you could get both baby and adult raccoons walking up to you to beg for food and one young fox would even take food out of people's hands if you sat still and didn't scare him. It's not good to feed wild animals but there were so many college kids around doing it they were all semi-tamed.

Edit: Forgot a pet rabbit but it died when I was really young. My older sister dropped him and broke one of his bones or something (she was like 4 or 5) so it had to be put down.

[giblets]

Apparently we get 250,000 dog bites in the UK each year vs 7 million in the US. You have 5 times the population and 28 times the dog bites? And we're much more crowded. Why are you so bad at training dogs?

I don't know where you're getting these statistics from.

[Supr49er]

What the ****? Stop trying to compare me to science fiction fantasy characters.

Game of Thrones is not Sci-Fi

[Tupac Shakur]

Pets either I or my family had while growing up:

No one cares, you insufferable hipster narcissist.

[Dinner]

I don't get the hipster claim since I've never been anything like that but I suppose you love to spew nonsense.

[Tupac Shakur]

There's nothing more hipsterish than being offended when people rightfully call you a hipster.

[Dinner]

So pointing out that you're factually incorrect is proof you are correct? Just when I thought your nonsensical tautology couldn't get any worse you up your ****** factor. Well done, Drake, well done.

[Al B. Sure!]

Hey, Oerdin, if I deny that I'm gay, does that mean I'm gay?

[Dinner]

No, not in and of itself but in your case there is abundant supporting evidence.

[giblets]

Hey, Oerdin, if I deny that I'm gay, does that mean I'm gay?

Yes, because you are gay.

[Zoetstofzoetje]

No problem Luke.

I was thinking more of Dilbert

[Dinner]

Yes, because you are gay.

I have to admit if a guy is pushing 30 and he's never been with a girl then he isn't that in to girls.