And so the saga continues....to call or not to call that is the question

[Theben]

So call or not to call.

I guess it depends on how much you enjoy this drama, how many more years you are willing to endure it, what physical/emotional risk level you feel the kids can take, and you like the idea of your grandchildren winding up with someone like PS when they're adults.

[Elok]

Okay, talked to my mom (psych professor w/experience as a pastoral counselor). It seems the term I was looking for was indeed "codependent," Tia. There's this whole established pattern dysfunctional relationships go through; if they've followed it, PS has probably spent the past couple of years systematically putting your daughter down so she feels like crap and thinks she's lucky even to have this ****head. The worst part is, it's a repeating pattern, so once she gets rid of the one loser she's statistically very likely to find a replacement slimeball unless you can intervene and get a therapist to undo the colossal mind**** he's pulled on her. Now, how to get her to see a therapist in the first place is the tricky part...I guess you go on the Poly prayer list with Sloww, for now. Good luck.

[Dr Strangelove]

Don't call. Hire a lawyer and go down there and blow the whistle on this guy. Give them names dates and all the details they're willing to listen to.

[TCO]

Like mother, like daughter. If you even have one. You've lied about everything else.

[Tiamat]

I have called CPS before and they came out drug tested PS and S he of course came up dirty and they informed her that if she had him around those kids again that they would interceed. He's been around them I've notified them before and so have other people but they've done nothing.

I would have at least thought that when a two year old is walking in the middle of a busy street and the police have to come out and get her because he's not around that HELLLOOOOOOOO!!!! SCHMOOOIE this should be a red flag.

I did call yesterday 6 times and no one would talk to me or return my calls. Steve and I have done everything we know how to do by the book. We take them every single weekend so they can get out of there. The kids are even at the point where they tell S no I don't want to go with you I want to go with MoMo. The one bright shiny moment in all of this is that there is now a 2 year restraining order on him ( which is nothing but a piece of paper if she still lets him around) but he is charged with Aggrivated Assult with intent to do severe bodily harm which is a class two felony and carries a 2 to 20 year sentence. He will go to court in the next 30 days so Steve and I are going to find out the date and go. It's an open court. Everytime he walks into that court room I want him to see my face. I'm also going to get in contact with the prosecution and let them now everything. I've kept dates and occurances so we do have some proof.

So that's where we're at and I'm going to keep calling today and may just even go down there and sit and tell them I"m not leaving until someone talks to me.

And yes, she is very co-dependent. She has this convaluted idea that we have no choice in our life, our path is laid out by fate already and she just has to walk it!??????! I'm like helooo there is a little thing called free will! You can make the choice every single day to change your life, it's in our control.


TCO- you've been trolling me for 5 years now don't you think that's enough? If you don't like me or what I have to say then don't read the thread and don't comment. "That's all I have to say about that!"

[Tiamat]

Japher ~ you're right. This is just as much her fault as it is his. She allowed him to keep coming back and do these things even enabling him. Sorta like an alcoholic, until there ready for help they won't get it, but we have to do something until she figures that one out because these beautiful kids are the ones suffering.

[Alinestra Covelia]

If you can, get legal advice. Depending on the state you're in, there may be a Legal Services Corporation state-funded service that can help you. Even if not, there may be a lawyer who can provide "limited scope legal assistance" which will be far more affordable than a lawyer who'll provide full legal services (which it looks like you really don't need here). Looks like child custody is already a fairly accessible field of law, so this will basically consist of making sure you have the right documents and forms and don't exceed various statute of limitations deadlines, etc.

If the kids' situation is serious then having a lawyer may also be useful if he/she can identify criminal charges or legal shortcuts to giving you custody. Good luck, you're out to do the right thing, and you're proactive about it. The system tends to reward people in that situation.

As for TCO, just put him on ignore. He's never posted anything worthwhile as far as I can tell, so you won't miss much.

[Tiamat]

It's very hard not to be proactive when you see their little shiny faces and they say "MoMo I want to go wishhhhyooooo" Asia hasn't quite learned how to say with you so it's sounds like wish yooooo! I love those babies and I love my daughter but she's 23 and can take care of herself (sorta) those kids can't.

[Tiamat]

And saga done at least for the next 60 days. Children went into CPS custody for the next 60 days. They wouldn't let us have them because my homebased business staying home ass 7 days a week with a husband that's had the same job for the last 17 years and makes.......well let me just say it's most definately enough, live in one of the best school districts in town etc. can't have them because 15 years ago I made a decision to seek medical attention for my daughter and now it has come back to bite me in the ass.

Nope they put the children with a person who's been in and out of my daughters lives and caused drama sells crack and is married to someone who actually gets a social security check for being crazy!???!!!!!! Do you know how hard it is in the first place to get a social security check let alone be able to get one and prove your nuts!! And she already has 6 kids and is pregnant with her 7 and is on section 8, food stamps and usually there are an additional 2 to 5 extra pepole and children living with them that she's getting money from under the table. Yes, lordy our hard earned tax dollars at work!!

Bullet point version:

Cps shows up friday and says you can do it voluntarily or we will be back on Monday with a court order to take them. The actually went to the jail and talked to pond scum and believed some of the stuff he said. Anyway the point being is now someone is finally listening but putting them in a house and situation that was worse then where they were. Selfbiased can back me up on this one. For his knowledge they put the kids with Missy and Stella instead of us. Now if Self reads this then I ask you Self, was that a wise decision? Kids are better off away from that but not in the middle of crack central and KooKooville!!

Here are my little ones, aren't they beautiful!

These are my little beauties and angels. Keep good thoughts for them because right now they need it.

[Tiamat]

sorry I'm don't know how to do computer stuff or how to make that smaller, if you know how please do so and I have two more I want to post but they said they are to big so can someone make them smaller for me?

[duke o' york]

I'm so sorry to hear your news Tia. I hope the CPS see sense soon, and your beauties are restored to a loving home. I don't know if you want to go down this route, because it would lead to more stress and possible heartbreak, but it ought to be possible to discredit the evidence ps gave them and make them realise that yours in the right home for the girls.

[chequita guevara]

Get a lawyer. Institutions pay more attention to lawyers than they do to little people.

Next, I don't think you're the best place for those kids to be, even if I agree that where those kids are now is horrible. To be brutally honest, you aren't the most stable and drama free person in the world. If you want the best for those kids, you want them to grow up someplace your messed up family can't mess them up. I know that's harsh, and you probably hate me for it, but you need to come to terms with it and do what's best for the kids.

[Dinner]

Stop making excuses for your daughter. She's a dirt bag just like him.

[Tiamat]

Nope Che, don't hate you for stating your opinion, this is America after all.

However, I must say that in the last 7 years that I have been married my life has completely changed, calmed down and is almost except for every once and a while when something like this crops up drama free and it isn't really even my drama it's hers. We moved about 25 miles away from the city and live out at the lake. We took ourselves out of the drama mix, we've even gone so far as only one of my children actually know where we live, M & S don't have a clue where we live. I pick up the kids bring them out here and take them back.

I wouldn't go so far as to call my own daughter a dirt bag but she is not being the person she can be or has the capacity to be. Sarah is an incredibly smart young lady. She was one of those kids who could go to class and not open the book but still make straight A's. I think she began to get board there was no challange so she began to go the wrong way. She's about 6 feet tall with long blonde hair a beautiful girl who's just lost her way. She's totally wrong no doubt, but there has to be a way to help her find her way for herself and those kids.

I can't say dirtbag but wrong, totally yes.