I am a walking miracle

[Pekka]

you know it's true.

Anyway I just got some great news. Got back from check up, because I'm seeing like the whole medical staff of this city weekly, finally starting to bounce back. So my results came back. Basically I've been tested like a monkey because I had severe burn out and major depression, so I was in deep trouble and I'm still not out of it but getting better.

So since my employer pays for everything automatically, and they are my doctors, they just do everything and charge. But it's fine with me, hey, it's free for me so why not.

So today I got my blood results back, nothing wrong, good values. Also they measured my blood pressure, it was excellent, healthy as an ox. Then they did the medical check with everything like family history, also excellent, no family diseases. Height, weight, just basic check up and everything. So as they know my history, and that I've gained weight in the last year because I haven't done much sports at all, just very stressed and now the last couple of month total imprisonment in my own place, they didn't first believe the results so they double checked them for mistakes. You see, I'm a walking miracle, physical phenomenon.

Then the cognitive skills, they tested my memory and all kinds of things, I scored full points. I mean my memory still stinks, my concnetration skills are still very low. But naturalyl I busted the index out the window. So they just figured it's weird, very weird, that I score full points in everything and not break a sweat, yet I'm sick as ****.

What can I say. Your human tests are too easy. I am God to you, and a walking miracle. So I had a good day because I was worried about my health, I've been abusing it for so long now.

[Panag]

we always knew you where special Pekka , ....


so do you have an extra health insurance just in case , ....


have a healthy day

[dannubis]

That or you are in LOEVE...

[Panag]

Originally posted by dannubis
That or you are in LOEVE...

Hi ,




well he is happy that all is normal , thank G-D for that !


Have a nice day


btw , check the meet in brussels thread OT

[Japher]

it's probably mono

[Pekka]

panag, will do that soon.

Yeah I'm happy that it was all OK. It's been..last time I got full check up was the army. It's years now, so you always sort of wonder that kind of stuff anyway. You get to a point where you don't want to volunteer and go and have it done, so now that it was done, it's always a relief. You think what if they find something odd, then they tell you ohh you've got this illness that is quite serious... so you tend to worry about things like that.

So I'm definitely very glad about it. One less thing to worry about.

[Panag]

Originally posted by Pekka
panag, will do that soon.

Yeah I'm happy that it was all OK. It's been..last time I got full check up was the army. It's years now, so you always sort of wonder that kind of stuff anyway. You get to a point where you don't want to volunteer and go and have it done, so now that it was done, it's always a relief. You think what if they find something odd, then they tell you ohh you've got this illness that is quite serious... so you tend to worry about things like that.

So I'm definitely very glad about it. One less thing to worry about.

Hi ,

now keep going for your yearly check up

and get some vaccins if needed , ....

Have a nice healthy live

[Pekka]

I'm also the biggest pain in the ass for my psychologist. I do like her as a person, but I think I might be too much for her to handle.

I'll give you an example. From the get go I said that I have an attitude problem towards your science, so take it into account. I do not think you are unprofessional, I respect you and your knowledge and skills. I came here to recieve help, but in order for me to get better, you should know that I am not so much skeptical as I am an observer. Here's what I mean when it comes to your profession.

I think it is obvious that all of this is an invention of some kind, and at some point in history, we just sort of came up with the whole idea of madness, psychology, psychiatry... the concept of abnormal. I recognize it is a battle between institutions of power, cultures and so forth. What I'm interested in is the current situation, you are sitting there, I am sitting here, I am broken and you are supposed to fix me. The purpose of you fixing me is the idea of me being broken, that is also an invention. Today, you can take it to deeper levels, a sort of technology of madness, giving me a brain scan, determining if my serotonin level is too low, but the fact remains, we do not know how depression starts, we do not know if any medicine affects it and how exactly that happens. We can block certain things and release certain things but that's about it. So as far as science goes, we do not know exactly anything yet.

This is to say, that medical science is still sort of valid, however it is not at a level, where we can comfortably say it serves the purpose at any time. It is still sort of quasi-medical, where you represent power and I represent the broken one and it is your job and you have the authority to subjectify me in front of you and change me into something else, that has been pre-determined at some poitn in history.

So I'm interested in the kind of episteme of this science and the system of sciences, where I am the center of it myself right now. So I am also playing a role in the future history of this science, if I accept being a subject to you and your science, I play a role of letting it continue. But as far as I know, we don't know ****. If I disagree with your diagnosis, which is at best a self diagnosis because I choose what to tell you and you check your list how many points I get, like reading Cosmo, and then the power of your institution and medical knowledge, yet formal, labels me as a human automatically, even if you see me as a healthy one, you have come up with that concept to begin with so in this binary world of yours, I always play a role even if I want or not.... so if I choose to disagree with your diagnosis, I still play into your pocket. I still accept the notion of normal and abnormal, the ones you choose to define. What if I disagree with that whole dichotomy to begin with? Where do I stand then? I obviously recognize that I need help, because I feel bad. But that's about it, I refuse to play your games and I refuse to take part in your societal categorization of humans. And it is going to be my way or the highway. So can you help me? You should know that my attitude hinders me if you start with your indexes you print from the system, it's self diagnosis and I know what it measures so how do I know what I should choose? I can choose to be healthy, I know what you want. How do I measure misery, from 1-6? What is my level of misery? What's that all about. If I choose 4, I might be considered healthy, if I choose 6, with all the combined points from other questions, I might be suicidial according to you even if I deny so. And then you have the power to take my freedom away until I confess and submit to your knowledge, saying that you are right, I was suicidial and I accept it, because you play the games of "path to recovery starts from accepting your condition". So the power lies in your need to be correct, even if you aren't. How do you know? You have formal knowledge, you know how to print a form and say fill that for me would you. How is that going to help me?

Or say you print me another form, supposedly determining my personality. So you can talk my language, but you see, we have no common language, I'm an observer. I switch from language to language, so in order for you to establish a rapport with me, you have to come here with me, where you aren't a scientist but a mere interpreter of indexes, written by someone, statistically shown to be effective, according to someone. Stop trying to fix me if you want to have a rapport. Or you can possibly see if I have a personality disorder, again making me abnormal.

So takes this all into account.



Fair to say she wasn't pleased.

Basically the first session was all about me not trusting your science and don't you dare to write this down or enter my information on your databases. And that I don't trust people really. That hour passed quickly for me, slowly for her I bet she hates my guts!

[Garth Vader]

Originally posted by Japher
it's probably mono

That would have shown up in his blood tests.