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"Hey! Where's my p3nis?!?!"

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  • "Hey! Where's my p3nis?!?!"

    'm really concerned about the obvious and outrageous election fraud in Zimbabwe. Approaching 4 weeks of stonewalling while Mugabe digs in and ignores the election results. So I was perusing news from Africa when I ran across this...

    Lynchings in Congo as penis theft panic hits capital

    KINSHASA (Reuters) - Police in Congo have arrested 13 suspected sorcerers accused of using black magic to steal or shrink men's penises after a wave of panic and attempted lynchings triggered by the alleged witchcraft.

    Reports of so-called penis snatching are not uncommon in West Africa, where belief in traditional religions and witchcraft remains widespread, and where ritual killings to obtain blood or body parts still occur.

    Rumours of penis theft began circulating last week in Kinshasa, Democratic Republic of Congo's sprawling capital of some 8 million inhabitants. They quickly dominated radio call-in shows, with listeners advised to beware of fellow passengers in communal taxis wearing gold rings.

    Purported victims, 14 of whom were also detained by police, claimed that sorcerers simply touched them to make their genitals shrink or disappear, in what some residents said was an attempt to extort cash with the promise of a cure.

    "You just have to be accused of that, and people come after you. We've had a number of attempted lynchings. ... You see them covered in marks after being beaten," Kinshasa's police chief, Jean-Dieudonne Oleko, told Reuters on Tuesday.

    Police arrested the accused sorcerers and their victims in an effort to avoid the sort of bloodshed seen in Ghana a decade ago, when 12 suspected penis snatchers were beaten to death by angry mobs. The 27 men have since been released.

    "I'm tempted to say it's one huge joke," Oleko said.

    "But when you try to tell the victims that their penises are still there, they tell you that it's become tiny or that they've become impotent. To that I tell them, 'How do you know if you haven't gone home and tried it'," he said.

    Some Kinshasa residents accuse a separatist sect from nearby Bas-Congo province of being behind the witchcraft in revenge for a recent government crackdown on its members.

    "It's real. Just yesterday here, there was a man who was a victim. We saw. What was left was tiny," said 29-year-old Alain Kalala, who sells phone credits near a Kinshasa police station.

    (For full Reuters Africa coverage, visit: http://africa.reuters.com/ )
    Apolyton's Grim Reaper 2008, 2010 & 2011
    RIP lest we forget... SG (2) and LaFayette -- Civ2 Succession Games Brothers-in-Arms

  • #2
    Awesome.
    "The issue is there are still many people out there that use religion as a crutch for bigotry and hate. Like Ben."
    Ben Kenobi: "That means I'm doing something right. "

    Comment


    • #3
      Shrinkage isn't awesome.

      Not that I would know anything about it!
      Long time member @ Apolyton
      Civilization player since the dawn of time

      Comment


      • #4
        Shrinkage is what makes my life manageable.
        "The issue is there are still many people out there that use religion as a crutch for bigotry and hate. Like Ben."
        Ben Kenobi: "That means I'm doing something right. "

        Comment


        • #5
          Apply the concept to your ego.
          Long time member @ Apolyton
          Civilization player since the dawn of time

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by Lancer
            Apply the concept to your ego.


            "The issue is there are still many people out there that use religion as a crutch for bigotry and hate. Like Ben."
            Ben Kenobi: "That means I'm doing something right. "

            Comment


            • #7


              Lancer

              Having a sense of self-humor
              <Reverend> IRC is just multiplayer notepad.
              I like your SNOOPY POSTER! - While you Wait quote.

              Comment


              • #8
                You could have it made into a writing pen.
                Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.
                "Hating America is something best left to Mobius. He is an expert Yank hater.
                He also hates Texans and Australians, he does diversify." ~ Braindead

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by snoopy369


                  Lancer

                  Having a sense of self-humor
                  By closing my massive rapid fire artillery thread you cut off my sense of manhood.

                  I'll need a shrink now, and Poly will get the bill!
                  Long time member @ Apolyton
                  Civilization player since the dawn of time

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    I'll need a shrink now


                    It's already small enough, wouldn't you say?
                    “I give you a new commandment, that you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”
                    - John 13:34-35 (NRSV)

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Asher



                      I must say I'm honored. Asher doesn't use the unworthy smiley too often.
                      Long time member @ Apolyton
                      Civilization player since the dawn of time

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Imran Siddiqui
                        I'll need a shrink now


                        It's already small enough, wouldn't you say?
                        How could I have? ...and there's Imran like a freakin lightning bolt. What have I done to deserve this???
                        Long time member @ Apolyton
                        Civilization player since the dawn of time

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          I'm quick like bunny!!

                          (that's what she said!! )
                          “I give you a new commandment, that you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”
                          - John 13:34-35 (NRSV)

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Huh. Lots O Drama. I better let AC take over from here.
                            Long time member @ Apolyton
                            Civilization player since the dawn of time

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Better not. If she thinks less of us then we can't have her as mistress when we run for office.

                              Imran/Lancer '12
                              “I give you a new commandment, that you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”
                              - John 13:34-35 (NRSV)

                              Comment

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