If these battles were movies people would try to get their money back

[Barnabas]

Originally posted by Deity Dude
I always like when a country that is way over matched starts a war they cant possibly win.

Falkland Islands come to mind quickly.

The greatest south american war of that Kind, is the "triple alianza war" Paraguay vs Brazil, Argentina and Uruguay.

Paraguay was the aggressor by the way, they lost half of their territory, and most of its population was exterminated, it fell from 1.300 millions to 200 thousand, most of them women, kids and old people.


Argentina invaded the falklands, because they thought England would not try to get the islands back, that the english were not going to travel 10 thousand kilometers for a couple of small islands with 2000 inhabitants.
Also, Argentina and England had been allies since the XIX century.
A week before the falklands war, hundreds of thousands of armed peronists marched to the government house and threatened the military dictatorship with violence, the military thought "we have to do something quick to regain popularity or the people are going to kill us all", and the best idea they had was "re-conquering" the falkland islands, for a few weeks their planned worked, they became popular again, the same people who were cursing them the last week, were now waving argentine flags, but once they lost the war they had to leave the government and reinstate democracy.


Other latin american wars are the pacific war between Peru/Bolivia and Chile, in that war Bolivia lost its coast and became a landlocked country.

The Chaco war between Bolivia and Paraguay, the 2 countries fought for a territory which they thought was rich in oil, but it had no oil at all, a very pathetic war.

And the football/soccer war between Salvador and Honduras!


The most boring war was the war between Argentina and Brazil for Uruguay, it ended up in a tie, Argentina winning on land, but Brazil blockading the harbour of Buenos Aires with its superior fleet.
Because no one could win, england came, and said, lets make Uruguay an independent country so you 2 stop fighting for it.
And that way Uruguay was born.

[Rufus T. Firefly]

The Battle of New Orleans: 8000 British troops attack 4500 Americans, to no real effect; in the end, there are ~2000 British casualties, and ~100 American casualties, giving Americans a taste of what it will be like, in the distant future, to play Civ against the AI. Icing on the cake: the battle took place 2 weeks after the peace treaty had been signed.

Operation Urgent Fury: The US invasion of Grenada, which was neither urgent nor furious, but did "liberate" the island fron the evil Cuban construction crew that was finally getting around to building an airport that had been in the planning stages -- quite publicly, with cooperation from the US's closest allies -- for 30 years. Icing on the cake: evacuated US med students, who were in Grenada to begin with because they were to stupid to get into American med schools, are treated as returning heroes.

[Zkribbler]

In 1814 we took a little trip
Along with Colonel Jackson down the mighty Mississip.
We took a little bacon and we took a little beans
And we caught the bloody British in the town of New Orleans.

[Chorus:]
We fired our guns and the British kept a'comin.
There wasn't nigh as many as there was a while ago.
We fired once more and they began to runnin' on
Down the Mississippi to the Gulf of Mexico.

We looked down the river and we see'd the British come.
And there must have been a hundred of'em beatin' on the drum.
They stepped so high and they made the bugles ring.
We stood by our cotton bales and didn't say a thing.

[Chorus]

Old Hickory said we could take 'em by surprise
If we didn't fire our muskets 'til we looked 'em in the eye
We held our fire 'til we see'd their faces well.
Then we opened up with squirrel guns and really gave 'em ... well

[Chorus]

Yeah, they ran through the briars and they ran through the brambles
And they ran through the bushes where a rabbit couldn't go.
They ran so fast that the hounds couldn't catch 'em
Down the Mississippi to the Gulf of Mexico.**

We fired our cannon 'til the barrel melted down.
So we grabbed an alligator and we fought another round.
We filled his head with cannon balls, and powdered his behind
And when we touched the powder off, the gator lost his mind.

[Chorus]

Yeah, they ran through the briars and they ran through the brambles
And they ran through the bushes where a rabbit couldn't go.
They ran so fast that the hounds couldn't catch 'em
Down the Mississippi to the Gulf of Mexico.

[lord of the mark]

Originally posted by CerberusIV
Battles that would not make a good film - Battle of Omdurman springs to mind.

The outcome is predictable and the action is kind of repetitive - when you have 10,000 jihadists to machine gun there are only so many ways you can show someone getting shot in slo-mo.

actually I think they DID make a movie of that - it was called "Young Winston" or something like that.

[Dr Strangelove]

Originally posted by Rufus T. Firefly
The Battle of New Orleans: 8000 British troops attack 4500 Americans, to no real effect; in the end, there are ~2000 British casualties, and ~100 American casualties, giving Americans a taste of what it will be like, in the distant future, to play Civ against the AI. Icing on the cake: the battle took place 2 weeks after the peace treaty had been signed.

But they DID make this into a movie starring Charlton Heston as Gen. Andrew Jackson and Yul Brynner as the pirate Jean LaFeet. It's a great oldie.

Operation Urgent Fury: The US invasion of Grenada, which was neither urgent nor furious, but did "liberate" the island fron the evil Cuban construction crew that was finally getting around to building an airport that had been in the planning stages -- quite publicly, with cooperation from the US's closest allies -- for 30 years. Icing on the cake: evacuated US med students, who were in Grenada to begin with because they were to stupid to get into American med schools, are treated as returning heroes.

Actually it was a little bit urgent. The civilian socialist regime of Maurice Bishop was overthrown by the military, who were holding the students hostage. The situation on the island was rapidly deteriorating.

Oh, and they DID make a movie out of that too.

[Dr Strangelove]

Originally posted by lord of the mark


actually I think they DID make a movie of that - it was called "Young Winston" or something like that.

Also Khartoum , starring Charlton Heston once again.