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Kim Jong Il hopes to gain mutant superpowers

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  • Kim Jong Il hopes to gain mutant superpowers

    by eating huge mutant rabbits...


    Bunny boiler: Kim Jong-il ate my giant rabbits

    April 6, 2007


    BERLIN: A German farmer who sold 12 giant rabbits to North Korea with the aim of setting up a breeding program to alleviate famine has said he was shocked to hear they were eaten at Kim Jong-il's birthday banquet.

    Karl Szmolinsky sent his oversized bunnies to Pyongyang to boost meat production. Der Spiegel reported that the 68-year-old breeder had been due to travel to North Korea to help set up the farm, but had received a telephone call last week from an official cancelling the trip.

    Mr Szmolinsky told Der Spiegel that although he had no evidence, he believed his rabbits, which each weighed more than 10 kilograms, had been eaten at a banquet for the North Korean leader on February 16. "North Korea won't be getting any more rabbits from me, they don't even need to bother asking," he told the magazine.

    Among the rabbits sent to North Korea late last year was Robert, a monster who won a prize as Germany's largest rabbit.

    Pyongyang's embassy in Berlin has denied the rabbits are dead.


    Last edited by Sirotnikov; April 5, 2007, 18:05.

  • #2
    Eh, what's up, doc?
    “As a lifelong member of the Columbia Business School community, I adhere to the principles of truth, integrity, and respect. I will not lie, cheat, steal, or tolerate those who do.”
    "Capitalism ho!"

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    • #3

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      • #4
        He's surprised? He's SURPRISED!? Moron.
        The cake is NOT a lie. It's so delicious and moist.

        The Weighted Companion Cube is cheating on you, that slut.

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        • #5
          Time to declare a rabbit embargo! Where's the UN when you need it??!

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          • #6
            Oh my god this is one of the funniest stories ever!

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            • #7

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              • #8
                That's one big rabbit.
                I'm not buying BtS until Firaxis impliments the "contiguous cultural border negates colony tax" concept.

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                • #9
                  The trip was cancelled, so he concluded ol' Kim's eaten the rabbits? Is it just me, or does it seem a few steps are missing here?
                  Why can't you be a non-conformist just like everybody else?

                  It's no good (from an evolutionary point of view) to have the physique of Tarzan if you have the sex drive of a philosopher. -- Michael Ruse
                  The Nedaverse I can accept, but not the Berzaverse. There can only be so many alternate realities. -- Elok

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                  • #10
                    Seriously, do you expect logic from a guy who believed giant rabbits would fix famine in the country?
                    DISCLAIMER: the author of the above written texts does not warrant or assume any legal liability or responsibility for any offence and insult; disrespect, arrogance and related forms of demeaning behaviour; discrimination based on race, gender, age, income class, body mass, living area, political voting-record, football fan-ship and musical preference; insensitivity towards material, emotional or spiritual distress; and attempted emotional or financial black-mailing, skirt-chasing or death-threats perceived by the reader of the said written texts.

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                    • #11
                      Makes sense to me...rabbits will eat anything, easy to tend, don't need a lot of room, can survive colder temperatures than chickens, the only problem is low mass, and he solved it. It might've helped.

                      The dumbassery came of actually trusting KJI.
                      "Wait a minute..this isn''t FAUX dive, it's just a DIVE!"
                      "...Mangy dog staggering about, looking vainly for a place to die."
                      "sauna stories? There are no 'sauna stories'.. I mean.. sauna is sauna. You do by the laws of sauna." -P.

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                      • #12
                        1. Meat is a very wasteful method of feeding a population. You need to produce foodstuff to feed the foodstuff which is inherently less efficient than just producing foodstuff.

                        2. Bigger rabbits need more food. I somewhat doubt there are going be a lot of efficiency gains when you produce one big rabbit instead of two small ones.
                        DISCLAIMER: the author of the above written texts does not warrant or assume any legal liability or responsibility for any offence and insult; disrespect, arrogance and related forms of demeaning behaviour; discrimination based on race, gender, age, income class, body mass, living area, political voting-record, football fan-ship and musical preference; insensitivity towards material, emotional or spiritual distress; and attempted emotional or financial black-mailing, skirt-chasing or death-threats perceived by the reader of the said written texts.

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Colon™
                          1. Meat is a very wasteful method of feeding a population. You need to produce foodstuff to feed the foodstuff which is inherently less efficient than just producing foodstuff.
                          Yes, when the foodstuff is carrots or potatoes and you have the land to grow them. If the only land you have is scraggy then having goats or sheep or even cows becomes more useful, unless you want to eat the grass yourself?
                          One day Canada will rule the world, and then we'll all be sorry.

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Colon™
                            1. Meat is a very wasteful method of feeding a population. You need to produce foodstuff to feed the foodstuff which is inherently less efficient than just producing foodstuff.

                            2. Bigger rabbits need more food. I somewhat doubt there are going be a lot of efficiency gains when you produce one big rabbit instead of two small ones.
                            QFT. This story is hilarious on several levels.

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                            • #15
                              Originally posted by Dauphin


                              Yes, when the foodstuff is carrots or potatoes and you have the land to grow them. If the only land you have is scraggy then having goats or sheep or even cows becomes more useful, unless you want to eat the grass yourself?
                              Are you proposing giant rabbit pastures?
                              DISCLAIMER: the author of the above written texts does not warrant or assume any legal liability or responsibility for any offence and insult; disrespect, arrogance and related forms of demeaning behaviour; discrimination based on race, gender, age, income class, body mass, living area, political voting-record, football fan-ship and musical preference; insensitivity towards material, emotional or spiritual distress; and attempted emotional or financial black-mailing, skirt-chasing or death-threats perceived by the reader of the said written texts.

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