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Belgium has disolved! Dutch half has declared independance!!

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  • Belgium has disolved! Dutch half has declared independance!!

    ...or not.




    There's no revolution in Belgium. Really

    By RAF CASERT, Associated Press Writer Thu Dec 14, 6:55 PM ET

    BRUSSELS, Belgium - Suddenly and shockingly, Belgium came to an end. State television broke into regular programming late Wednesday with an urgent bulletin: The Dutch-speaking half of the country had declared independence and the king and queen had fled. Grainy pictures from the military airport showed dark silhouettes of a royal entourage boarding a plane.

    Only after a half hour did the station flash the message: "This is fiction."

    It was too late. Many Belgians had already fallen for the hoax.

    Frantic viewers flooded the call center of the RTBF broadcaster that aired the stunt. Embassies called Belgian authorities to find out what was going on, while foreign journalists scrambled to get confirmation.

    "Ambassadors who were worried asked what they had to tell their capitals," said Senate Chair Anne-Marie Lizin. "This fiction was seen as a reality and it created a catastrophic image of the country."

    RTBF defended the program, saying it showed the importance of debate on the future of Belgium. But the network won few friends.

    Even the Jean-Claude Juncker, the prime minister from neighboring Luxembourg, was angry and let it be know at the opening of the
    European Union summit. "This is not the kind of issue you play around with," he said.

    The RTBF's phony newscast reported that the "Flemish parliament has unilaterally declared the independence of Flanders" and that King Albert and Queen Paola had left on the first air force plane available.

    The broadcast showed jubilant demonstrators waving the yellow-and-black flag with the Flemish Lion outside the legislature. A small crowd of monarchists rallied outside the royal palace waving the Belgian flag.

    Reporting that the royal family fled did not go down well at the palace, which said in a statement the hoax was in "bad taste."

    "It is totally unacceptable," said Vice Premier Didier Reynders.

    The linguistic demons pitting Dutch-speaking Flanders in the north against French-speaking Wallonia in the south have been mostly quiet for the past two decades, ever since far-reaching autonomy was granted in the 1980s.

    Yet the economic disparity between wealthy Flanders and struggling Wallonia has recently intensified the political debate. The North is demanding more autonomy while the South clings to a unity that better spreads the economic spoils. The royal family is often portrayed as the glue that holds the nation together.

    Independence is not an aim of any of the major parties in power, whatever their linguistic preference. It explains why the program was so widely condemned on Thursday.

    "It is abhorrent. It defies belief. It is a caricature of Flanders," said Yves Leterme, the Minister-President of the Flemish region.

    His counterpart from Wallonia, Elio di Rupo, was just as negative. "Never in my long political life have I seen such worry. Anguish came from around the world," he said.

    About the only people who enjoyed the program were the separatist far-right Flemish Interest party. It wants to get rid of the king and thought it could see a flash of its future in an independent Flanders.

    "I want to congratulate the RTBF for this daring show," said Flemish Interest leader Filip Dewinter.
    What an incredibly stupid thing to do. Gee, you'd think they'd've at least heard of what happened when War of the Worlds was aired for the first time over the radio, the panic that caused, and why now decent and respectable television and radio media outlets include notices that they're airing fictional accounts right from the start... and not a half-hour into the program. F*cking assh*les, I hope their station is shut down permanently. "Daring show" my ass.
    The cake is NOT a lie. It's so delicious and moist.

    The Weighted Companion Cube is cheating on you, that slut.

  • #2
    Vive la Wallonie libre!
    What?

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    • #3
      The show itself was quite funny, but the RTBF are a bunch of *********. For instance, in preparation of the broadcast they organised a meeting with far-right politicans as well as moderate flamingants. Apparently, in all of their prejudice it didn't occur to the producers that this kind of meeting is typically unheard of.
      DISCLAIMER: the author of the above written texts does not warrant or assume any legal liability or responsibility for any offence and insult; disrespect, arrogance and related forms of demeaning behaviour; discrimination based on race, gender, age, income class, body mass, living area, political voting-record, football fan-ship and musical preference; insensitivity towards material, emotional or spiritual distress; and attempted emotional or financial black-mailing, skirt-chasing or death-threats perceived by the reader of the said written texts.

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      • #4
        :OrsonWelles:

        Comment


        • #5
          Haw, you people should get a sense of humor. You sound like, eh, germans. What I understood from that, the notion is as absurd, to people in Belgium, as Florida seceeding from the US would be for americans. Would you believe such news?
          I've allways wanted to play "Russ Meyer's Civilization"

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          • #6
            Where are you from Colon? If the country splits into two, would you care greatly one way or the other?

            Comment


            • #7
              Colon is teh evil waloon
              THEY!!111 OMG WTF LOL LET DA NOMADS AND TEH S3D3NTARY PEOPLA BOTH MAEK BITER AXP3REINCES
              AND TEH GRAAT SINS OF THERE [DOCTRINAL] INOVATIONS BQU3ATH3D SMAL
              AND!!1!11!!! LOL JUST IN CAES A DISPUTANT CALS U 2 DISPUT3 ABOUT THEYRE CLAMES
              DO NOT THAN DISPUT3 ON THEM 3XCAPT BY WAY OF AN 3XTARNAL DISPUTA!!!!11!! WTF

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              • #8


                I laughed my ass off...

                You know, all those panicky walloons should get a second opinion and change channels to the flemish TV when something like that is announced.
                "Ceterum censeo Ben esse expellendum."

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                • #9

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                  • #10
                    Yeah, this is pretty damned funny, stupid or not.
                    1011 1100
                    Pyrebound--a free online serial fantasy novel

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Tattila the Hun
                      Haw, you people should get a sense of humor. You sound like, eh, germans. What I understood from that, the notion is as absurd, to people in Belgium, as Florida seceeding from the US would be for americans. Would you believe such news?
                      Florida seceeded?! BUT WHAT ABOUT DISNEYWORLD?!

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                      • #12
                        Originally posted by red_jon


                        Florida seceeded?! BUT WHAT ABOUT DISNEYWORLD?!
                        I thought Disney has been independend from 1967?
                        I've allways wanted to play "Russ Meyer's Civilization"

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          In the year 1166 B.C., a malcontented hunchbrain by the name of Greyface, got it into his head that the universe was as humorless as he, and he began to teach that play was sinful because it contradicted the ways of Serious Order. "Look at all the order around you," he said. And from that, he deluded honest men to believe that reality was a straightjacket affair and not the happy romance as men had known it.

                          It is not presently understood why men were so gullible at that particular time, for absolutely no one thought to observe all the disorder around them and conclude just the opposite. But anyway, Greyface and his followers took the game of playing at life more seriously than they took life itself and were known even to destroy other living beings whose ways of life differed from their own.

                          The unfortunate result of this is that mankind has since been suffering from a psychological and spiritual imbalance. Imbalance causes frustration, and frustration causes fear. And fear makes for a bad trip. Man has been on a bad trip for a long time now.

                          It is called THE CURSE OF GREYFACE.
                          Q from The Principia Discordia FT.
                          This is Shireroth, and Giant Squid will brutally murder me if I ever remove this link from my signature | In the end it won't be love that saves us, it will be mathematics | So many people have this concept of God the Avenger. I see God as the ultimate sense of humor -- SlowwHand

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                          • #14
                            Winston will be with us shortly. He's assembling information in preparation for an ACS briefing.

                            Details to come.
                            Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.
                            "Hating America is something best left to Mobius. He is an expert Yank hater.
                            He also hates Texans and Australians, he does diversify." ~ Braindead

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                            • #15
                              Originally posted by Tattila the Hun
                              Haw, you people should get a sense of humor. You sound like, eh, germans. What I understood from that, the notion is as absurd, to people in Belgium, as Florida seceeding from the US would be for americans. Would you believe such news?
                              The notion is not absurd at all, a lot of people in particularly the Flemish part of Belgium have sort-of wanted independence for a long time and apart from a shared king, capital and country name Belgium is effectively two countries already. It's probably more comparable to Scotland seceding from the UK, maybe even Quebec from Canada. It's still ludicrous that it would happen overnight, but the sentiment is certainly there.

                              Still, I agree people need to get a sense of humour, what I've heard of this was pretty funny and what's the point of life if you can't make the occasional joke
                              Administrator of WePlayCiv -- Civ5 Info Centre | Forum | Gallery

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