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I was browsing through wikipedia the other day when I came, somehow, to their entry on Burning Man. Naturally, like any decent American, my first thought was that for that last week every August, a single nuclear bomb could pretty much eliminate our country's problems with drugs, venereal disease, unemployment, and really creepy stuff impersonating art. But I dismissed the thought. Partly because there are innocent children and law enforcement officials stuck there along with the filthy hippies, but mostly because I couldn't imagine a situation in which a nuke would in fact be dropped on a temporary city in the middle of Nevada.
Then it hit me: the most licentious state in the Union is directly west of the most uptight and priggish one. That's a disaster waiting to happen. The only question is, if war broke out, who would win? For the sake of argument, we're assuming that outside forces do not interfere except insofar as they do already to keep the otherwise uninhabitable wastelands afloat. All the shipments of food, water, retirees with gambling problems, etc. continue, though they may of course be intercepted.
Now, food for thought:
-Wiki says Nevada's population is about two million, and Utah's about two and a half.
-Utah's population is probably in better physical shape due to pretty much everything being illegal or discouraged there (and the exact opposite being true in Nevada). Probably half of Nevada's conscriptable population would get the DTs in the trenches. Not good.
-Utah, due to the lingering presence of the polygamist Fundie branch of the Mormons, probably also has a good supply of expendable teenage boys to use as cannon fodder.
-The two states may actually be equally well-armed, between Nevada's lack of oversight and regulation on anything and Utah being a conservative bastion. Nevada may have a slight edge in firepower, but this should be balanced by their relative lack of proficiency; some of those Utah kids have been hunting deer with .22s since before they were potty-trained or something.
-Utah has Comrade Tassadar, among other polytubbies; Nevada has Dis.
-Nevada has Area 51, and thus may have access to experimental combat aircraft assuming the Feds clear out when the place becomes a war zone and don't take the stuff with them. However, that's a HUGE if. Also, if there are in fact aliens in Area 51, they will almost certainly side with the Mormons due to the similarity of their beliefs.
-Nevada may have an elite prostitute special forces division; the people of Utah do not aim very well while averting their eyes.
-Nevada has a LOT more cash. Outside intervention is verboten, of course, but they could bribe the enemy pretty effectively.
So, who do you think would win?
EDIT: Dagnabit, I forgot the poll!
Then it hit me: the most licentious state in the Union is directly west of the most uptight and priggish one. That's a disaster waiting to happen. The only question is, if war broke out, who would win? For the sake of argument, we're assuming that outside forces do not interfere except insofar as they do already to keep the otherwise uninhabitable wastelands afloat. All the shipments of food, water, retirees with gambling problems, etc. continue, though they may of course be intercepted.
Now, food for thought:
-Wiki says Nevada's population is about two million, and Utah's about two and a half.
-Utah's population is probably in better physical shape due to pretty much everything being illegal or discouraged there (and the exact opposite being true in Nevada). Probably half of Nevada's conscriptable population would get the DTs in the trenches. Not good.
-Utah, due to the lingering presence of the polygamist Fundie branch of the Mormons, probably also has a good supply of expendable teenage boys to use as cannon fodder.
-The two states may actually be equally well-armed, between Nevada's lack of oversight and regulation on anything and Utah being a conservative bastion. Nevada may have a slight edge in firepower, but this should be balanced by their relative lack of proficiency; some of those Utah kids have been hunting deer with .22s since before they were potty-trained or something.
-Utah has Comrade Tassadar, among other polytubbies; Nevada has Dis.
-Nevada has Area 51, and thus may have access to experimental combat aircraft assuming the Feds clear out when the place becomes a war zone and don't take the stuff with them. However, that's a HUGE if. Also, if there are in fact aliens in Area 51, they will almost certainly side with the Mormons due to the similarity of their beliefs.
-Nevada may have an elite prostitute special forces division; the people of Utah do not aim very well while averting their eyes.
-Nevada has a LOT more cash. Outside intervention is verboten, of course, but they could bribe the enemy pretty effectively.
So, who do you think would win?
EDIT: Dagnabit, I forgot the poll!
What a thread. A war between Utah and Nevada.
. I would sign up. 
.
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