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  • Stalin's half-man, half-ape super-warriors

    Get all of the latest news from The Scotsman. Providing a fresh perspective for online news.



    Super-troopers: Stalin wanted Planet of the Apes-like troops, insensitive to pain and hardship.
    Stalin's half-man, half-ape super-warriors
    CHRIS STEPHEN AND ALLAN HALL

    THE Soviet dictator Josef Stalin ordered the creation of Planet of the Apes-style warriors by crossing humans with apes, according to recently uncovered secret documents.

    Moscow archives show that in the mid-1920s Russia's top animal breeding scientist, Ilya Ivanov, was ordered to turn his skills from horse and animal work to the quest for a super-warrior.

    According to Moscow newspapers, Stalin told the scientist: "I want a new invincible human being, insensitive to pain, resistant and indifferent about the quality of food they eat."

    In 1926 the Politburo in Moscow passed the request to the Academy of Science with the order to build a "living war machine". The order came at a time when the Soviet Union was embarked on a crusade to turn the world upside down, with social engineering seen as a partner to industrialisation: new cities, architecture, and a new egalitarian society were being created.

    The Soviet authorities were struggling to rebuild the Red Army after bruising wars.

    And there was intense pressure to find a new labour force, particularly one that would not complain, with Russia about to embark on its first Five-Year Plan for fast-track industrialisation.

    Mr Ivanov was highly regarded. He had established his reputation under the Tsar when in 1901 he established the world's first centre for the artificial insemination of racehorses.

    Mr Ivanov's ideas were music to the ears of Soviet planners and in 1926 he was dispatched to West Africa with $200,000 to conduct his first experiment in impregnating chimpanzees.

    Meanwhile, a centre for the experiments was set up in Georgia - Stalin's birthplace - for the apes to be raised.

    Mr Ivanov's experiments, unsurprisingly from what we now know, were a total failure. He returned to the Soviet Union, only to see experiments in Georgia to use monkey sperm in human volunteers similarly fail.

    A final attempt to persuade a Cuban heiress to lend some of her monkeys for further experiments reached American ears, with the New York Times reporting on the story, and she dropped the idea amid the uproar.

    Mr Ivanov was now in disgrace. His were not the only experiments going wrong: the plan to collectivise farms ended in the 1932 famine in which at least four million died.

    For his expensive failure, he was sentenced to five years' jail, which was later commuted to five years' exile in the Central Asian republic of Kazakhstan in 1931. A year later he died, reportedly after falling sick while standing on a freezing railway platform.



    OK
    CSPA

  • #2
    And the Nazis had UFOs as well as a secret moonbase....
    Blah

    Comment


    • #3
      only to see experiments in Georgia to use monkey sperm in human volunteers similarly fail.
      yes... volunteers. of course.


      But I'm not convinced that the project really failed
      Attached Files
      CSPA

      Comment


      • #4
        : "I want a new invincible human being, insensitive to pain, resistant and indifferent about the quality of food they eat."

        Alas for Joe 'Schmoe' Stalin, Pekka was born too late, and a Finn.


        Vive la liberte. Noor Inayat Khan, Dachau.

        ...patriotism is not enough. I must have no hatred or bitterness towards anyone. Edith Cavell, 1915

        Comment


        • #5
          Homo Sovieticus with an even sicker twist, how apt.

          Comment


          • #6
            Stalin wanted Orcs. Amusing.

            -Arrian
            grog want tank...Grog Want Tank... GROG WANT TANK!

            The trick isn't to break some eggs to make an omelette, it's convincing the eggs to break themselves in order to aspire to omelettehood.

            Comment


            • #7
              See how LOTR was about WWII!

              Edit: I protest against the use of a christm....errm holiday cap on the smiley. It makes it impossible to use it seriously.
              Blah

              Comment


              • #8
                So if Stalin is Sauron...
                GANDALF=HITLER

                and the hobbits are waffen-ss
                CSPA

                Comment


                • #9
                  Stalin is Saruman, Sauron is Hitler, and Gandalf is Oppenheimer *runs*
                  Blah

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    No, Saruman would be Hitler, Sauron is Hirohito (the ring is like the atom bombs, see) and Stalin is... uh... the easterlings and southrons that are still around afterwards and eventually start a COLD WAR with teh WEST!
                    Lime roots and treachery!
                    "Eventually you're left with a bunch of unmemorable posters like Cyclotron, pretending that they actually know anything about who they're debating pointless crap with." - Drake Tungsten

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Ok, that's convincing, so I stand corrected
                      Blah

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Which means that Frodo, incidentally, is the Enola Gay.
                        Lime roots and treachery!
                        "Eventually you're left with a bunch of unmemorable posters like Cyclotron, pretending that they actually know anything about who they're debating pointless crap with." - Drake Tungsten

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Actually Frodo, Sam and Gollum are the Enola Gay.
                          Blah

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                          • #14
                            Yeah and the Elves are obviously the US. They wanted to sailed over the sea into the west, but decided to help out the Hobbits&Co (who aren't he SS after all then) at the last minute.

                            Gollum = Rudolf Hess
                            CSPA

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Ringwraiths = Quisling, Petain, Jozef Tiso, and other collaborator heads of state.

                              We're on a roll!
                              Lime roots and treachery!
                              "Eventually you're left with a bunch of unmemorable posters like Cyclotron, pretending that they actually know anything about who they're debating pointless crap with." - Drake Tungsten

                              Comment

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