SNESA - SKILORDS Never Ending Stories Apolyton

[civman2000]

what happened to guyana's application to join?

[civman2000]

Guy Ana looked around at his new cabinet. The military and foreign advisors had been replaced with more trustworthy people.

"The reason I called this meeting," said the military advisor, "is that Blueb Heaven has crossed the border and savagely attacked us!"

"%*#&!!!!" said Guy. "Hows our military buildup?"

"Our army is getting to be what the international community calls 'medium'. Our navy construction has gone slowly and it is still quite small."

"BUt what about the Bluebish army?"

"ANd navy. THey've been secretly building up with American help and now have an army about teh same size as ours, a 'medium' navy, and even a small airforce!!"

"*&%#!!" Guy said a second time. "What are we supposed to do now?"

"We will be surrounded by enemies if all of NATO backs the invasion," said the foreign minister. "But what if we try to convince Italy, France, Britain, and Germany that the attack goes against their democratic philosophies, and that any support of Blueb Heaven is the same? They will condemn AMerica and Blueb HEaven, and if the invasion is not ended immediately, will kick them out of NATO and attack them with us."

"But our reputation is very low," said the assistant foreign advisor. "I think it wouldbe highly unlikely that they would agree to this."

"It's worth a try though," said Guy. "We've got nothing to lose. Let's do it."

If no one has taken a European NATO country within 24 hours and accepted/refused this proposal I will assume it was approved and NATO is split into an internal war

[Samuel Johnson]

Deep in the bowels of the Niveneh Mental hospital, a strait-jacketed Camel Hussein rocked back and forth on his heels. Since he had stopped taking the pills, he was remembering more. And now he remembered six months ago what happened before the men in the white suits came to take him away. Why, a fax appaered from Guy Ana asking for membership into the Band of Jihad. Camel had laughed manically as he shredded the fax and wrote back in a shaky hand:

"Dear Guy Ana,

Of course you can join. However, your membership must remain secret even from the other members. I will contact you when we need to make our move.

Love, Peace and Understanding,

Saddam Hussein"

Now Camel considered the small object he had secreted into his strait-jacket. It was a cell phone and once they loosened this thing, he would be giving Guy Ana a call. He giggled, then laughed then maniacally guffawed.

[Tarquinius]

This story seems like fun. Can I join you guys with this story?

[Metaliturtle]

yes, go to the first page and find a civ that hasn't been taken

[SKILORD]

what country do you want?

[Tarquinius]

I'll take Germany. Then you guys finally have a NATO member to play against

[Samuel Johnson]

LIVE RUSH TRANSCRIPT ***

Christiane Amanpour: Greetings, stupid sheep, I am here to explain the world to you. Today in the capital of Iraq, I had a chance to speak with the heroic, young and dashing Saddam Hussein and we discussed how the evil NATO continues to oppress his peoples. But earlier I attended a concert given by the starving children of Iraq. Let's take a look, shall we?

(CNN Camera pans across a room full of fat kids singing the following anthem):

We are the starving children of Iraq
The rest of the world hates us
We will strap nukes on our back
And send you all back to Hades

Kristiane (voice over): Today marked the 40th year of the embargo against the children of Iraq and by extension the children of the world. In the six months since the infamous Band of Jihad video tape was discovered, Saddam Hussein has had a complete public relations makeover and has emerged as a modern hero for the people not just of his country but of the world. I spoke with him today.

Cut to grainy video. Kristiane is standing next to Saddam, coming up just above his beer belly and Saddam is leering at her.

Kristiane: Saddam, while the NATO imperialists call you a beast, I have found you to be quite a gentle man much like my husband.

Saddam: Thanks, Kristiane, I am your biggest fan.

Kristiane: Yeees... now about that video tape.

Saddam: The evildoers in NATO have done me a great insult by manufacturing that tape. Why, I don't even know what pot is and I have never had a secret clubhouse.

Kristiane: Of course. And in fact, the rhetoric from the European side of NATO has been much softer towards you. One European leader even has gone so far to say that he was sorry for starving millions of children and women in Iraq. Now...What about your son, Camel? Where is he?

Saddam: Camel is working on a special project in Niveneh.

Kristiane: Do you know that your boots are muddy. Even though you have gassed hundreds of thousands of your own people, want to put nuclear bombs in everyone's capital and kills billions of people, I feel the urge to get on my knees and lick your boots clean. May I.

Saddam: Of course, Kristiane. How could I ever turn down CNN?

*** END OF TRANSCRIPT ****

[Samuel Johnson]

My Dearest German Excellent Leader,

The people of Iraq wish to invite your foreign minister to Al Kut to sample the latest of our products from the spice farms and see if the Great Germany would like to set up a long-term deal to import said spices. We know this would break the NATO trade embargo but I think once you sample this particular spice, you will want it.

Love, Peace and Understanding,

Saddam Hussein.

P.S. Do you have any spare nukes? I promise I won't use them on you.

[Metaliturtle]

Poland begins purchasing ships from an unknown foreign contractor, Mack is up to something.

He could be buying submarines too, but no intel could be gathered on that.

The Army has successfully raided northeast Germany for some Fraulines and Beer.

Poland offers sausages and submarines with screen doors if Germany joins Warsaw, as well as an end to the raids.

Polish border fortified against Germany.

Mack porks hot German Chicks!!!

[Metaliturtle]

NOTE: Greenland is part of Denmark, it really shouldn't be under English Control

[Samuel Johnson]

Dear Mack,

Me love brat. Let's get together and annihilate somebody. Don't need any submarines with screen doors but sure could use some of the blueprints for said submarines. We have recently come across a quite delicious spice with the help of our friend Halie Sellasie and his Jamican followers. And of course, there's always that troublesome oil out in the desert you are always craving. Can we talk? Do you know anything about nuclear bombs?

Love, Peace, Understanding,

Saddam

P.S. The whore of babylon says hi.

[Metaliturtle]

Dear Saddam I can score you some brats and some plans, unfortunately,
I no have Kaboomer

I could use that oil tho, it'll help me grease my pans.

Tell that whore to leave me alone

Mack

[SKILORD]

Canada is starting to get worried those wacky American Newspeople would probably do all in their pwer to score Saddam a Nuke. He didn't want to see Montreal become a sarcrifice to lunacy. Unless of cours he forgot the capital of his own nation. Canuk laid back in his chair he was useless without some more sleep, if only these nightmares would stop.

[Tarquinius]

Dear Saddam,

Thanks for the most kind invitation. I hope you won't mind though, that we deal with some Polish scum first. I will be able to come to Iraq two days from now. I don't give a damn about this NATO embargo, I want revenge for the loss of Denmark!!

Kind regards,

Chancellor Wilhelm II