Home Defense

[MrFun]

Well, this morning, the Homeland Defense department decided that the duct tape defense system was a lame idea.

But I would like to thank President Bush and the Homeland Defense for proposing such a hi-tech, effective defense system.

So what is their proposal now -- trash duct tape in favor of clear, mail packaging tape?

I love 21st century technology.

[Mr. President]

Hey, even Tom Ridge has to do something to earn his big, fat paycheck.

-- Mr. President
"Give NASA the money and let them all starve!"

[SlowwHand]

The tape idea bordered on retardation.

[MrFun]

Apparently, there are lot of dupes out there, since a lot of stores across the nation ran out of duct tape ever since this official advice came out.

So glad Homeland Defense officials recovered some bit of common sense, and backed down from this stupid idea.

[MrFun]

Originally posted by SlowwHand
The tape idea bordered on retardation.

no sh*t


So what was President Bush's stand on this stupid idea from Homeland Defense, anyway?

[Mr. President]

Jay Leno thinks that the Department of Homeland Security is testing to see what they can get people to do.

"The only way to protect against Saddam's poison gas is to . . . soak a towel in spaghetti sauce and drape it over your head."

[SlowwHand]

Hey, now wait a sec.
If nothing else it stimulated the economy to a degree.

[MrFun]

Again, my question was -- what was President Bush's stand on the duct tape defense system?

[SlowwHand]

My guess? He hired a guy to do a job.
Bush has other things to do.

[GePap]

The President only has a few opinions, mainly on Iraq, tax cuts, religion and sanctity of life issues. The man has no opinons outside of that, at least as far as we can learn based on what he says in public.

The Department of Homeland Security was an idiotic monstrosity to construct, and a plague on the houses of all in Congress that voted for this thing

[Urban Ranger]

This provides comic relief for us outsiders.

[orange]

Originally posted by Mr. President
Jay Leno thinks that the Department of Homeland Security is testing to see what they can get people to do.

"The only way to protect against Saddam's poison gas is to . . . soak a towel in spaghetti sauce and drape it over your head."

so bush just wants to make us all greasy towel heads?

[The Mad Monk]

Excuse me while I sound stupid...

Duct tape is something you really, really want if you need to seal a room from, say, a chemical attack (there's a reason it's used for ductwork). Of course, you're usually better off leaving the area, but sometimes that's just not possible. You pick a room that has few openings and little ventilation, and set it up as your 'safe room'. you put in some water, a portable radio, some reading material, and the duct tape. Food if you want, but you'll probably be out of there in less than twenty-four hours (one way or the other), so it's not required. In the Event of an attack, shut your windows, go to the safe room and seal yourself in with the duct tape. After the all-clear, tear down the duct tape and go on your merry little way.

I picked this up in the first month after 9-11; I heard it's what the Isrealis had their citizens do when the first gulf war threatened.

[Skanky Burns]

Because, out of the billions of square meters of land available, you never know when the terrorists might choose to attack one right next to your house...

[Kropotkin]

Bush is obviously backed by something more powerfull than the oil industry; the duct tape industry!!