I found out I have a half-brother today

[SuperSneak]

Horse--you may be right, but I have no reason not to believe my birth mother's take. She's one of the most "real" people you'd ever care to meet and there is no reason not to believe her. She's given me other insights into his behavior after the "incident" that are enough to convince me of her veracity and his misdeed. Besides, if the guy is married with kids, do I have the right to disrupt his life like that, regardless of his previous role in the conception? It is often hard enough for me to maintain decent contact with my "new" family, let alone adding a whole different branch.
I've struggled with this one a lot.

[Static Universe]

Originally posted by NeOmega
I have a half brother somewhere in the world.... Damon Rutlidge.... don't know him so I don't really care to ever meet him...... I wonder if he knows he has three half siblings.....

I'm in the exact same situation. I have a half brother and wonder if he knows me and my brother and sister exist. He's about eighteen now and I dread the idea he might show up on my doorstep someday.

In a similar situation, I had a new cousin suddenly materialize last year. She's the daughter of my uncle that nobody knew even existed. I felt pretty bad about it because she wanted her father at her college graduation, only to find out he had died of cancer about 6 years ago.

[Buck Birdseed]

Just to break up the general gloom, I'd like to report that I have two half-brothers and a half-sister, and it's a rare occurence during the time I spend in Sweden that I do not meet at least one of them every day, and all of them weekly. My oldest brother just moved into a house in the same block as my parents'...

[Rufus T. Firefly]

I'm adopted; according to the court papers attached to the adoption, my mother was a minor when I was born. My father is listed as "deceased," but this was probably just early-1960s-speak for "out of the picture." (Before I knew this for sure, whenever my friends would call me a bastard, I'd say, "yeah, probably." It's not easy being right all the time. )

Given my bio-mom's young age when I was born, I have to assume that I have half-siblings out there somewhere. I'd never think of looking for them now, because my Mom is still alive and I think it would break her heart if I went looking for bio-mom. But I never really thought about how it would affect the bio-family I found. How is it affecting your family, Diss?

Good luck with it all.

[Alexander's Horse]

Originally posted by SuperSneak
Horse--you may be right, but I have no reason not to believe my birth mother's take. She's one of the most "real" people you'd ever care to meet and there is no reason not to believe her. She's given me other insights into his behavior after the "incident" that are enough to convince me of her veracity and his misdeed. Besides, if the guy is married with kids, do I have the right to disrupt his life like that, regardless of his previous role in the conception? It is often hard enough for me to maintain decent contact with my "new" family, let alone adding a whole different branch.
I've struggled with this one a lot.

Hmm, I think redemption and forgiveness are very important. We all make mistakes, lots of biggies. It might mean a lot to him if you reached out. Maybe he's suffering about it. If he has children of his own he probably sees all that in quite a different light now. He might be quite a different man and need some closure and maybe you do too. His children are your brothers and sisters. They are Aunts and Uncles to your kids. That's heavy. Do they have a right to know you? Does Prosper? Maybe there's a happy ending there.

Its a common reaction for adopted children to see the worst in a birth parent. It can be a grief/rejection thing. The psychic wound is very deep. There's a lot of feelings to work through.

What strikes me about your situation is you are very very fortunate to know who both your birth parents are. That's very rare. If he died and you hadn't made contact, how would you feel?

[Agathon]

This sort of thing has happened to a couple of friends of mine. They got in contact and have never regretted it.

One of my mother's old workmates didn't find out that she was adopted until after her (adoptive) mother died; she has since contacted her birth mother and has a strong relationship with her now.

In most cases things go well - the other person is after all a close relative of yours and blood is thicker than water.

Good luck what ever you decide. You are a brave man either way.

[Frankychan]

Diss,

Think of it this way, now you aren't alone and you gained a brother now....don't think of him as a "stranger". You're a very lucky man to have a brother. I've always wanted one but never did.

[Tiamat]

Sneak isn't the only one on the board who is adopted. That's right.....this ole' dragon was adopted when she was 4 days old. My parents were always very open and honest with me since my childhood. When I was old enough to read they bought me a book called The Choosen Baby. It explained all about adoption and how the parents who got this baby really wanted it. They let me know that I was a choosen baby etc... I've always known that I was but it does leave a small (for me large for others) void in your life always looking in the mirror and wondering if you look like someone out there. I was one of the lucky ones. I got great parents who loved me and spoiled me rotten

Amazingly enough my adopted mother and I looked very much alike until she passed away. I am currently trying to search for my biological parents.

[Berzerker]

I'm sorry to hear that, is he an amputee or was he born that way?

[Wittlich]

Congratulations on finding out that you have a half-brother Dissident. I myself have one step-brother, two-half brothers and two-half sisters.

[Dis]

well I was never alone. I have 2 other brothers . Guess I have 3 now.

I'm sure he lives on the east coast. As he was adopted in my mom's home state.

It all depends on if he wants to see my mother. I haven't contacted him, my mom has. So we'll see.

[MRT144]

my parents convinced me that they are supporting 20 other kids based on how much they spend on me.