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What other thread?
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Christianity: The belief that a cosmic Jewish Zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree... -
Jingle Bells ala Son of Svengoolie
Dashing through the snow
In a newly stolen jeep
Laugh at all the folks
And beat up every creep.
Then we mingle in
With the Folks who like to shop
And try and steal a purse or two
Before the call a cop
Oh Snatch a purse
Pocket pick, in the Yuletide crowd
When they find their wallet gone
They'll really hollar loud
But if they knew what we do
They would thank us more
For the real robbery
Is the prices in the storeChristianity: The belief that a cosmic Jewish Zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree...Comment
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Spinal Tap
Christmas With The Devil
The elves are dressed in leather
And the angels are in chains
(Christmas with the Devil)
The sugar plums are rancid
And the stockings are in flames
(Christmas with the Devil)
There's a demon in my belly
And a gremlin in my brain
There's someone up the chimney hole
And Satan is his name
The rats ate all the presents
And the reindeer ran away
(Christmas with the Devil)
There'll be no Father Christmas
'Cause it's Evils holiday
(Christmas with the Devil)
No bells in Hell
No snow below-
Silent Night, Violent Night
So come all ye unfaithful
Don't be left out in the cold
You don't need no invitation, no...
Your ticket is your soulChristianity: The belief that a cosmic Jewish Zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree...Comment
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So a Toque is a balaclava? Or just a hat in general?Originally posted by Asher
Not sure if you're being serious or not.
A toque is sometimes referred to as a "beanie" by Americans, or sometimes simply a hat.
Allow me to demonstrate:
I knew it was a hat, just wondered if it was a certain kind of hat.
ACK!
EDIT: You didn't reply just so you could post a pic did you?
Don't try to confuse the issue with half-truths and gorilla dust!Comment
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This thread was inspired by Twisted Holiday If you have Real Player, enjoy.
Christianity: The belief that a cosmic Jewish Zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree...Comment
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Isn't a balaclava something that also covers the neck?
A toque just covers the head + ears. It's just to keep warm in the winter is all."The issue is there are still many people out there that use religion as a crutch for bigotry and hate. Like Ben."
Ben Kenobi: "That means I'm doing something right. "Comment
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I'm gettin nothin for Christmas
I broke my bat on Jimmy's head;
Somebody snitched on me.
I hid a frog in sister's bed;
Somebody snitched on me.
I spilled some ink on Mommy's rug!
I made Tommy eat a bug!
Bought some gum with a penny slug!
Somebody snitched on me.
Oh, I'm gettin nothin for Christmas.
Mommy and Daddy are mad.
I'm gettin nothin for Christmas,
'Cause I ain't been nothin but bad.
I put a tack on teacher's chair;
Somebody snitched on me.
I tied a knot in Susie's hair;
Somebody snitched on me.
I did a dance on Mommy's plants!
Climbed a tree and tore my pants!
Filled the sugar bowl with ants!
Somebody snitched on me.
So, I'm gettin nothin for Christmas.
Mommy and Daddy are mad.
I'm gettin nothin for Christmas,
'Cause I ain't been nothin but bad.
I won't be seeing Santa Claus;
Somebody snitched on me.
He won't come to visit me 'cause
Somebody snitched on me.
Next year I'll be going straight.
Next year I'll be good, just wait!
I'd start now, but it's too late,
'Cause somebody snitched on me.
Oh, I'm gettin nothin for Christmas,
Mommy and Daddy are mad.
I'm gettin nothin for Christmas,
'Cause I ain't been nothin but bad.<p style="font-size:1024px">HTML is disabled in signatures
</p>Comment
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Isn't baclava a greek nut dessert…"mono has crazy flow and can rhyme words that shouldn't, like Eminem"
Drake Tungsten
"get contacts, get a haircut, get better clothes, and lose some weight"
Albert SpeerComment
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With pistachios!Tutto nel mondo è burlaComment
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You guys should turn this into a sticky thread. I have got to play "The Carol of the Old Ones" for my wife. She's an on again off again Wichan and would love to hear it. I hope I can find this thread again tomorrow."I say shoot'em all and let God sort it out in the end!Comment
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"bump""I say shoot'em all and let God sort it out in the end!Comment
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Bob River's xmas songs are the best!
12 Pains of Christmas
Yellow Snow
Chipmunks Roasting on an Open Fire
Osama Got Run Over By A Reindeer
Other notable funny Xmas songs
Christmas in Jail - Asleep At The Wheel
Leroy the Redneck Reindeer - No clue who sang this
Cheech and Chong talking about Santa.
I drink to one other, and may that other be he, to drink to another, and may that other be me!Comment
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bump"I say shoot'em all and let God sort it out in the end!Comment
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Not exactly the world's funniest Christmas song, but certainly the best.
Fairytale of New York - Shane McGowan and Kirsty McColl
It was Christmas Eve babe
In the drunk tank
An old man said to me, won't see another one
And then he sang a song
The Rare Old Mountain Dew
I turned my face away
And dreamed about you
Got on a lucky one
Came in eighteen to one
I've got a feeling
This year's for me and you
So happy Christmas
I love you baby
I can see a better time
When all our dreams come true
They've got cars big as bars
They've got rivers of gold
But the wind goes right through you
It's no place for the old
When you first took my hand
On a cold Christmas Eve
You promised me
Broadway was waiting for me
You were handsome
You were pretty
Queen of New York City
When the band finished playing
They howled out for more
Sinatra was swinging,
All the drunks they were singing
We kissed on a corner
Then danced through the night
The boys of the NYPD choir
Were singing "Galway Bay"
And the bells were ringing out
For Christmas day
You're a bum
You're a punk
You're an old slut on junk
Lying there almost dead on a drip in that bed
You scumbag, you maggot
You cheap lousy ******
Happy Christmas your arse
I pray God it's our last
I could have been someone
Well so could anyone
You took my dreams from me
When I first found you
I kept them with me babe
I put them with my own
Can't make it all alone
I've built my dreams around you
The boys of the NYPD choir
Were singing "Galway Bay"
And the bells were ringing out
For Christmas day"Love the earth and sun and animals, despise riches, give alms to every one that asks, stand up for the stupid and crazy, devote your income and labor to others, hate tyrants, argue not concerning God, have patience and indulgence toward the people, take off your hat to nothing known or unknown . . . reexamine all you have been told at school or church or in any book, dismiss whatever insults your own soul, and your very flesh shall be a great poem and have the richest fluency" - Walt WhitmanComment
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Ramonified X-mas
"Merry Christmas"
Merry Christmas, I don't want to fight tonight
Merry Christmas, I don't want to fight tonight
Merry Christmas, I don't want to fight tonight with you
Where is Santa? At his sleigh?
Tell me why is it always this way?
Where is Rudolph? Where is Blitzen, baby?
Merry Christmas, merry merry merry Christmas
All the children are tucked in their beds
Sugar-plum fairies dancing in their heads
Snowball fighting, it's so exciting baby
I love you and you love me
And that's the way it's got to be
I loved you from the start
'Cause Christmas ain't the time for breaking each other's hearts
Where is Santa? At his sleigh?
Tell me why is it always this way?
Where is Rudolph? Where is Blitzen, baby?
Merry Christmas, merry merry merry Christmas
All the children are tucked in their beds
Sugar-plum fairies dancing in their heads
Snowball fighting, it's so exciting baby
Yeah, yeah, yeah
I love you and you love me
And that's the way it's got to be
I loved you from the start
'Cause Christmas ain't the time for breaking each other's hearts
Merry Christmas, I don't want to fight tonight
Merry Christmas, I don't want to fight tonight
Merry Christmas, I don't want to fight tonight with youComment
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