women are the cause of all the world's problems

[jomateix]

This thread is for discover girls in Apolyton? I thought that was an extinct race!

[Snowflake]

Extinct no. Endangered maybe.

Originally posted by Urban Ranger


That's bad influence for your kid.

You've been around Spamski and DrSpam for way too long

If you want to talk like a guy, you got to talk like a guy.

[Tiamat]

Originally posted by jomateix
This thread is for discover girls in Apolyton? I thought that was an extinct race!

We do still exsist here from time to time. And to Mr. Fun's point if what I said early calssifies me as a femme nazi then pleh to them. As stated before, I would have loved to stay at home with my girls and not have had to work two jobs just to keep my head above water, but I had no choice. And I am a firm believer that if their father had been involved in their life at all things would be so much different for them.

They suffered not having me there, having me always be tired and worn out, having me come home from one job throw dinner on the table, give instructions for the night and then leave again all to support them because I had a husband that couldn't see past the nose on the end of his face. He chose to be pissed off at me and not pay child support to get at me when the reality was he didn't get at me he got at his children. In the end they suffered the most from lack of time with the only parent who was their for them, lack of money to do the basic things they wanted to do and most of all lack of support from a male role model.

I told him years ago that if he didn't start on some level, any level to be in their lives that when they got old enough they would turn a cold heart to him and it has come to pass. I'm a bit different in how I raised my girls instead of being the bitter ex-wife I chose to always not say anything when the subject of their father came up. I always thought it should be their choice to make their decision on how to feel about him. Not some misplaced left over anger from me, but for them to search their hearts and make up their own mind, unfortunatly for him they have which leaves him not knowing his new grandaughter or anything else that's going on in their lives. But that was his choice.

[blackice]

Tiamat Very unfortunate for your children, some people really do not see the whole picture do they? This dude hurt his kids, hurt you and hurt himself. Bonehead comes to mind if I may be so bold. I sincerely hope the scars of what he did did not blemish your children's outlook at life and marrage. I also hope they do not feel guilty or responsible for his actions. I doubt it though because it certainly looks like you had all the bases covered and responded to them and their needs extremely well.

Good post for some to remember for sure, it takes time, usually a few years for separated parents to focus on their kids and not the past. It's human nature. If you stick it out, bite your tongue and do what is the most important thing, do what is the best interest for your kids... Everyone benefits, especially the kids.

You made some good choices and I applaud your efforts and integrity. If no one has said it before WELL DONE!

Not that it matters much any more as it sounds like the kids are all grown up. If you need any help with getting back pay for child support. Email me I may be able to help.

[Tiamat]

Thank you. I made up my mind along time ago that it was their choice. Besides I already knew what an unmitigated a$$hole he was and that it wouldn't take long for them to figure it out. They've made phone contact with him but he talks only when it doesn't interfer with other things. My oldest daughter called him about 4 months ago and he told her I'm on the other line I'll call you back. Mind you she's calling him long distance and do you think he ever returned the call.....um no. She sat by the phone for 3 hours waiting.

And it's not them that feels responsible it's me. I'm the one that always has felt like crap because of the way he has treated them and it isn't just him this goes to his family as well. Over the years every time we moved or chaged numbers I always wrote his mother to inform them and him. When I got cancer I wrote and told them in case something went wrong.....nothing. And these are their grandparents. If you have children, stay in contact, be a parent because they didn't ask to be here you brought them here so you must stand responsible.

**steps off soapbox** ok. I'm done now.

[Tiamat]

Oh and as for the child support issue....well he didn't pay for ten years and seeing as how I'm a red head... I got pissed It's really amazing how quickly someone is willing to pay when you put their face, name and how much they owe on T.V.

[blackice]

Well I hope they give him a piece of their mind one day, he sounds like a non human to me. I mean these are his kids, part of him. One has to be pretty messed up not to want to care for your own.

you have children, stay in contact, be a parent because they didn't ask to be here you brought them here so you must stand responsible.

Well said

It's really amazing how quickly someone is willing to pay when you put their face, name and how much they owe on T.V.

Well done I hope it caused him great shame with his friends, co-workers, neighbors and family. I wonder how many know how he treated is kids all these years. I also have to wonder what his up bring was like, he truely sounds messed up.

[MrFun]

Originally posted by Tiamat

**steps off soapbox** ok. I'm done now.

The dragons are always welcomed to use the soap box whenever they want it.

[Tiamat]

Well done I hope it caused him great shame with his friends, co-workers, neighbors and family. I wonder how many know how he treated is kids all these years. I also have to wonder what his up bring was like, he truely sounds messed up.

By the time I even had arrived at the court house for our 10:00 court time he had already paid $9,000.00 and was willing to hand me a check for the other $20,000 if I would just make it stop. So yeah......it worked

[chequita guevara]

Originally posted by Ben Kenobi
That's an interesting stance. Most who find the remarks degrading also make a case against pornography.

Actually, a lot of modern feminists are pro-porn.

[blackice]

So in other words he had the cash all along. Has he gone for help for his problems yet? He should, it may make him a better person and by the sounds of it he still has room in the hearts of the kids for a trying come back.

Good job though money does not pay for the emotional crime of abandonment of your kids, but the kids and you deserve it none the less

[chequita guevara]

I wonder if there's a business in shaming deadbeat parents into paying up?

[blackice]

chegitz guevara There are many.

[MrFun]

Originally posted by Tiamat


By the time I even had arrived at the court house for our 10:00 court time he had already paid $9,000.00 and was willing to hand me a check for the other $20,000 if I would just make it stop. So yeah......it worked

You know your stuff.

[Shogun Gunner]

Originally posted by Tiamat
I'm a bit different in how I raised my girls instead of being the bitter ex-wife I chose to always not say anything when the subject of their father came up. I always thought it should be their choice to make their decision on how to feel about him. Not some misplaced left over anger from me, but for them to search their hearts and make up their own mind, unfortunatly for him they have which leaves him not knowing his new grandaughter or anything else that's going on in their lives. But that was his choice.

I'm honestly touched by your posting. Your experiences, although clearly not pleasant, have made you stronger and wiser. I admire you for enduring and succeeding despite huge obstacles and little support.