Plan the Perfect Crime

[DanielXY]

How is it diffrent if I choose to steal money or if I go on a psycho rampage? Both have the purpose to satisfy my disires ... hypothetically of course

[LDiCesare]

A crime like nuking the world would be perfect. Noone left to blame it on you. If you want to kill many people, it's a good one. 'Just' get your hands on some nuke from ex USSR or highjack a submarine.

[DanielXY]

Your plan lacks in details LDiCesare!
How exactly can I highjack the submarine? Can I operate a submarine alone (probably to much work to learn it all )? The Nukes on a submarine are not enoughto anhilate the complete world. To much survivors to blame me afterwards etc. pp.
Your concept lacks in all important points. Fix it!

[Az]

That might be harder than it sounds.

[Turambar]

So, how would YOU plan the perfect crime? What would you do, and how would you NOT get caught?

I wouldn't plan it on an internet message board for a start.

[Pyaray]

Originally posted by Turambar
I wouldn't plan it on an internet message board for a start.

Ah, but you see, the perfect plan is so perfect that it doesn't matter if the hero knows about it or not, so you could post it all over the place, and it would be so perfect that it still couldn't be stopped.


Let's see, the perfect plan for crime.... Hmm.... I know, we start charging people for auto insurance, but we charge far more than we would ever pay out even if every single person got into an accident. No wait, that's already been done....

OK, we charge healthy people for healthcare, call it an HMO.... no.... wait, that's been done too.

Oh well, I'm fresh out of new ideas. Seems like all the good ones are taken.

Pyaray

[Sandman]

Get a job at a small supermarket in a provincial town. Pay particular attention to where the alcohol is stored, and any security weaknesses.

Come back at 3am with some friends and a transit van. Smash your way into the storage area, and lift as much high-value alcohol as you can in one hour. If you empty the storage area, proceed to the shop floor and continue lifting alcohol (and DVDs and other high value stuff).

At 4am, set off with your fully-laden transit van into the night. Since it's a provincial town, there won't be much in the way of CCTV cameras or police patrols.

Make sure all your friends were wearing gloves, hats and shoes. Dispose of the shoes once you're safely away. You don't need to worry about DNA evidence; the supermarket will be awash with the DNA of all sorts of people. Sell on the products in some discrete fashion.

[Sava]

First, I'll need to have my sister become governor of a swing state. Then, I will help her revoke the voting rights of ten's of thousands of voters that would probably vote for the other party. Then, I'll help her institute a corruptable voting system so she can manipulate votes. Then, I'll be sure to buy some key Supreme Court Justices. Then, I'll run for president, and when the swing state voting comes into question and a recall is ordered, I'll use my corrupt Supreme Court Justices to stop the measure and claim victory as PRESIDENT.


oh wait, that one is already taken...

[LDiCesare]

The Nukes on a submarine are not enoughto anhilate the complete world.

Start by nuking for example China, I'm pretty sure they'll retaliate against anybody. Or, more subtly, nuke Japan. and blame Korea.
As for taking the sub, everyone knows a diplomat with enough gold can subvert it.

Now if you want a perfect crime, just go and kill a beggar. Nobody cares, and the police won't spend a lot of time figuring what happened.

[Az]

What's perfect about it? what's the purpose of the crime? What's the fun?

OMG, it's like "American Psycho" all over again

[ajbera]

The Perfect Murder: Five Great Mystery Writers Create the Perfect Crime by Jack Hitt and others.

Out of print, but a great book. Author Hitt creates a scenario - a man whose wife is cheating on him with his best friend. The man wants to kill the wife and frame the best friend for the murder.

Hitt proposd this scenario to 5 famous crime writers - Lawrence Block, Sarah Caudwell, Tony Hillerman, Peter Lovesey, and Donald E. Westlake - and asked how they would plan to do this. They responded. he then sent each response to the other writers for a critique, and received their responses. All responses from each author are in the book, and each has distinct way of accomplishing the deed. One author (Cauldwell, IIRC) suggested something rather gothic and old-fashioned, one propsed hiding the murder during a mass poisoning, another (Block) said the would-be murderer should kill 4 or 5 others, then kill the wife, then plant evidence at the best friend's house to make him look like a serial killer. Just a really, really cool book if this sort of thing is up your alley (as it is mine).

Again, it's out of print, but probably can be obtained through a library or OOP bookseller (www.abebooks.com).

[Lord Merciless]

Easy: when I want to kill someone, I would snipe a couple of random persons first, then kill my target from a safe distance. That's I would get rid of pesky bosses without invoking suspicion.

The other method is sending dangerous stuffs (such as Anthrax tainted letter disguised as commercials) through the mail, you will never get caught.

Of course, the absolute perfect crime is to psychologically manipulating someone to do your dirty work, but that's awfully hard to achieve.

[LDiCesare]

Why manipulate someoen else to kill? Manipulate your prey so they commit suicide. I know some persons I could easily kill that way (or at least get rid of).

[Lord Merciless]

Originally posted by LDiCesare
Why manipulate someoen else to kill? Manipulate your prey so they commit suicide. I know some persons I could easily kill that way (or at least get rid of).

Not a boss who is a complete ******* but otherwise mentally perfectly stable.

[Az]

Scary thing is, that I feel like I am capable of killing. I just have a very strong self-restraint.