How do you be confident?

[Dis]

People say this all the time. They say "be confident". Well how in the hell do you be confident? If I knew how to be confident, I'd be confident already.

I hear heroin instills its users with confidence. But I don't like needles. I don't like drugs either.

any ideas?

[Sava]

I dunno, I'm highly confident... but I suspect I could be categorized as a sociopath.

[Elok]

Sociopath? I figured you were on a perpetual bad-acid trip at worst. But I don't think anyone here would call you a *sociopath*...
Anyway, confidence can be acquired to some degree by playing mind games with yourself. Circular reasoning, for example. The people who hate you are mean, and by your standards bad people, therefore they aren't the kind of people you respect, therefore their opinions do not matter or affect you. Wrap yourself in a protective blanket of arrogance and condescension and nothing can hurt you or reach you. Except punches in the face, which hurt and happen quite frequently if you follow the advice I've just given you. That's why I said screw it, and waited for confidence to come to me. It took a few years, but it worked.
Alternately, you said you don't like drugs. Do you classify alcohol as a "drug" in that sense? If you're the right kind of drunk a night of boozing can teach you that no real harm comes from asserting yourself.

[chequita guevara]

Fake it, after a while you'll start to believe your won bull****, which is what being confident is all about.

[Imran Siddiqui]

If I knew how to be confident, I'd be confident already.

So true . Catch 22, eh?

[Sava]

Sociopath? I figured you were on a perpetual bad-acid trip at worst. But I don't think anyone here would call you a *sociopath*...

you don't know me in real life

[Ted Striker]

The whole "confident" thing is just some buzz word that's been thrown around in the last 5 years. It's kinda silly really. Just pay attention to the latest commercials and you'll see it being thrown around many times.

Chegitz actually has pretty good advice.

A more true approach is to find something you are good at and enjoy doing it and don't make apologies to anyone for it.

[Immortal Wombat]

Fix an enigmatic smile on your face at all times.

Remember that nothing (mostly) you say or do matters to anyone for more than about 5 minutes following it.

Pretend that everyone looking at you is in fact respectfully gazing at you in awe and wonderment.

[Agathon]

Why do so many people hate Sava? I think he's great and easily has the best avatars on Poly?

[Soul Survivor]

alcohol usually does the trick for me

[Ted Striker]

[Dis]

alcohol does work. the problem is it can be difficult to be drunk all the time . Well difficult for me. Some people can do it.

In fact, I have vowed to drink a few beers before every date now. I figure it's better they think I'm an alcoholic, instead of some shy nerd with no confidence

[Zylka]

Re: How do you be confident?

Originally posted by Dissident
People say this all the time. They say "be confident". Well how in the hell do you be confident? If I knew how to be confident, I'd be confident already.

I hear heroin instills its users with confidence. But I don't like needles. I don't like drugs either.

You can snort, smoke, or put heroin under your tongue. If you want an illicit social confidence drug, however - cocaine or MDMA

If you want a legit social confidence drug? Look into SSRIs. In most other (and in combintion) cases , confidence comes in time - so you have to stick out the nervousness and try again for as many years as it takes.

That's the truth!

[Soul Survivor]

Originally posted by Dissident
alcohol does work. the problem is it can be difficult to be drunk all the time . Well difficult for me. Some people can do it.

In fact, I have vowed to drink a few beers before every date now. I figure it's better they think I'm an alcoholic, instead of some shy nerd with no confidence

unless you plan on making 8 figures anytime soon, yes

[Elok]

Originally posted by Agathon
Why do so many people hate Sava? I think he's great and easily has the best avatars on Poly?

I don't HATE him; it's just that, if you think Jesus and Dubya are conspiring to kill you all the time, you have issues. But he's a very likable nut. Yay, Sava.
Also, he doesn't seem to take it personally, does he?