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"The Italian Job" to be butchered

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  • #1

    "The Italian Job" to be butchered

    According to the banner ad I saw on yahoo.ca, coming may 30 is a hollywood remake of the classic michael caine 'the Italian job', with the usually 20 something 'hairdos' of this generation.

    Get Carter was the last Michael Caine remake: it had some saving graces
    -Michael Caine is in it.
    -Things blow up OK (not as violent as the original; the computer porn concept was stupid)


    but a lot of lemons:
    -Jack is Stallone, so he has to be remade into a bruiser-type
    -tacked on crap happy ending
    -Jack is way too moral; in the original he killed all the time in nasty ways.

    Now the Italian Job is a great Michael Caine brit-gangster movie. It has probably some of the greatest car chase scenes in movie history.

    Even the top of the famous factory in Turin!

    But its going to be ruined by a bunch of 21st century 'mussed hair and goatee' ****ers!!

    CONSOLATION PLEASE.
    "Wait a minute..this isn''t FAUX dive, it's just a DIVE!"
    "...Mangy dog staggering about, looking vainly for a place to die."
    "sauna stories? There are no 'sauna stories'.. I mean.. sauna is sauna. You do by the laws of sauna." -P.
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  • #2
    Hey! Thou shalt not badmouth Donald Sutherland!

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    • #3
      So are they at least going to have a Mini Cooper in this version?
      Try http://wordforge.net/index.php for discussion and debate.

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      • #4
        Are they going to leave the audience hanging in hopes of a sequel this time?
        I make no bones about my moral support for [terrorist] organizations. - chegitz guevara
        For those who aspire to live in a high cost, high tax, big government place, our nation and the world offers plenty of options. Vermont, Canada and Venezuela all offer you the opportunity to live in the socialist, big government paradise you long for. –Senator Rubio

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        • #5
          Another boring remake will be upon us.
          I watched you fall. I think I pushed.

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          • #6
            Originally posted by Oerdin
            So are they at least going to have a Mini Cooper in this version?
            According to Salon, that's the best thing about this movie.
            Christianity: The belief that a cosmic Jewish Zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree...

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            • #7
              "According to Salon, that's the best thing about this movie"

              Ugh...
              "Wait a minute..this isn''t FAUX dive, it's just a DIVE!"
              "...Mangy dog staggering about, looking vainly for a place to die."
              "sauna stories? There are no 'sauna stories'.. I mean.. sauna is sauna. You do by the laws of sauna." -P.

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              • #8
                What are they doing coming in here and making such a fracas? They were only supposed to blow the bloody doors off.

                I want to get hold of the people responsible for this and give them a good going-over. Not killed, mind you. Just given a good going-over.

                Maybe the Americans aren't the kind of people who recognise young talent and are willing to give it a chance after all?

                Get the wheels in li ... get the wheels in line with it!

                Hang on a minute lads ... I've had an idea ......
                If I'm posting here then Counterglow must be down.

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                • #9
                  eddie norton is in it though, he's one of my fav actors.
                  "I've lived too long with pain. I won't know who I am without it. We have to leave this place, I am almost happy here."
                  - Ender, from Ender's Game by Orson Scott Card

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                  • #10
                    yeah Ed Norton
                    "Chegitz, still angry about the fall of the Soviet Union in 1991?
                    You provide no source. You PROVIDE NOTHING! And yet you want to destroy capitalism.. you criminal..." - Fez

                    "I was hoping for a Communist utopia that would last forever." - Imran Siddiqui

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                    • #11
                      Yeah, Edward Norton's cool.

                      Mark Wahlberg is playing Charlie Croker, though. That ain't cool. That's a crime.
                      If I'm posting here then Counterglow must be down.

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                      • #12
                        Originally posted by DinoDoc
                        Are they going to leave the audience hanging in hopes of a sequel this time?
                        Awful, truly awful.
                        One day Canada will rule the world, and then we'll all be sorry.

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                        • #13
                          I liked the Ocean's Eleven remake. This sound similar.
                          Blog | Civ2 Scenario League | leo.petr at gmail.com

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                          • #14
                            the trailer for this movie is SO horrible... I'm an Ed Norton fan too, but he clearly is phoning this role in (I heard that he only did this due to contractual obligations).
                            "mono has crazy flow and can rhyme words that shouldn't, like Eminem"
                            Drake Tungsten
                            "get contacts, get a haircut, get better clothes, and lose some weight"
                            Albert Speer

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                            • #15
                              Originally posted by Big Crunch
                              Awful, truly awful.
                              eh?
                              I make no bones about my moral support for [terrorist] organizations. - chegitz guevara
                              For those who aspire to live in a high cost, high tax, big government place, our nation and the world offers plenty of options. Vermont, Canada and Venezuela all offer you the opportunity to live in the socialist, big government paradise you long for. –Senator Rubio

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