A few tips for would be 'authors'.

[Alexander's Horse]

Originally posted by vovansim

I honestly don't see why you people have started bashing each other.

Sorry - I have to correct there

We're not bashing each other - we're laughing at Lucarse

Who, based on what we have seen of his writing skills, has no right to lecture others on good writing.

Just ignore him and get on with your stories

[ChaotikVisions]

Really quite a rude post. I don't think anyone here is prepping for writing a novel, or going into a similar career. People are just trying their hand at writing storys, some are good, some aren't, but all of them are at least worthy of some respect for them to have done it at all. I've only read a couple storys I didn't like on here, most i've enjoyed. Typos or grammar mistakes really don't matter that much so long as you can tell what it is.

All your post would serve to do is discourage people who are writing storys currently from posting them. Simply because you didn't agree with their use of a word or the fact that they mispelled something. Noone here is writing a true book, its just short storys. A few typos here and there don't matter, its about the person writing it enjoying it.

Some work could be done on grammar or spelling I agree, but does it matter that much? Not really. No one (besides you, I guess) is judging short storys on simple things like grammar and spelling. Attacking people for it is just rude and serves no purpose. Also, as "impressive" as having three papers is, I must ask where is your story?

To criticize others you must have quite a good one of your own, right? I'd love to hear it so long as it fits the theme. And don't worry, every makes typos and spelling mistakes so i'll ignore the ones its bound to have. Anyway, just my thoughts.

[Alexander's Horse]

Originally posted by ChaotikVisions

All your post would serve to do is discourage people who are writing storys currently from posting them.

Really? All I'm saying is let it all hang out, have fun, get your spelling and grammar wrong, who cares? If English is your second language, don't be inhibited - most people here just want to read your story.

The only reason we're picking up that moron Lucarse on his spelling and syntax is because he's trying to set himself up as some sort of English language policeman and story critic when his own English skills are frankly laughable.

So I laugh

We in fact thought his posts must be some kind of joke -surely noone could write that badly and presume to critique others?

We were wrong

[ChaotikVisions]

My whole post was directed at him(Lucarse) Alexander.

[Alexander's Horse]

Right

[Boris Godunov]

This thread should be archived. Someone writes a lecture about good writing that is riddled with spelling and grammar mistakes, and it turns into one of the funniest things on these boards.

We'll give Lucarse the easy out and let him claim that the initial post was satire.

(Or just let him fess up to being AH's DL...)

[Tuberski]

Re: A few tips for would be 'authors'.

Originally posted by Lucarse
Ok, This may be offensive to some 'authors' who have posted here, hopefully no more offensive than their appalling abuse of the English language.

Although I would not want to discourage anybody from writing stories based on civ games, as for the most part I enjoy them,
however PLEASE take a few of the following points into consideration before undertaking another civ epic.

SPELLING: Write it out in a text editor with a spell checker, there is nothing more frustrating than spelling mistakes, or repeated words.

GRAMMAR: There are rules about this if you don't know what they are, find out. Inappropriate use of punctuation makes a story very difficult to read, the dramatic pause is a much maligned/forgotten tool.

SENTANCE STRUCTURE: if you don't understand this don't try and write anything longer than your name.
Proper sentences and paragraphs break up the story, add pauses, and stop it from turning into a breathless rant (not unlike this thread).

MEANINGLESS DIALOGUE: 'Have a nice day' said the president 'yes you to' said the solider. THIS IS POINTLESS ANOYING FILLER stop it, it has absolutely no use! it turns an interesting piece of writing into a book for 3 year olds, See Spot Run, See Spot etc...

WORD DEFFINITIONS: If you don't know or are unsure about the meaning of a word, look up it or simply don't use it.
There is nothing better at making you look an 'illiterate gimp' as the inappropriate/misuse of words. e.g.

'he was enraptured by the stunning vista ' not technically incorrect but the word Enrapture really means an Ecstasy or to transport with delight it has slightly religious overtones.
It’s a clumsy use; a better example to use would be 'Awed' or 'Taken By'. It would be a good opportunity here for a juxtaposition (look it up) Example:

'On rounding the brow of the hill he was taken by the beauty arrayed before him a stunning vista of mountains, forests and plains. For such life/beauty to exist in such cruel landscape (meaning political, social, ethical) seemed obscene to the solider.'

MEANINGLESS FLOWERY DESCRIPTIONS:
Think about the description you're trying to convey e.g.:
Bullets Rip the air not humm/buzz or any other mundane wanderings.
Explosions Render, Crump, Balloon not fizz or explode the statement 'Explosions exploded around him' is completely redundant!

To illustrate this look at the following,
This is possibly the best use of descriptive language in modern literature.
It is the opening first chapter to 'The Lord Of The Flies' Read on...

The boy with the fair hair lowered himself down the last few feet of rock and began to pick his way toward the lagoon.
Though he had taken off his school sweater and trailed it now from one hand, his grey shirt stuck to him and his
hair was plastered to his forehead. All round him the long scar smashed into the jungle was a bath of heat.
He was clambering heavily among the creepers and broken trunks when a bird, a vision of red and yellow,
flashed upwards with a witchlike cry; and this cry was echoed by another.

This paragraph describes the boy, the surroundings, the mood and the environment in one go. You can almost feel muggy steamy heat of the jungle and the scratchy undergrowth.

Although not everybody can be William Golding, but with a bit of practice your writing will be better for it if you take consideration of the points outlined here.

If anybody has a few ideas that I have missed please fell free to add them here, id like to see your suggestions.

NOTE: I apologise to the authors if they recognise their work in my examples, I have only used these as stand out cases, and it is not a reflection on the quality of the entire 'work'.

And I don't have an MA in English Lit.


ACK!

[ChrisiusMaximus]

Aside from the onslaught on Mr Lucarse there is a lot of interest in this thread. Its a pity those of you who have found the time to indulge yourselves in this do not show your support for the writers here yourselves.

There are a lot of names here who I have rarely if ever seen give feedback to the stories. Oh yes your content to read the goods but cant be arsed to show your appreciation. As I posted earlier people who live in glass houses should not throw stones.

I think we can all agree that Lucarse has made a few errors in his posts, perhaps he will now learn the benefit of humility and reflect on this before his next attempt to convert the masses.

But to the rest of the agitators I say grow up. At least go away and leave those of us who want to support eachother and further the creativity of this forum to get on with what we do best, writing stories. As for you Mr Horse thank you so much for giving us permission to continue to do so, dont bother responding unlike our mutual friend I have no difficulty in ignoring gob****es!

To all those who have seen this who are regular writers and contributors here I ask you, do you really want this forum to sink to these depths. Ok Scratch and Tom I know you found it amuseing but come on be honest, we all know how important feedback is. Do we really want to be insulted by empty heads who have nothing better to do than gang up on one person. Maybe Lucarse failed to get his point over correctly but before the vultures descended there had been some sensible replies to his points.

I did not and still do not agree with him but I see no reason to personally attack him. I dare say that AH and others have themselves never made any mistakes.

[unscratchedfoot]

We gotta give Lucerne credit for starting this thread and entertaining us. He sounds like a writer of those excruciatingly boring thesis's we were assigned to read in university but never did because they neither made sense nor gave us enough stimulation to keep from falling asleep. These "intellectual" types really aren't in my cool book. They only look for ways to criticize others and try, hopelessly in vain, to look intelligent. I also teach english and know all the grammar types like conditional types, pronoun-antecedent agreements, conjunctive adverbs etc etc but really have no desire to say anything bad to our writers here, especially since I probably left a few errors in my own piece.

[Alexander's Horse]

Originally posted by ChrisiusMaximus
Its a pity those of you who have found the time to indulge yourselves in this do not show your support for the writers here yourselves.

There are a lot of names here who I have rarely if ever seen give feedback to the stories. Oh yes your content to read the goods but cant be arsed to show your appreciation.

What are you talking about? I'm a big fan of your work

*clap, clap, clap*

Happy now?

I think we can all agree that Lucarse has made a few errors in his posts

See? That's why I'm such a big fan - you are an absolute master of understatement

As for you Mr Horse thank you so much for giving us permission to continue to do so, dont bother responding unlike our mutual friend I have no difficulty in ignoring gob****es!

Is that the way to talk to one of your biggest fans?

Before you said you wanted feedback and now you don't

[SKILORD]

I've been told repeatedly to use word 1st to fix my mistakes but i find i cannot because, well I just can't. That takes the random feeling writing this stuff has always held for me away and i can't write this like that.

[ChrisiusMaximus]

Oh well if your a fan then I suppose I can forgive you, but please can we stop this unecessary abuse. If you can accept my apology for losing it with you then I think nuff said.

[Alexander's Horse]

I will, I will

[ChrisiusMaximus]

Well its been fun but Im off to bed now. I wonder if Lucarse will bother returning to this, not if hes got any sense!

[Urban Ranger]

Horsie man, the neighbourhood becomes scary with you around.