Succession game "The Morons"

[dunk]

Tarqiniosis was a similar name... He's one of your relatives.

[randommushroom]

Okay, I'll grab it when I get home from work today, and play immediately thereafter.

[randommushroom]

Big news shows up in the brief summary. Some notes following. I am just attaching the save file since zipping it doesn't compress it all that much.

Pre-turn:

Queen Rando checks the state of moron affairs. The science guy says we're technologically advanced, but he needs more money. What a moron! He's obviously doing fine with the pittance, and I've got plenty of money to spend on ivory jewelry and fur coats.

360-1
370-2
380-3 The Queen notices that Shaka has sent an archer into our land. I tell him to get out and he declares war. I go talk to Alexander and he agrees to join in the fight against Shaka for 190 gold.

390-4
400-5 Impi swarms begin swarming around.
410-6 A lot of cities finish things. The Queen roars, "Give me Samurai." She settles for Swordsmen.
420-7
430-8
440-9
450-10 Hideous news! We don't know who they are, but the Russians have built the Great Library in Moscow. I'm so angry I want to declare war, but my foreign advisor says he doesn't know who to tell it to. We won't rest until every single Russian city is captured or put to the torch!


--So on her deathbed Queen Rando issued her dying decree. That the Russians would be hunted down, pillaged, and slaughtered. And the Great Library wiped from the world.

Now on a less moronic note: I saw that the hills near Yokohama were being mined. This isn't the best idea, under despotism we would only get two shields from a mined hill. But if we mine the shielded grasslands, we'll get two shields per tile. Obviously, the workers can get that done faster than roading and mining a hill.

The other thing (yeah, I'm kinda zealous about how to use workers, is that it is also generally better to clear forest/jungle before roading it. It takes 5 turns to put a road through forest or jungle, from a cleared tile it is only three turns. So you save a couple turns here, a couple turns there. That can add up. I will make exceptions when a city needs to get connected to the road net, or a luxury, but we've got an excess of luxuries now, so the primary order should be clear, then build the road.

Tarq, I didn't get the offensive against the Zulus going. Spent much of the war defending the city Hakodate, and also get other troops in to position. The Colossus is almost finished.

So we are going to end up in a war on another continent at some point. I suggest that our aims now will be to secure this continent, and not build a Forbidden Palace here. Or I don't know. Maybe an FP here will do the trick, but it would be nice to get a good production center near to the action.

[dunk]

I mined the hills. I figure we'll be switching to Monarchy soon enough.

[Tarquinius]

Emperor Tarquinius Superbus rises as emperor of the Japanese in 460 AD

470 AD: Our troops destroy Umfolozi! The Zulu leader wants to talk with Tarquinius but the emperor sends him away.
480 AD: Our scientist discovers the secret of monarchy. Tarquinius doesn't understand the purpose of this. "Why should we need a king, we already have an emperor!"
490 AD-520 AD: Our troops are fighting heavily against the zulu mobs. Our forces advance slowly though. No great leader
530 AD: Ise is founded!! We destroy Zunguin and Isipezi in the same turn.
540 AD: Our troops advance further south, towards the main zulu cities!
550 AD: A revolution is raging in the Japanese empire! Warriors and priests want a new sort of government, called Monarchy. They say it is good for the growth of our cities. The emperor was killed in Kyoto when the revolutionary troops attacked the royal palace... And he could well be the last Japanese emperor, as the revolutionary forces have overthrown the governors in all cities in the end of the year!
Who knows what happens next...

[Tarquinius]

I think we can destroy the zulus quite easily, because they are being distracted by the Greeks. It might take a while but as we don't have war weariness that doesn't really matter much.
The Colossus was built. I built a cathedral in Kyoto and Edo, because they are gowing quite big already. If we can snatch Sistine, we should build them everywhere.

Btw, I will be out of town for a few days, I will be back on tuesday, and will probably be able to play on wednesday.
Take care until then

[randommushroom]

Are Impis still running all over the place? Man when the war started it was like opening up a hornet's nest.

[randommushroom]

Tarq, Tarq, attach the game! The game!

[Tarquinius]

Oh I always seem to forget that

Nah the impis are running back to their own land and Greece it seems.

[dunk]

It's my turn now, right?

[randommushroom]

Yes.

[dunk]

The warriors and priests figure out that Dunk V should be their new "King". And so, King Dunk V decides that his pointy hat should have 5 points. One for each Dunk that has reigned Moronland.

550.. The monarchy is established.

560... Ho hum.

570... The Greeks take the Zulu city of Intombe.

580... The Zulu city of Tugela is razed. The Morons find 6 shiny things and 4 slave workers. The Greeks and the Zulu sign a peace treaty.

590... Ho hum.

600... Ho hum.

610... Dunk V sees that Pharsalos is threatened by Zulu forces, so he drags the Greeks back into the war to protect it. He pays Alexander Monarchy, a world map, and 50 shiny things.

620... Toyama is founded on the northern pennisula. Dunk V's ploy works as Greek forces divert the Zulus away from Pharsalos. The Zulu begin construction of Sun Tzu's Art of War.

630... Swazi is razed to the ground. 4 slave workers are captured.

640... Dunk V's glorious reign comes to an end when Dunk decides to press the triangle shaped button in the upper left hand corner of his map.

[Tarquinius]

Is this game going to continue?
It is Randomturns turn, but if he doesn't play in two days I will skip his round for now.

[randommushroom]

Sorry about the delay in posting.

Preturn:

Queen Rando comes back to power. She is pleased to find out no one can read, and then begins to make some decisions. Yokohma is changed to a galley, and hurried. Yep, the Queen is going on a shopping spree. Tokyo is changed to a palace that'll eventually be turned into a place for Sun-Tzu, so he can teach the guys how to fight. She also begins to look for ways to hire a guy named Leonardo Spearman rushed in Salamanca to keep the morons happy, as well as looking to free up the swordsman. Temple rushed in Ise.

660 AD (2) Elite swordman dies attacking Impi escort for settler. Damn Impi almost kills vet swordsman too.

670 AD The morons celebrate by adding to the palace of Queen Rando. Second spearman hurried in Salamanca.

680 AD The morons plant trees in front of the palace. Queen Rando decides to hurry the temple in Toyama.

700 AD Galley that was sent into the darkness sinks. Spearman hurried in Ise. Elite troops attack Impi, no great leader produced. In between turns, Greece and Zululand sign peace treaty.

710 AD The morons add a wing to the palace. Fukushima founded.

720 AD The morons add another wing to the palace. 4 celebrations in 50 years, Queen Rando is quite pleased. Hlobane is destroyed.

730 AD Another palace addition. Ephesus, a city of Greece, decides to join us. Zulus are producing pikemen. Alexander, that rat-faced jerk, is furious with us. Fine. Queen Rando decides to make a change. I go demand a couple of cities from Alex, he refuses. I declare war and now go talk to Shaka. He gives us Feudalism and a millitary alliance versus the Greeks for a peace treaty and 100 gold.

760 AD Taking an extra turn. Yokohama managed to maximize production with no extra food while it builds aqueduct.

770 AD Another continent spotted by galley--will it survive to make contact next turn? Rhodes destroyed.

780 AD Galley sinks. Kagoshima's aqueduct hurried, will build galley next. Thessalonica captured.

810 AD Took a few extra turns while shifting forces towards the Greeks.

Endnotes: A galley sank but spotted the borders of another continent. So keep building galleys in Kagoshima and try to make contact. We are working on Sun-Tzu's and I have another city set to building a palace that we'll convert over to Leonardo's. One thing to note: If we get great leaders, it is better to hurry something for as many shields as possible.

By that, I mean that if we have a city working on a great wonder, and we get a great leader, send him to that city. But first switch that city to another improvement, hurry it with money, and then use the great leader to do the wonder after that.

[dunk]

I beleive Leonardo's Workshop is a scientific wonder. Which would be a no-no under the Moron Code of Stupidity.