The Flight of the Pheonix

[Paddy]

1080ad

the war has slowed down quite a bit

Large numbers of Byzantine Infantry and Guerillas are attacking my forces

[marcuspeddle]

Ah, sorry to hear. Could you send me a map next turn?

The Arabs are sending a lot of people north through my territory. I guess they are fortifying their artic cities. Maybe they'll give me something for a right of passage agreement.

In Rome:Total War I am playing a long campaign as the Britons. I've just been gangraped by the Gauls and the Germanic tribes so I've lost all my continental holdings. Ah, well, the British Isles are a nice place to live.
Hours of fun -- even when you're getting slaughtered.

[Paddy]

map next turn

TW sounds cool

1090ad

[marcuspeddle]

To the Glorious Leader of the Celts

These days my people are grumbling about their neighbours and even my first rate propogandists cannot distribute pro-Celt pamphlets fast enough to check demonstrations and Letters to the Editor.
The people say that the Celts are not pulling their weight in our alliance and while we send you gold, technology, maps, and copies of Cleopatra does Cairo, the Celts have not contibuted anything to our science or our treasury. In fact, they say, they cannot even be bothered to send tourist maps of their country.
I am trying to placate my people and convince them of the potential help you represent should we be attacked by a hostile nation. They say we are on friendly terms with everyone so why do we need to pay protection money to a nation that assaults its neighbours every second turn?
Despite the grumblings of my people, we're still on for the chariot races next week, right?

Sincerely,

Masuro of the Egyptians.

Refining next turn, by the way. ^^
The Arabs have destroyers scouting the seas.

[Paddy]

sounds very sad

so what do you want from my people

we have attained peace this turn

and will now work hard at building libraries and universities

1020ad

[marcuspeddle]

I have told my people of the peace between you and the Byzantines. They are glad to hear the news and are waiting to see if you will build those libraries and universities.
The streets are calm again.

[Paddy]

well your once peaceful people are tooo kind

do they realise the casualities that my people have suffered throughout the years in keeping the japanese and byzantines out of your lands???

[marcuspeddle]

My people argue that they have never had a reason to come into our lands.
Their words, not mine. I am quite content to help you out as much as I can.


(By the way, I'm just roleplaying this a bit to add some interest to my warless game)

[Paddy]

ahh your people need to get out an visit the lands down this way

to see the issues and many border raids into our lands

1150ad

[marcuspeddle]

Oh dear, the dams have burst, the camel's back is broken, the icing is on the cake - no, not that one. Anyway, all hell has broken loose in Egypt!

A group of people calling themselves the Coalition for No Free Lunch have kidnapped the messengers who were bringing you the secrets of Steel manufacturing. The coalition threatens to bring chaos to the kingdom unless the Celts exchange tech for tech or pay us in luxuries.
A sad, sad development. I will let you know if I can get these people under control

[Paddy]

so you talk my people injto peace

you get us to change our massive war machine into a nation of libraries

then you all but declare war on us

sad

very very sad

[marcuspeddle]

All we are saying is give peace a chance.

My nation is a democracy. The people say they want fair tech deals so I have no choice but to listen to the people. Even if some of them turn to radical behaviour.

[Paddy]

well I have sent communisium and facism

give your people some choice then old salt

[marcuspeddle]

Ah, so you were holding out on us, eh? Hmmm . . . . . We'll consider that a payment for steel.

Communism and Facism aren't much of a choice, are they?

[marcuspeddle]

sent