S.P.I.N. #3 Two more than the First.

[History Guy]

POPE'S PERSONAL SURGEON EXAMINES CRAZYGHENGIS AND DELIVERS HIS MEDICAL JUDGEMENT ON THE SAID SAD DEMENTED WARMONGER

He's mad. Mad, I say.

[GhengisFarb™]

NEW NEWSTHREAD RUMORED TO BE IN THE WORKS

Unsubstantiated rumors hint that a new newsthread entitled "Inquisition, Counter Inquisition" may be in the works. It would supposedly involve right wing and left wing extremists GhengisFarb and History Guy using a post - counter post format.

No comment on whether GhengisFarb (of the Ghengis Report) would use his TruthOmeter or History Guy would bring his Squid O' Many Questions..........

[Panzer32]

- Panzer32 Will Not Reveal His Source - Crystal Clear Remains an Enigma -

In respecting the integrity of the press, and despite pressure to do so, Panzer32 will not reveal the source from which he received the Crystal Clear article.

"I will not do it!" said Panzer "so quit twisting my arm. But I will confirm one thing - I did not write the article. It came from Crystal, and I was merely asked to post it in SPIN".

Readers may have been wondering where Crystal has been, having remembered her in a former life when she blew the whistle on the trout-slapping epidemic then sweeping a nation. She has been busy exploring this new world, trying to dig up dirt which will be of interest to the public, and of course, the SPIN readership.

[UnOrthOdOx]

Theseus suspected to have now donned a disguise.

http://www.dailytelegraph.news.com.au/common/story_page/0,5936,6918773^401,00.html

(in honor of avatars leaving again)

[Theseus]

Big and black with a lot of hair... that's me.

Who knows what bananas lurk in the hearts of men... Theseus knows.

(obscure reference... who knows it?)

[Panzer32]

Theseus Breaks SPIN Rules; assumed to be Publicity Stunt

obscure reference = the Shadow?

[Tiberius]

LEGO modernizes its infrastructure

What SPIN reporters have already suspected for quite some time, turned out to be true: Lego has entered the modern age a long time ago!

The evidence came in a form of an announcement, made by technology world leader, IBM. "As part of a multiyear agreement, Lego will aquire a broad collection of IBM servers and storage systems" the company representative announced.

IBM's Lego contract involves a mix of Unix and Intel servers. Lego has bought two top-end p690 "Regatta" Unix servers, four midrange p650 Unix servers, 24 high-end x440 Intel servers, four Enterprise Storage Server "Shark" storage systems and Tivoli storage management software, IBM said.

"We are operating in a very competitive environment and need to respond to the dynamics of our world at a moment's notice," said ZargonX, Lego's President. "IBM was able to provide an on-demand solution that matched our needs for a cohesive, worldwide infrastructure, while also adapting itself to our very cyclical business and need for rapid introduction of new products."

IBM declined to say how much the deal is worth, but Sageza Group analyst Charles King estimated that the figure is in the millions of dollars.

What will Lego do with its newly aquired servers is yet a mistery and a highly kept secret. A recent leak from the Offices of Lego's Military Architect, considered to be only a fake story, now seems to make sense. Apparently Lego is developing in secret a powerful weapon, something they call "The Plastic Bomb"!! What this is we don't know yet, but our faithful readers will be first to find out, that we promise.

http://news.com.com/2100-1010-5062329.html?part=dtx&tag=nhl

[History Guy]

SHADOW SUES THESEUS FOR STEALING TAG LINE

WEDNESDAY, S.P.I.N.U.B. - In another infamous breach of etiquette, Theseus of Egypt posted a comment in the midst of a spin thread. Gasps and surpressed yells of horror were heard throughout the S.P.I.N. Underground Bunker when the news was announced.

Apparently, he is quoted as saying: "Who knows what bananas lurk in the hearts of men? ... Theseus knows."

This provoked an immediate response from the Shadow. After bumping off a wicked Manhattan gang lord, the Shadow informed Theseus that he would shortly be hearing from his lawyer, the amazing fearsome J. N. Dagget.

"It was my line," said the Shadow in a peace conference yesterday. "I always say that...except for the banana part. Insert 'evil', remove banana... Actually, remove the banana first..." The Shadow then adjusted his glasses.

Theseus has not yet commented on the recent allegations by S.P.I.N. officials and by the Shadow.

Mr. Weasel, his lawyer, says: "Well, of course this is unexpected. Mr. Theseus and Mr. Shadow have never been on bad terms. I think that the Shadow is just overworked. You know, he's broken enough nuckles recently in his war on a wicked Manhattan gang lord. It gets to a man.

"...We are not afraid of Mr. Shadow. If he thinks that he is intimidating us with his weird little voice and his cape and his malignant stare and his pointed accusations that he knows how much evil lurks in the heart of Mr. Theseus...well, he's quite mistaken."

Mr. Weasel has high hopes. His plane tickets, he informs us, are perfectly valid, and an overnight relocation to a different country for himself and his family are quite possible as soon as he has sucked Mr. Theseus dry of his wealth and left him for the Shadow.

Pope Calixtus I, who appointed Theseus as a Paladin of the Church, was approached by reporters on whether or not he would speak privately to the Shadow.

He refused to comment further than: "You might think that, but I couldn't possibly comment."

[GhengisFarb™]

SPANISH CITIES SURRENDER IN DROVES!

Fed up with their pathetic nation, and their feathered allies, half the COMBINED empires of Roleplay and Gathering Storm on Bob surrendered to the liberation forces of NeuDemogyptica and Glory of War last turn.

"It was the Wine, most wonderful liquid I have ever tasted!' claimed Jose the Unsteady.
"Oh, no, " chimed Maria the Bearded, a young Spanish maiden. "It is the handsome Warmonger Warriors!
(It should be noted that at this comment the entire liberation force in the vicinity mounted their horses and rode hard to assist in the liberation of Salamanca....)

"Personally, I'm just sick of all the squid," confided a man by the name of Spamish Mitchell.
"Then again we definitely need protection from the horrible 'Jabberwocky' monster that destroyed the 27 outlying villages last night."

Sir UnOrthOdOx seemed somewhat nervous at this last comment. He was overheard to say, "Make darn sure those new chains on CrazyGhengis are gnaw proof this time. I don't want to have to chase him down again like we did this morning.................."

[vondrack]

I was recently approached by an associate of SPIN press, who is also an acquaintance of reporter Crystal Clear. He asked that I post in SPIN her most recent interview, which I now do.

The Coffee Shop Interview

By Crystal Clear, SPIN Press
Arashi, Stormia, 170AD

I am here in Arashi, at the front door of the “Great Feathers” coffee shop on Charioteer’s Avenue. I cannot believe my good fortune. I have been granted an interview with a number of the high-ranking leaders of Gathering Storm. They were in Arashi for a strategy meeting and I was able to grab 30 minutes of their time this morning for the interview. The coffee shop is bustling, and I am working my way through the crowd, ah there they are – over in the corner. I see Shiber, and Theseus, and Nbarclay, and oh my goodness, notyoueither is there as well. My lucky day! Wish me well.

Crystal: Greetings gentlemen! I am Crystal Clear from SPIN press.

Shiber: Welcome, Miss Clear.

Crystal: Please, please, don’t rise on my account. And waiter, yes, an ice latte would be nice. Once again, thank you for taking the time to meet with me today. Perhaps I will start with a question about our surroundings. Is Arashi always this busy?

Shiber: Yes. Isn’t it great? Makes you feel wonderful to be a Stormian.

Theseus: Indeed! Cheers! I’ll drink to that!

Nbarclay: To be more precise, the city is not ‘busy’ per se. It is operating at optimal efficiency given the assigned population density, production and wealth output, and improvements made to the infrastructure.

Crystal: Ah, I see. Well, lets move onto something more interesting, This “strategic planning” thing you are doing. What is it all about?

Shiber: We are looking out beyond current events and where we want our great nation to be in, say, 1000 years.

Theseus: Great stuff, by jove. I’ll drink to that!

Nbarclay: We are actually weighing the costs and benefits of various down-stream options, with a view to maximizing growth both geographically and financially. The options are laid out as a series of branching scenarios with key decision points high-lighted.

Crystal: Ah, I see. Does it have anything to do with current events on the Bobian continent.

Nye: No.

Crystal: Well, moving right along. Maybe we should revisit some of Gathering Storm’s glorious past - the war with Vox. Any reflections?

Shiber: Yes, glorious times they were. True hearts, honor and strategy beat treachery and deceit anytime.

Theseus: To say nothing of our stout-heartedness and damned good fighting skills. It was a good fight, yes. One can always use a good fight.

Nbarclay: And my analysis of the cost of the early Golden Age triggered by the Voxian invasion will be tabled with the senate next week.

Crystal: And you, nye?

Nye: We won.

Crystal: Um, yes, of course. So, allowing Vox to exodus in the controlled and peaceful manner you did, well, I guess my question is ‘why?’ They stabbed you in the back and then whipped up fervor and world opinion against you.

Shiber: True enough. It was a tough decision. Some wanted to axe them, others show mercy. It was quite a debate. But Stormian honor and generosity carried the day. I believe the Voxians have learned their lesson.

Theseus: And they were pretty much beaten by the later stages. It wouldn’t have been much of a fight in the end. Hardly worth it, really. The time was better spent celebrating.

Nbarclay: Furthermore, there were two benefits to their survival, First, we got their cities and terrain improvements intact. But secondly, Vox’s continued existence maintains the geo-political balance described in the Nbarclay-velocyrix theory of ‘the steady state of world politics’. You should read it someday.

Crystal: Mmm, yes. I will pick it up this afternoon. But speaking of velocyrix, is that not him across the room there?

Shiber: That is him, in the flesh. The “wayward son of Stormia”.

Crystal: But what is he doing? He pays no attention to anyone; he is just writing.

Shiber: Ah, that. Well yes. You see, he works on his missives. He returned from a long period in the mountains, at a place called CandleBre...

Theseus: …but don’t mention that too loudly. You see, CandleBre doesn’t really exist. Well, it does. But only in Vel’s mind. If you see my point?

Crystal: Indeed I do. His missives?

Shiber: Yes, these long public statements; he sends them out to the world at large.

Crystal: Ah yes. I recall reading a couple of them recently. Are they sanctioned GS communications?

Shiber: Well, I would say…

Nye: No comment.

Shiber: Yes, that is exactly what I would say - no comment.

Crystal: OK then. Why did he return? Does it relate to the recent departure of members of the Stormian senate.

Nye: No comment.

Crystal: OK, well do you agree with his positions? Personally I mean.

Shiber: Well, Vel is always right. From my perspective…

Nye: That would be...

Crystal: Yes, I know.. ‘no comment’. Well, this is fun, maybe we should change topics. We have 10 minutes left. Let’s talk ‘Bob’.

Theseus: Ah good, the war. Now that is something I wish I could talk about. Now if only those loud-mouthed wimps who call themselves warmongers would come and get some, we REALLY would have something to talk about. As it is, our boys drill and train and train some more. They long for the good old days of kicking Voxian butt. By Grog, now that was a good war. Yes, there was talking, but at least we fought.

Shiber: Patience, Theseus. It may still come to a good fight on Bob. After all, diplomacy does not seem to be winning the day.

(all laugh, except for nye)

Crystal: Yes, there certainly seems to be considerably disagreement, and I should add, acrimony with Glory of War, over the ceding of the Spanish cities to GS. Any thoughts on the matter?

Nbarclay: They are wrong.

Shiber: And they are low-life and liars, to boot.

Theseus: I just wish they would attack.

Nye: We know the truth and we stand by it.

Crystal: And is there any truth to the rumor that you will be giving the old Voxian lands to the Spanish. I have to admit, this new-found alliance of yours does seem more like a matter of, shall I say… opportunity and convenience, as opposed to a long-standing friendship.

Nbarclay: The alliance is logical. Surely the other AI’s, er .. I mean, nations realize that.

Shiber: Spain deserves to live free!

Theseus: I tend to stay out of politics myself, but if it leads to a good fight, then I am all for it.

Crystal: And Spain in the Vox lands?

Nye: No comment.

Crystal (glaring at nye): Come on nye, be reasonable. The rumors are out there. The world wants to know!

Nye: (glares back … but with a slight twinkle in his eyes …) And they will; in due time.

Nbarclay: Speaking of time, times up. We need to return to our meeting.

Crystal: Right. Well, thank you gentlemen. This has been a most, ah, illuminating discussion. And the latte was delicious. I must come back.

Nye: Please do.

I rise to leave, and find notyoueither has reached out to help me up. I leave the now somewhat less crowded café. My steps seem somewhat lighter. Is it the conclusion of a successful but somewhat stressful interview? Or was there really a twinkle there?

I glance back. Nye’s eyes meet mine. Yes! There it is! And then I am lost in the bustling crowds of the street.

[Theseus]

WARCHICKEN TRAINER VOWS RAZING OF FRYERS

Dateline: 290 AD, Arashi

Famed War Chicken handler and Director of Training at the Stormian Avian Academy, Engelbert Humperstorm, has released the following statement:

"Following reports that the dastardly leadership of GoW, especially that meanie Aggie, have developed plans for vast chicken frying facilities, we have developed a new training regimen for the 1st, 2nd, and 3rd War Chicken Brigades.

Henceforth, all War Chickens in these Brigades will receive special training during their second and third weeks at the Academy, in the destruction of any building that looks remotely like a fried chicken venue.

As is well known, War Chickens have a voracious appetite for bananas. We have build mock fried chicken venues at a secret location, and have FILLED them with bananas, which will be the only source of food during the entire second week of training.

Additionally, I have written a song that I call 'Dance the Night Away'. For the entire third week of training, the War Chickens will be penned in the mock fried chicken venues and forced to listen to this song 24 hours a day.

Thus, all War Chickens at the GoW front, upon seeing an evil fried chicken venue, shall immediately be released to hunt for bananas INSIDE the facility, and, once inside, will be be enraged by both the absence of bananas and the Stormian Drum and Fife Corps' playing of 'Dance the Night Away'.

We expect each War Chicken to be capable of razing at least 2 fried chicken venues per day.

Additionally, the Assistant Director of Training at the Avian Academy, Tom Jones-Rain, has developed a special training regimen for the 4th War Chicken Brigade (Special Operations Capable), in hunting down the evil leaders of GoW, including those responsible for the reprehensible fried chicken program. Life-size dummies of GoW leadership (a redundant concept) have been stuffed with bananas, especially in the general crotch region. During the second and third weeks of training, the bananas in the dummies will be the only available food for the birds. Mr. Jones-Rain has also written a special song, 'It's Not Unusual', which will be played for fourteen straight days as part of this Brigade's training, and through a cunning secret invention appears to be emanating from the GoW dummies.

The Avian Academy deeply deplores GoW's heartless attacks and machinations regarding our magnificent War Chickens, and will do everything in our power to bring them to their much-deserved pecking, clawing, and fiery ruin."

[Beta]

Vox Market Update

Now the latest business news from the market in New Voice.

The VSX was up 4.5% today on news that Immortal Industries will turn a tidy quarterly profit, and that their latest militarty inventions are set for production. II was up .25 gold in today's trading.

The forestry sector was also up significantly, with analysts citing the recent licensing of tiles in southern Voxtavia for cutting.

On the futures market, pork bellies were down 3/8's, but chicken futures were up an eye-popping 89% on news of dramatically increased demand from war-ravaged Bob.

Now for the weather ....

[Theseus]

Theseus goes insane; takes over the Strategy Forum

News at eleven.

[Beta]

Theseus' Reporting Credentials Revoked

The World Press, in conjunction with SPIN, and the SBC, Stormian Broadcast Corporation, have revoked the reporting credentials of Theseus, a reporter familiar to readers of this paper.

At issue is Theseus' latest headline, proclaiming: "Theseus Goes Insane". Article 15.1/2 of the World Press Code of Ethics clearly states that a reporter must report on news, being defined in Article 1.6 as "new information".

The fact that Theseus has gone insane is definitely not "new" information by any stretch of the imagination. The majority of the reporting corps, as well as our informed readers are already aware of this fact.

Therefore, Theseus is deemed to be in violation of the World Press Code of Ethics. His reporting rights are hereby revoked for a period of 48 hours. A public apology/explanation would also be appropriate, and could help rebuild the tarnished image of this experienced reporter.

[GhengisFarb™]

Theseus' Reporting Credentials Revoked -editorial addition.

It should also be noted his "new(s) at eleven" never showed up at 11.