The Banana is Evil!!!!

[MJW]

What's the point of this?

[Epistax]

MJW you're just jealous you didn't do this thread first

[Captain]

it's spam, but it's funny spam. at least it's entertaining!

[rendelnep]

can we have more posts from other religious zealots threatening to skin me alive or saying 'Rendel I am a believer, lets go and burn skywalker plantation' and less of this 'Huh whats going on???'

[Aro]

Originally posted by Captain
it's spam, but it's funny spam. at least it's entertaining!

Agreed. We have more spam than every other civ site. Despite this (maybe just because), the people flock to us… 260 citizens until now.
Oh, and finally I can use this:

[Aro]

Originally posted by Shiber
I deny my former statements. The true, all-powerful god is the god of improper grammar. He truly reigns supreme.
You cannot possibly resist him! You isn't able to! <== See? He controls my grammar too and he can mend it to his every will!!

Mr. Shiber,
As you can see in my posts, I'm a believer.

Mr. Rendenelp,
Are you a martyr? If so, I must advise you, people here are sadistic and nasty, and they can send your soul to Banana’s Heaven, or even the Mango’s Heaven in many painful ways. Burned, decapitated, crucified, impaled, in little pieces… Not to mention “death by banana”, don’t ask, as said by Mr. GhengisFarb.
By other hand, if you are starting a counter-revolution ('Rendel I am a believer, lets go and burn skywalker plantation'), here is another advice: be careful, Mr. Skywalker is a very rich and powerful man, with his own little private army. Nice guys. You will be a martyr in the same way…
Btw, the only true God is gOd. The Great Banana and The God of Improper Grammar are distinct aspects of His divinity. Ask everyone…
May Banana bless you and save your immortal soul

[Captain]

Btw, the only true God is gOd. The Great Banana and The God of Improper Grammar are distinct aspects of His divinity. Ask everyone…

a Trinity!!! but we don't even have monotheism yet!

[Aro]

You’re right! I’m heretic!
Thanks, Captain, to open my eyes. Now I’m beginning to see the light! Err… the lights. Many Gods, many lights…

[rendelnep]

I dont know aro I just want a cult of my own is that too much to ask?

[CapitanGarlic]

a cult?

where do I sign?

[rendelnep]

hurray right here sir

[Aro]

No, is not too much. We are polytheists! For 40 turns, at least you will be safe. After this… well, it’s your soul. Actually, the problem will be your body. It’s not immortal, you know...
Btw, I like mangoes... But please, don't tell anybody, I'll deny!

[Shiber]

Is this one of those cults where they tell you that if you mail them a check they will tell you the true meaning of life and you mail a huge check but their letter never comes, and you wonder "Oh it must have been lost in the mail 'cause that drunken homeless guy in the bar who tipped me off about this cult looked very reliable"?
Or is it the one where they tell you that if you call them in the next 15 minutes they'll throw in a bonus automatic banana pealer absolutely free? Oh wait, that's the home shopping channel... it's kind of a cult though, come to think about it.

[rendelnep]

Firstly Aro don't worry I understand and shieber not really it's more of the type of cult which aims to contend with the major religion and eventually kill it off or take half of its supporters.
I would now like to further explain the basis for the religion basically the religion state All of the gods (except the banana) resides in a fruit bowl. the reason why the banana is evil is because of their tendency to rot the other fruit.

edit I will repeat the following the banana is not in fact evil merely a innuendo and therefore a pervert

[themagicbanana]

Re: The Banana is (not) evil!!!!

Originally posted by rendelnep
I , rendelnep here proclaim that the Banana that so many of you worship is in fact (not) evil. Look what he has done to our people. The government hass been split into two and I am certain that it is (not) the fault of the Banana god.

I here by proclaim a set of new gods:
The orange - the god who ccontrol the movements of the sun,
The Mango- god of sorbets and fertility as well as being president of the gods ,
The strawberry god- protector of the common folk,
The Kiwi fruit- the god who protects those who wish to explore foreign lands,
the beetroot- god of foreign gods who upsurp the local ones
Apple -god of grammarical wrongness and limited vocabularies
The Cucumber the god of water
Banana- god of civilised life and innuendos
and
Finally Coconut the god nut of war !!!!!!

edit: added two new gods to show that this religion is willing to admit that was thought up by some luney unlike the religion of some other god who's current name eludes me at this time

edit: renouced the banana's evilness

The Banana shall punish you and your followers for your ways.Except no bananas to grow this year....and more bad things will happen.we let you win the war with america, but just be wary of future wars you idiot.

banana