The Recycling Tanks

[Zero]

Keep them coming! I it.

[Static Universe]

Back in 1970 a low-level Soviet factory manager had acquired enough money to get a Trabant. Excitedly, he walked to the showroom and arranged to purchase the state of the art in Soviet personal transportation.

The manager of the dealership greeted him. "Greetings, comrade. How may I helpd you?"

The customer proudly stated, "I have come to purchase the Trabant."

"Certainly, comrade," said the salesman "You can have the next one that comes-in from the factory. It will be black."

The customer is pleased. "That will be excellent, comrade."

"I must warn you that we do not expect the car to be here for some time," The salesman said.

The customer expected this and asked "When will the car arrive?"

"Why don't you come back this same day in 1980 and we'll see." The salesman was a little worried now.

The customer thought for a minute and said "Will that be in the morning or the afternoon?"

The salesman was puzzled. "Why do you want to know that, comrade?"

The customer replied, "Well, I've got a doctor's appointment..."

[Micha]

Good one!
(although I have to add: Trabant was the Eastern German car, Soviets didn´t use them. They had Volga and Moskvitch )

[Jamski]

Go Trabi !

-Jam

[Frankychan]

I'll have to think of something.

[Static Universe]

Kruschev was busy denouncing Stalin at a public meeting when a voice shouted out, "If you feel this way now, why didn't you say so then?''

To which the Soviet leader thundered, "Who said that?''

There was a long and petrified silence which Kruschev finally broke. "Now you know why.''

[Jamski]

Classic

-Jam

[Frankychan]

awesome....and true AFAIK! :bL

[Vev]

A Major, an Air Marshall and a Comissar were standing at the command tent when the Major said, "My soldiers are brave and will advance against constant gun fire and shelling to capture crucial fortification at any costs." The Air Marshall said, "That is nothing. My pilots will fly in the thick of machinegun and flak fire to bomb enemy artillery batteries and airfields in broad daylight.

The Comissar was silent throughout the discussion but he called a Corporal to come in. The corporal was terrified and sweating badly. The Comissar said, "Corporal, I want to you go alone behind enemy lines, past the ruins full of snipers and take out the enemy command post." The corporal was now even more scared and starting to shake as he said, "I refuse to, Comissar". The Comissar sneered, "Now that is bravery."

[Nubclear]

*Lenin walks into the room*

TEST!!!!

*Lenin walks out*

[Frankychan]

Is Comrade Tassadar going into every room and shouting 'test'?

[Vev]

A University scientist and a Hive trainer where in a field with their dogs. The university said, "Our dogs are very intelligent we use genetically engineered dogs and trained them with our special technique to obey complex commands and perform intelligent tasks."
"Fido, use the nanomachines to make an impact rifle and a silksteel personal armour."

Fido walks up to the seal crate of nanomachines, uses the laser mounted on Fido's vest and cut open a hole in the crate to extract the nanomachine canisters. Fido then pressed a button on his chest and barked twice. The nanomachines became active and created an impact rifle and a silksteel armour.

The Hive trainer says, "Impressive, but our dogs are smarter." He whispered to his dog and the dog walked up to Fido and they stared eached for a long while before Fido walked back with the Hive dog and sat next to the Hiver trainer.

The University scientist tried to call Fido back but the dog refused to obey. The scientist said, "What did you do to my dog?". The Hive trainer said, "I told my dog, if you do not persuade Fido to change allegiance, you'll be dinner next."

[Jamski]

I thought we ate all the dogs already Whatever, that hamster mince was really good last night.....

....what do you mean we didn't bring any hamsters from the Unity??

-Jam

[Static Universe]

Originally posted by Jamski
I thought we ate all the dogs already Whatever, that hamster mince was really good last night.....

....what do you mean we didn't bring any hamsters from the Unity??

-Jam

No, those were lab rats we swiped from the University.

[Jamski]

/me feels rather queasy

-Jam