Two Houses : Comments

[Alynzia]

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[senatus]

Fantastic! Your writing style has noticably improved; I am jealous . Seriously though, you've portrayed a very dark, very chilling, and very realistic portrayal of Morganic society. Reminds me of Pohl and Kornbluth's classic work (The Space Merchants), except darker.

"... scuttling around like the vermin that they were" was both funny and illustrative of the position the "have-nots" would own and be thought of in such a society....

[Kassiopeia]

MORE! It ends too wuickly, like there is more to come?
The style is quite strange to me, but that's not a bad thing. It's very, say, prosaic, compared to the literature I normally read(and compared to my own handwork).

[Alynzia]

?

[problem_child]

I- am profoundly enthusiastic regarding Two Houses at this point. I mean really!

You've definately improved, and I am really enjoying the results, the plot so far beams confidence in its complexity so I'm sure we're in for a good game of Scheming-Bourgeo-Brutality!

I too have always seen the Hive citizens as bald- no, not bald- fuzzy. Fuzzy domed, like The Man I spoze.

type MORE.

[Clear Skies]

I always tend to see all members of a faction as fundamentally identical to their leaders - I have trouble writing in male Cyborgs and Gaians or female Peacekeepers, for example.

[problem_child]

I'd say diversity is always very interesting in a SMACX story, giving the reader insight into the elements of Planetary society that do not get represented in the game (but are implied by it i spoze, when you think about it).

Power struggles between power circles within Factions for example, fasion trends, products, powerful personalities other then the faction leaders, quirks, nuances, cultural detail; all these things really highten the sense of depth breadth and richness within the Chiron world.

As for how followers are visualised, i tend to think of em like this;
I try an imagine sitting in a cafe in the Faction in question, look out the window, what do i see.

Believers dress clean cut and boring, like Witnesses maybe, or Pilgrims (cept i also like to incorporate Islamic-ness in em)
Hivers I think of as like the folks in Dune the movie, and bald. Yangs pic does look similar to the outfts in Dune, effeicient practical survival gear that allows you to do such things as drink your own sweat and to practice highly disciplined activities in (like blowing things up with your voice for example)
Spartans are easy, as are Corpos, Gaians (trendy to Severe) and the rest. Jo Cyborg i think would just look like a regular guy, but more likely to have an MMI-lattice, and comfortable with the idea of Machine Government.

I try not to get carried away with thinking of everybody from a society is going to be a stereotype of that societies philosophy, actually i mostly have trouble picturing what a Jo Faction looks like; thats why so far i've left the rabble outta my writing.

[problem_child]

oh yeah- and while i'm in the mood for a tap-

Aly- don't change the style! if its dark- its dark, thats just part of the style man!

[death_head]

Well-written, dark literature is amazing. It makes you think so much more than happy-go-lucky pieces. Keep up the good work.