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Rising up to the challenge

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  • Rising up to the challenge

    "You can't do this Deidre!"

    "I can and I must commisioner. Planet is a being that is 1000 time as intelligent, 1000 times as powerfull and 1000 times as good as humans, it's the right thing to do, to let Her make our decisions."

    "But what about democracy? You can't run a faction just by interpreting what a voice says in your head."

    "Of course I can Commisioner, Planet wishes us to be part of Planet, but then we must follow her rules."

    "You have put the death penalty on wastefull behaviour!"

    "Of course, those that wish to rape Her must be shown they can not escape her wrath, the Mind worms will show them Her fury."

    "You're mad Deidre, maybe there is a voice but it's clearly warped in your head. I can understand your troops didn't help the Spartans and even moved out of the way, And I can understand you attacked Morgan, but this fundamentalistic government! And what are you doing with those Morgan cities? I haven't received a message from there in weeks."

    "That city and it's populace were ravaging Her. We gave them their just punishement."

    "No... no don't say that. You had it RAZED?"

    "The mindworms have taken back a part of what they have taken from Her, and they have showed that She does not tolerate parasite as the Morganites."

    "That's it Deidre, Vendetta upon you. I don't like doing this but Miriam was right. I should have looked past her religious anger that you worshipped another god. Than she wouldn't have had to run from this continent. but I will end your mad reign. Lal out"


    So what do you think? Am I any good? Should I continue?
    Fire and ice and death awaiting. But he was steel, he was steel.

  • #2
    Ummm. You need alot more detail. Get more into the chracters and the setting. A simple conversation is no good.

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    • #3
      Thanks Bearcat. It does look kinda dry now you mention it. I'll change it later
      Fire and ice and death awaiting. But he was steel, he was steel.

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