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Hello and welcome to the beauty contest. Please meet our candidates:
Icon number one. Young and studies economy. Likes long walks in nature, classical music and cats. Aspires to become a shoemaker.
Icon number two. Professional pyromaniac. Likes to live fast and dangerous. Travelled to Constantinopole, Istanbul and Byzantium.
Icon number three. Amputator. Inhales small mammals in spare time. Studied armoire climbing for three years.
Icon number four. Phrenologist. Fancies catterpillars and broken train engines. Very gregarious.
Icon number five. Resident of People's Democratic Republic of Canada. Gives lessons in suicide bungee jumping. Favorite food: the larch.
Icon number six. Works in stupidity managment. Has twenty and a half wolverines in her home. Looking for a lifemate.
Icon number seven. Stepdances in minefields. Likes romantic movies and recycleable dinners. Want to become an ox.
Icon number eight. Supports the right to bang your head against wall. Dislikes huge muscular mountains. Met the Wandering Jew.
Icon number nine. Student of window washing. Travelled all around something spherical. Wants to become a landfill before she reaches the age of thirty.
Icon number ten. In search for the love of her life for unpaid alimentation. Promotes Mad cow disease. Practices bowel bashing.
Icon number eleven. Supermodel from Krypton. Likes to mow the grass in front of her Supermarket of Solitude. Dislikes Kryptonite.
Icon number twelve. Enjoys wild nightlife. Professional movie star stalker. Has killed Jimmy Hoffa and J.F.K.
Icon number thirteen. Former singer, currently elephant washer. Likes sunsets and walruses. Dislikes Libertarians.
Icon number fourteen. Formerly known as a mountain goat, this contestant is now one of the top rated Fundamentalistan models. Want to commit a tragic suicide.
Icon number fifteen. The Crocodile Hunter previously known as Steve Irwin is now trying modeling career. Thinks that baboons are "good mates". Dislikes can openers.
Icon number sixteen. Despite leprosy, this brave contestant is always ready to smile. Works as greeter at the airports. Recently been accussed she can't keep her hands to herself.
Icon number seventeen. Our final contestant comes from Finland. Plans world domination. Generally evil.
Icon number one. Young and studies economy. Likes long walks in nature, classical music and cats. Aspires to become a shoemaker.
Icon number two. Professional pyromaniac. Likes to live fast and dangerous. Travelled to Constantinopole, Istanbul and Byzantium.
Icon number three. Amputator. Inhales small mammals in spare time. Studied armoire climbing for three years.
Icon number four. Phrenologist. Fancies catterpillars and broken train engines. Very gregarious.
Icon number five. Resident of People's Democratic Republic of Canada. Gives lessons in suicide bungee jumping. Favorite food: the larch.
Icon number six. Works in stupidity managment. Has twenty and a half wolverines in her home. Looking for a lifemate.
Icon number seven. Stepdances in minefields. Likes romantic movies and recycleable dinners. Want to become an ox.
Icon number eight. Supports the right to bang your head against wall. Dislikes huge muscular mountains. Met the Wandering Jew.
Icon number nine. Student of window washing. Travelled all around something spherical. Wants to become a landfill before she reaches the age of thirty.
Icon number ten. In search for the love of her life for unpaid alimentation. Promotes Mad cow disease. Practices bowel bashing.
Icon number eleven. Supermodel from Krypton. Likes to mow the grass in front of her Supermarket of Solitude. Dislikes Kryptonite.
Icon number twelve. Enjoys wild nightlife. Professional movie star stalker. Has killed Jimmy Hoffa and J.F.K.
Icon number thirteen. Former singer, currently elephant washer. Likes sunsets and walruses. Dislikes Libertarians.
Icon number fourteen. Formerly known as a mountain goat, this contestant is now one of the top rated Fundamentalistan models. Want to commit a tragic suicide.
Icon number fifteen. The Crocodile Hunter previously known as Steve Irwin is now trying modeling career. Thinks that baboons are "good mates". Dislikes can openers.
Icon number sixteen. Despite leprosy, this brave contestant is always ready to smile. Works as greeter at the airports. Recently been accussed she can't keep her hands to herself.
Icon number seventeen. Our final contestant comes from Finland. Plans world domination. Generally evil.
I'll wait until we approach 19 votes.
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