The Asswhip Thread

[JohnT]

So, what's whipping your azz today?

Here is mine for 8.28.2018:

Why does my car... with more processing power than all of Earth's computers in existence in 1968... why does it still have a "check engine" light? Can't it just, you know, TELL ME what is wrong? Why do I have to take it into the shop so some yag can hook it up to ANOTHER COMPUTER to tell me that the alternator is going, or it's throwing a piston, or whatever?

I mean, the damn thing has a full-color screen the size of an old-style Macintosh monitor and has no problem telling me what song is playing on the radio, who the band is, and what year the song was released. It can scroll through my phones contact list and make phone calls. It can play videos. It can calculate my gas efficiency depending upon how hard I am pressing the gas pedal. It monitors my tire pressure for each tire. It tells me how long my oil is good for.

But for some reason I am forced to go to some dimbulbs auto shop because, while it can tell HIM what is wrong with the engine, that information apparently can't be told to me, the guy who owns it.

....

Anyway, so what's whipping your azz today?

[BeBMan]

I routinely get annoyed by that kind of plastic packaging that comes with a little extra piece saying "open here", but - often - when you actually try that, all you get off is the little plastic piece, while the rest of the package is still closed

[Lorizael]

Pretty sure it's that way because car manufacturers (and their associated dealerships) want it that way. You can acquire/buy a little gizmo that plugs into a port on your car and spits out the specific code generating your check engine light. (And you can google the codes.)

[rah]

Which is what the guy at the auto shop does. And sometimes the codes don't even point to a single issue and makes you guess.

And I read the title to this thread as wiping your ass.

[JohnT]

I routinely get annoyed by that kind of plastic packaging that comes with a little extra piece saying "open here", but - often - when you actually try that, all you get off is the little plastic piece, while the rest of the package is still closed

er... wrong quote... let's try this again...

Pretty sure it's that way because car manufacturers (and their associated dealerships) want it that way. You can acquire/buy a little gizmo that plugs into a port on your car and spits out the specific code generating your check engine light. (And you can google the codes.)

Well, yeah, I get that it's a ****ing scam to get me in the ****ing dealership, but it still whips my ass.

[rah]

I think you quoted the wrong post.

[JohnT]

Ass... WHIPPED!

[Giancarlo]

I thought this thread for kidiot lol.

As far as the car, don't get me started. My previous 1999 Corolla really pissed me off. Now I never buy used. I have a 2015 Versa now and am shopping around for something slightly upgraded.

[Bereta_Eder]

I frecked the right wing. I mean I seriousyly frecked it. Now I have to live up to expectations. I think I can do that. Car runs just fine https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DWbMy2J2IDs

[Bereta_Eder]

OTOH I'm positive I can do it https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hGRqnNEOpe0

[Broken_Erika]

Aaawww shucks! I thought this was going to be some sort of BDSM thread.
False Advertising!

[rah]

From urban dictionary

bsdm
A word that is used by idiots when trying to search for BDSM.

[Broken_Erika]

Close enough.

[JohnT]

Can I just say there is a special place in Hell for people who make radio ads which feature traffic sounds like sirens and honking horns?