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  • The Last Jedi *Spoilers*

    Now that there's plenty of spoilers everywhere on the internets ...

    I expect major fanboy hate on this one. For background I loved Rogue, would put it in the top 3 with 4 and 5. 6 was ok. 7 was fun, if cheesey and predictable. I enjoyed 1-3 for what they were, high quality CGI spacey wars.
    As a Star Wars fan I was very disappointed. The more I think about it, the more it becomes my least favorite SW movie. I was entertained by the space fighty 'splosions and stuff. A couple good moments in the movie, but mostly they were followed up by disappointment. It was an ok film on it's own, if I pretty much left my SW baggage at the door.

    If I list the things I really take away from the film though, the bad stuff is far more memorable than the good.

    The film seemed almost laughably intent on just discarding everything really interesting about The Force Awakens. Like Trump was directing it and Obama had directed TFA. Or like the director really wanted to flip off all the fans who were speculating over the past 2 years. Like, "oh, you think this is interesting, well SORRY ... it's not interesting! Haha ... fooled you with all the dramatic lead ups!" Who's Snoke? Who cares... (amazing while making him simultaneously way overpowered) Rey's lineage? Nothing to see here... (could still be salvaged). What happens after Rey hands the lightsaber to Luke? Literally discarded. I was mildly surprised Rey survived the film.

    Humor. Way over the top, especially making a joke out of the general or whoever he was. It kinda undermined Poe, since he's facing off against a moron. Luke tossing the lightsaber and dusting off his shoulder were both funny moments in a B-rate movie sorta way. Keep the humor to the droids/fuzzies and some witty quips please. Comic relief in dramatic, episode (maybe trilogy) defining moments? No, please, no. The PETA penguin thing was funny, in the Disney sorta way.

    The heavy handed social messages. I'm a tree hugging vegetarian aspiring to vegan trying to create better paying jobs while improving the environment in a poor country ... and even to me it was all just forced in a blunt, inelegant, often distracting AND irrelevant way. When they showed the ice fox things going into the fort I was distracted by the thought of how they were going to be a key to some plot. The whole casino side plot seemed created solely for messaging. The only redeeming value here is the anticipation of the joy of watching some conservative's heads asplode over it all. Would much prefer a more subtle jab even in that regard though. Because I almost have to agree with them on this.

    Too many characters. Most of whom either didn't get any character building (the first bombardier sister, who was probably the best part of the movie), or who's side plots just didn't matter much (the second sister and Finn who get 3 missions and all 3 of them are inconsequential to the main story).

    The purple hair lady commander's plan was surprising, I'll give them that. I wasn't expecting the whole Casino and infiltration thing to be a complete dead end. (In more ways than one.) Definitely didn't see that coming. But why did she wait until half the shuttles were blown up to act? Also, the only reason there was a surprise there was ... OH WAIT, WE HAVE CLOAKING DEVICES SO WE CAN GET OUT OF THIS! Bet you didn't see that coming because it was never mentioned! Fooled you! And also fooled Poe, which ruined the whole plan. Was this a self-derisive metaphor for how trying to fool the audience killed the movie?

    Too many remakes. There's all the scenes/roles lifted from 5 and 6, and quite a few allusions to 1-3. They did it out of order to keep it less obvious, but it was still obvious.

    SLOWEST. SPACE. CHASE. EVER.
    Last edited by Aeson; December 16, 2017, 06:12.

  • #2
    I enjoyed it. Nice to see our Darth in training actually acting. After the last one I was uncertain if he could.

    Yeah, there were some issues. But it's just a movie; which I got to share with my daughter. A good time was had by all.

    There was a boy scout reward program where winners got to watch. All 16 theaters were running it. Fortunately their winning wasn't good for IMAX.
    It's almost as if all his overconfident, absolutist assertions were spoonfed to him by a trusted website or subreddit. Sheeple
    RIP Tony Bogey & Baron O

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    • #3
      Disappointing. So many plot holes and questions.
      Try http://wordforge.net/index.php for discussion and debate.

      Comment


      • #4
        Hasn't everyone of them had those? Come on, these were never meant to be anything more than B material space opera for the entertainment of the masses. Holding them up to masterpiece standards just seems funny. Not a single one has qualified for that status and none ever will.
        It's almost as if all his overconfident, absolutist assertions were spoonfed to him by a trusted website or subreddit. Sheeple
        RIP Tony Bogey & Baron O

        Comment


        • #5
          It was the biggest **** sandwich ever!!!

          A ****ing colossal pile of utter wank!

          I mean, literally ALL of it was utter utter ****e! It's hard to think of any redeeming qualities whatsoever...

          Literally the ONLY thing that didn't make it immediately worse than Phantom Menace was a lack of Jar Jar Binks!

          The craptitude is literally too much to list!

          I feel betrayed and an utter chump. After the excellence of Rogue One and the complete 'Fake News' unanimity of the critics, I'd clearly allowed myself to be blindsided to the possibility of being delivered this utter garbage!

          A little bit of sick just forced its way into my mouth just thinking about it again...

          Sent from my SM-G935F using Tapatalk

          "Aha, you must have supported the Iraq war and wear underpants made out of firearms, just like every other American!" Loinburger

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          • #6
            Originally posted by rah
            Hasn't everyone of them had those? Come on, these were never meant to be anything more than B material space opera for the entertainment of the masses. Holding them up to masterpiece standards just seems funny. Not a single one has qualified for that status and none ever will.
            Absolutely true. But as Aeson laid out, there's plenty of the SW canon he really enjoyed, like me. Ordered IIRC as I would order them too. Several of the Star Wars films I could watch again and again!

            B material space opera goes with the territory and I'm cool with that.

            There just isn't a letter in the alphabet that deserves to be shamed with whatever this utter crap is trying to be...

            It was utter bull**** and no self-respecting fan should be allowed to be abused in this manner.



            Sent from my SM-G935F using Tapatalk

            "Aha, you must have supported the Iraq war and wear underpants made out of firearms, just like every other American!" Loinburger

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            • #7
              I don't know about that. There were really only a couple of choices. Redo The empire strikes back. (and there were a few scenes that made you think they were poking fun at that direction)
              Or do something different that wasn't so unoriginal. (like TFA) So any fan that says they like TFA but not this one, I call BORING.
              Yeah this one wasn't great, but I enjoyed it. SOMEWHAT so because it was different. But just an opinion. I've never really cared about staying strict to the canon. I think it's overdone.
              It's almost as if all his overconfident, absolutist assertions were spoonfed to him by a trusted website or subreddit. Sheeple
              RIP Tony Bogey & Baron O

              Comment


              • #8
                The entire movie was stupid from start to finish!

                It was really that bad I honestly don't know where to begin - it's really hard to think of any redeeming features whatsoever!

                Um, those weird ice/salt foxes looked cool...

                Um... Er... Nope... That's about all I've got.

                I liked Benicio Del Toro's character...

                The ships and effects very cool as always.

                EVERYTHING. ELSE. WAS. UTTER. ****E!!!

                Like...

                Hux was like a pantomime Mr Bean in space - impossible to take him seriously after the stupid joke at the beginning...

                The Dreadnought is a ****ty pointless ship with the worse weak spot in the history of weak spots! 'Bomber' ships that have dumb WWII style bombs that seem to rely on... Gravity... IN SPACE!?

                Leia. Well, for a brief fleeting second I though - 'wow they're going to fix the continuity issue of her being dead in real life by venting her into space - unexpectedly harsh but really cool' - then the ****wit director watched one superhero movie too many and SPACE FLEW HER back into the ship!!! WTF WTF WTF!? She's never trained her ability - whereas characters like Darth Maul and The Emperor specifically FELL to their deaths. Even Luke needs a ****ing pole to get around his island - but Leia can get blown out of a ship and suddenly can fly back into a small hole in a ship travelling through space very very quickly!!!

                What else - stupid slow motion OJ Simpson chase. Why do the fighters have to retreat the moment the star destroyers are out of range? Why only launch what was it? Three? When they have loads later.

                Luke is a Childish nasty-minded imbecile! ****ing Yoda!? ****ing hell!

                Why is Kylo Ren such a thick cretinous ***** - apart from the bit where he dupes Snoke impossibly easily?

                Stupid pointless scene about milking aliens!

                Chewie going off his food because of the cute space puffins was actually funny. Thank **** those were only birds - the trailer made me wonder if that bird in the cockpit was his co-pilot! Phew!

                OJ Simpson style space chase - WTF!?

                One side, the rebels, have 18 hours to fly to a random stupid planet, get jailed, fly back, infiltrate the enemy ship etc etc.

                The other side with Mr Hux Bean keep chasing like numpty cretins...

                There's a bit later on the moon where the rebels express surprise that nobody instantly rushes to their aid when Leia sends out her distress signal.

                18 hours and the plan was wait for the other side to run out of fuel. They could have dialed up a ton of back up to skewer the rebels.

                Snoke, zero back story or character development - two dimensional cardboard cut out bad guy.

                Captain Phasma. Literally pointless!

                Hoth repeat - is there no imagination left? Seriously?

                Don't get me started on the Force!

                The never-before-tried-suicide-lightspeed-ship-attack... Yes, also dumb!

                There is no end to the dumb stupidity of this movie...

                I literally could go on and on. I'm bored.

                Sent from my SM-G935F using Tapatalk




                Last edited by I AM MOBIUS; December 18, 2017, 19:27.
                "Aha, you must have supported the Iraq war and wear underpants made out of firearms, just like every other American!" Loinburger

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                • #9
                  It wasn't entirely stupid but it needed much better writing.
                  Try http://wordforge.net/index.php for discussion and debate.

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                  • #10
                    99% stupid?

                    Sent from my SM-G935F using Tapatalk

                    "Aha, you must have supported the Iraq war and wear underpants made out of firearms, just like every other American!" Loinburger

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      I don't know why anyone is surprised. Think back folks. Every one of them have been kinda of similar in nature. Granted this one takes it to new heights.
                      It's not like 1-7 where really that good. We've had two death stars taken out by the equivalent of a sopwith camel and we're even talking about what is believable in this one. I will admit the gravity bombs were pretty hilarious.

                      It's a movie, enjoy the ride. The sword fight after lizard man was killed was cool.

                      And yes, like every one of them, the writing needed to be better.

                      It was so awful it turned almost half a billion the first weekend.
                      It's almost as if all his overconfident, absolutist assertions were spoonfed to him by a trusted website or subreddit. Sheeple
                      RIP Tony Bogey & Baron O

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                      • #12
                        I heard Snoke’s part got cut in half
                        “It is no use trying to 'see through' first principles. If you see through everything, then everything is transparent. But a wholly transparent world is an invisible world. To 'see through' all things is the same as not to see.”

                        ― C.S. Lewis, The Abolition of Man

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                        • #13
                          It's almost as if all his overconfident, absolutist assertions were spoonfed to him by a trusted website or subreddit. Sheeple
                          RIP Tony Bogey & Baron O

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Why did they even build that character up if they were just going to cut him in short order?
                            Try http://wordforge.net/index.php for discussion and debate.

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                            • #15
                              So they can reveal the TRUE evil that lurks behind that puppet Snokes in the next movie...
                              No, I did not steal that from somebody on Something Awful.

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