Question for Poly's grammermatitians:

[self biased]

You'll get no argument from me. English is a silly language with stupid rules.

NO U.

[Sava]

You've got language pride?

[molly bloom]

If you're pronouncing "Sean" as "Shawn" you should be pronouncing "Bean" as "Bhawn".

Consistency.

And thus ghoti is pronounced fish, obviously.

[loinburger]

If you're pronouncing "Sean" as "Shawn" you should be pronouncing "Bean" as "Bhawn".

Consistency.

Gödel's incompleteness theorems prove that you can't have a consistent natural language unless it's so inexpressive as to be useless in modern times (perhaps the ur-languages used by paleolithic tribes could achieve consistency, since they only had a dozen words or so). The proof of inconsistency goes like this: if you put your testicles in a box with a source of radiation, and then you close the box, then your testicles exist in an indeterminate state of having cancer and not having cancer, and this is why Achilles can never catch up to the tortoise.

[molly bloom]

If Achilles was really interested in racing a tortoise, he clearly should have spent more time dressing as a girl.